Lawrence

It was something that I didn't deny it when she brought it up.

I admitted to it.

It was something that I had struggled previously with.

Um, years and years and years ago, um, wouldn't necessarily say addicted to it, but, but struggled with it.

Um, I'd stopped, um, and then kind of relapsed back into it, um, in the last year, year and a half.

Um, and about August, um,

I kind of had that realization of, you know, I'm a married guy.

I've got a wife.

What am I doing?

And stopped cold turkey.

But she went through that money app and did some digging and investigating on her own and found it.

I tried to cover it up.

It was an app where you could change the name of the charges and things like that.

I had seen it on their website.

I tried to cover it up out of shame and guilt.

Never admitted it to her out of shame and guilt.

I had told her that I had previously had a problem with porn and admitted that to her later in our relationship out of a fear of being vulnerable to her and being judged for it.

And I guess when she did her whole investigating thing,

and found it, it blew up to, I can't be trusted.

Um, she called me a cheater a couple of times, um, which hurt, which hurt the most.