Lisa Bilyeu

That's such a great breakdown. And I love how you think. Like, I really love how you think because every time I'm like, okay, he's going to answer it like this. You never do. Like the idea of like asking yourself those questions is so important. Like a thousand percent. Because it's on you. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I think, but...

Look, I started Women of Impact Channel so that women never feel like they give their power away again. Where are the moments where we end up losing that control or losing our power and we never find it again? We spend the rest of our life feeling weak, unable to get back up metaphorically. And so I love the personal ownership. I love it because then no one can impact it except for me.

Look, I started Women of Impact Channel so that women never feel like they give their power away again. Where are the moments where we end up losing that control or losing our power and we never find it again? We spend the rest of our life feeling weak, unable to get back up metaphorically. And so I love the personal ownership. I love it because then no one can impact it except for me.

And so even the way you broke it down, I think for me, I would have given my power away to that person. How long are you going to take? When are you going to do it by? I thought you said you were going to do this, but you didn't just do that.

And so even the way you broke it down, I think for me, I would have given my power away to that person. How long are you going to take? When are you going to do it by? I thought you said you were going to do this, but you didn't just do that.

It's such a good technique. In thinking about change as well, the one thing that Tom and I do is if I'm trying to change something. So I used to say to him, like, you always or you never, right? I was very dramatic like that. And I realized it. I made a very conscious effort to stop. But when you've been doing it in a relationship for 15, 20 years, it's so natural. So I start changing my behavior.

It's such a good technique. In thinking about change as well, the one thing that Tom and I do is if I'm trying to change something. So I used to say to him, like, you always or you never, right? I was very dramatic like that. And I realized it. I made a very conscious effort to stop. But when you've been doing it in a relationship for 15, 20 years, it's so natural. So I start changing my behavior.

And it was like something like three or four months. I hadn't said it. I I caught myself every time. And then I go and accidentally drop it. And he's like, here you go. You go and do absolute. I'm like, you're right. I've been doing it. I haven't been doing it for four months and I just messed up. And he's like, what do you mean you haven't been doing it for four months?

And it was like something like three or four months. I hadn't said it. I I caught myself every time. And then I go and accidentally drop it. And he's like, here you go. You go and do absolute. I'm like, you're right. I've been doing it. I haven't been doing it for four months and I just messed up. And he's like, what do you mean you haven't been doing it for four months?

And so I realized, and we use this language with each other. It's like, I understand that your mental map of me hasn't quite updated yet. And so it's going to take time for his mental map of me to update. It's kind of a way of saying you may not have noticed, but I understand why. Yes. Because I think that's also on the other side, we blame them. I can't believe you ever noticed.

And so I realized, and we use this language with each other. It's like, I understand that your mental map of me hasn't quite updated yet. And so it's going to take time for his mental map of me to update. It's kind of a way of saying you may not have noticed, but I understand why. Yes. Because I think that's also on the other side, we blame them. I can't believe you ever noticed.

You said that you wanted me to do the dishes. I've been doing the bloody dishes for two weeks and you haven't even noticed. Now we get annoyed and we just give up.

You said that you wanted me to do the dishes. I've been doing the bloody dishes for two weeks and you haven't even noticed. Now we get annoyed and we just give up.

That's so good. Do you think a couple can recover from infidelity?

That's so good. Do you think a couple can recover from infidelity?

And where do you think people go wrong? Because there's two types of people. The person that leaves immediately, get that. And the person that stays in or just like keeps forgiving them.

And where do you think people go wrong? Because there's two types of people. The person that leaves immediately, get that. And the person that stays in or just like keeps forgiving them.

So you have to make sure that you're always showing me love, always showing me with affection so that I never have to deal with the emotion of the hurt that you've caused.

So you have to make sure that you're always showing me love, always showing me with affection so that I never have to deal with the emotion of the hurt that you've caused.

Most times I assume they're going to fake it or say, no, no, no, I'm never going to do it again. And maybe in that moment they really believe it. But the deep work that you're really kind of breaking down, I think really brings everything to the surface. So there's nowhere to hide and there's no miscommunication.