Leo Skeppi

So with social media and online fame and all that and my podcast, there's been this thing about me where I get no residual carryover confidence.

Like every time I do something, it wipes out in my brain.

Like I could never...

understand why i'm not able to be a cocky asshole why am i not allowed to look at my tiktok account that has 10.9 million followers and feel any kind of self-esteem like yeah i have all these followers people with 100,000 followers walk around in day-to-day life like they got the biggest dick in the world so like i

was always a little envious of like people who get confidence from such superficial bullshit.

It kind of was irritating me.

It was, it was.

But like, even when I went on tour,

After it happened, I get no confidence from thinking about past achievements with being a nurse, getting my real estate license, going on tour, amassing the following that I have, having my podcast be what it is and be so successful for so long.

So low.

I never had a guest.

I don't feel any kind of it doesn't feed me like the external validation of like the numbers doesn't feed me and it never has.

And I felt very broken emotionally.

I felt like this for a while where it's like an empty cup, but like the bottom is broken.

It's like, it doesn't matter how much external validation comes in.

It just falls through.

And it's been sad.

For me, someone asked me the other day, what is it like to be you?

And I said, you'd never want to fucking know.

Because I felt trapped in this personal hell of nothing I do can make me feel any kind of self-esteem for long.