Josh Johnson

Trump, you want to take this argument to the streets?

That's cool.

Macron will take it to the streets, by which I mean the World Economic Forum in Davos, the nicest street in the world.

So, President Macron, time to deliver a speech that is focused and clear-eyed.

I'm sorry.

Those glasses are very distracting.

I can't tell if you're the president of France or the lead of CSI Paris.

Now, to be fair, he said he wore sunglasses because there's something wrong with his eye, which is disappointing to learn.

Like, why can't you just be cool for a cool reason?

That's like if you saw a bulge in someone's pants, and just as you were getting impressed, they were like, I see you've noticed my diaper.

But this shit is getting out of control.

Trump is threatening an invasion.

Le Top Gun is saying we won't be bullied.

Does Donald Trump have any way of getting Greenland without a war?

I've been joined America.

Where's my signing bonus?

I thought the reason we couldn't have healthcare and stuff is because we were broke.

If you think Greenland needs this money, let me introduce you to a place called Detroit.

Because I know America would do a lot of strange for that much change, but let's see how the people of Greenland feel about it.

First thing, we're not all about fake lips and boobs.