Trump Brokers Peace in the Middle East & Declares War Against Antifa in Portland? | Hunter Prosper
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You're listening to Comedy Central. From the most trusted journalists at Comedy Central, it's America's only source for news. This is The Daily Show with your host, Josh Johnson.
Welcome to The Daily Show. I'm Josh Johnson. We've got so much to talk about tonight. Marco Rubio gets caught passing notes in class, Kristi Noem gets in a fight with a chicken, and Donald Trump has a pretend intelligence briefing about a pretend terrorist group. So, let's get into the headlines. Let's get right into the biggest story in the world. This is one of those sentences that you almost never hear, but there's good news coming out of the Middle East.
Major breakthrough in the Middle East. President Trump was the first to announce that Israel and Hamas have agreed to the first phase of a deal that could lead to the end of the war in Gaza.
This is more than Gaza. This is peace in the Middle East, and it's an incredible thing.
Over in Gaza, Palestinian men and boys ran into the streets, clapping and cheering. In Israel, a similar scene of joy. That's right. A peace deal has been reached between Israel and Hamas. And it's based on the framework Donald Trump proposed, which means another thing you almost never hear. And I can't believe I'm saying this. I got to give Donald Trump some props here. You know, it doesn't happen a lot. In fact, I can only think of this, the COVID vaccine, and Home Alone 2. Now... Don't get me wrong. This is astonishing because if this piece holds, it means the guy who couldn't stop a fight between Gary Busey and Meat Loaf brokered peace in the Middle East. So Trump, when it comes to peace, you did it.
I mean, you also did a big portion of the war, but you did the peace too. It's like how white people did slavery in America, but they also ended slavery in America. And I just want to say thank you. Thank you. Either way, this is a reason to celebrate. And look, if this deal holds, maybe we should give Trump the Nobel Peace Prize. Or, or, or, and you won't like this either, we let him burn the Epstein files. He only gets one, but he gets to pick, all right? Now, maybe you're wondering how the world found out about this peace deal. Was it a grand announcement like the Treaty of Versailles or like the end of World War II where nurses and soldiers met up in Times Square just to make out? Now, now, this is Trump's America, so it was much stupider.
At the White House yesterday, the president interrupted by Secretary of State Marco Rubio, seen handing him a note and then whispering in Trump's ear. Photographers catching the handwritten message. We need you to approve a truth social post soon so you can announce deal first. Wait, they plan his truth social post? So when I see one all misspelled and half in caps at 3 in the morning, that was the plan? It's like scheduling that you're going to shit your pants. But you know what? If he can resolve the conflict in the Middle East, maybe he truly is the president of peace. Maybe some of that peace and tranquility is going to come back to us.
President Trump sending National Guard troops into American cities. Trump is insisting that troops are needed in cities like Chicago, Memphis, and Portland.
We have an insurrection act for a reason. Damn! This feels like he made peace abroad just so he could bring everybody back to whoop ass here. I mean, a president hasn't invoked the Insurrection Act since the LA riots, which for Trump is actually a surprisingly recent precedent. Usually he's invoking something that hasn't been used in 300 years, like the anti-witch-you-can-toss-a-bitch-off-a-cliff act of 1692. But what's happening in Portland that requires Trump to send troops in? Well, Trump held a big meeting yesterday to explain why.
It should be clear to all Americans that we have a very serious left-wing terror threat in our country. Radicals associated with the domestic terror group Antifa.
Antifa, that's who you're declaring a domestic terrorist organization. That's tricky because while there are people who identify as Antifa, it isn't really an official group.
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