Lindsay Addario

And I've lost friends and colleagues.

And journalism is equated with death now in a way that it wasn't when I first started out.

When I first started out, yeah, we put press and journalists and TV on our flak jackets and helmets and

And our cars and on the top of our cars in case there was an airstrike to be had.

And, you know, it's ridiculous.

Now, of course, I read that passage and I was so naive.

Well, it was a combination of things.

I think what happens in these situations is like, you know, we survived.

Our driver, Mohammed, did not.

The New York Times sent a team back to Libya to see if they could help find him in one of the prisons, if he was still alive.

And

Essentially, he was never found alive.

And so we assume he was executed or killed in crossfire in that moment.

And so there's like a survivor's guilt that happens or that I felt.

And so when Tim and Chris were killed –

Basically, I had been emailing with Tim and Chris.

I spent the New Year's Eve with them that year with both of them and a bunch of other photographers.

And Tim and I were emailing in the lead up to his arrival in Libya.

He was asking me all sorts of questions about what to bring and everything.

And then when we survived that horrific experience in Libya where we should have been killed – I mean we could have been killed I don't know how many different – on how many different occasions.