Josh Johnson

You don't even have sewers anymore.

There are no stores in Portland.

You're telling me if I type stores in Portland into Google Maps, it'll just be like, nah, nah, this is one of those store cities.

Nah, we not doing that nasty stuff over here, okay?

Also, not having stores isn't exactly the worst thing about a war zone.

No one was looking at Hiroshima like the devastation was incredible.

Not a single Bob's Discount Furniture left standing.

But here's the thing, Trump.

I don't think the situation in Portland is a five-alarm, DEFCON 1, bust-out-the-windows type of emergency.

And I don't think you think that either.

Because this whole meeting, where you're talking about how dangerous Antifa is, you all look bored as hell.

Trump is falling asleep.

Pam Bondi got to tilt her neck up to stay awake, you know?

Stephen Miller is-is yawning.

The most radical person in the cabinet looked like he drained, you know?

He looks like he's sitting at a piano recital after his kid finished.

Also, you would think that if we're all about to die, Antifa would be the only network on your mind.

They're so pathetic.

Come on, guys, all right?

The plan is to scare people about Antifa.