Lauren (Caller)

And then anytime we try to have like a real authentic conversation with him of like, yeah, that sucks.

Let's talk about it.

It turns into like, we're against him and all these things.

And it,

It just, like, builds and builds.

And I do live relatively close to him now.

And every time he comes out, it's just this, like, I feel like I have a stranger sitting in my room, in my living room with my children.

And he won't stay in my home.

He won't let me cook him a meal in my own home.

Like, it became a big fight, me just wanting to cook for him and have him at my table.

And I just was like, why am I putting myself through all this emotional stuff?

all this emotions and this drama for something that I don't necessarily want because I feel like I have no need for it, I guess.

I don't know how else to describe that.

Well, because looking back at our childhood, I mean...

She's probably one of the only reasons my dad even had some sort of an open window.

She signed and sent all of my Christmas cards and birthday presents.

And when we would spend a few weeks in the summertime with him, she was the one making the memories.

And, like, she was the one trying to have a relationship with us.

And my dad wasn't.

I mean, even though he would make these grand, giant, like, I love yous and I miss you and I would jump in front of a bus for you.