Matt Abrahams

And then Charles Duhigg calls this looping. It's this notion of you start with what the person says, you loop back to it, and then you move forward. And they're both talking about exactly the same thing. It's you recognize what the person has said, which validates them, which builds connection and trust, but it also gives you a starting point for what comes next.

So I like this one-third you talking, two-thirds them talking approach.

So I like this one-third you talking, two-thirds them talking approach.

So I like this one-third you talking, two-thirds them talking approach.

So I like this one-third you talking, two-thirds them talking approach.

So I like this one-third you talking, two-thirds them talking approach.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why going into those situations, thinking about questions you might want to ask is always a good thing. Even if it's spontaneous, even if I'm going into a party or to some kind of conference setting where there's going to be people milling around, right before I go in the room, I can come up with two or three questions that I'm interested in.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why going into those situations, thinking about questions you might want to ask is always a good thing. Even if it's spontaneous, even if I'm going into a party or to some kind of conference setting where there's going to be people milling around, right before I go in the room, I can come up with two or three questions that I'm interested in.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why going into those situations, thinking about questions you might want to ask is always a good thing. Even if it's spontaneous, even if I'm going into a party or to some kind of conference setting where there's going to be people milling around, right before I go in the room, I can come up with two or three questions that I'm interested in.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why going into those situations, thinking about questions you might want to ask is always a good thing. Even if it's spontaneous, even if I'm going into a party or to some kind of conference setting where there's going to be people milling around, right before I go in the room, I can come up with two or three questions that I'm interested in.

Absolutely. Absolutely. And that's why going into those situations, thinking about questions you might want to ask is always a good thing. Even if it's spontaneous, even if I'm going into a party or to some kind of conference setting where there's going to be people milling around, right before I go in the room, I can come up with two or three questions that I'm interested in.

Absolutely, Halala. You are right. We can prepare to be spontaneous. And that sounds counterintuitive, but it really is true. One of the key ways to get yourself prepared is to become familiar with structure. Most of us, when we are nervous and we're put on the spot, we just list and itemize things. We just say whatever comes into our mind.

Absolutely, Halala. You are right. We can prepare to be spontaneous. And that sounds counterintuitive, but it really is true. One of the key ways to get yourself prepared is to become familiar with structure. Most of us, when we are nervous and we're put on the spot, we just list and itemize things. We just say whatever comes into our mind.

Absolutely, Halala. You are right. We can prepare to be spontaneous. And that sounds counterintuitive, but it really is true. One of the key ways to get yourself prepared is to become familiar with structure. Most of us, when we are nervous and we're put on the spot, we just list and itemize things. We just say whatever comes into our mind.

Absolutely, Halala. You are right. We can prepare to be spontaneous. And that sounds counterintuitive, but it really is true. One of the key ways to get yourself prepared is to become familiar with structure. Most of us, when we are nervous and we're put on the spot, we just list and itemize things. We just say whatever comes into our mind.

Absolutely, Halala. You are right. We can prepare to be spontaneous. And that sounds counterintuitive, but it really is true. One of the key ways to get yourself prepared is to become familiar with structure. Most of us, when we are nervous and we're put on the spot, we just list and itemize things. We just say whatever comes into our mind.

And that's how I start. Because you're right. People like to talk. People like to share information about themselves. Having those questions at the ready can really help you.

And that's how I start. Because you're right. People like to talk. People like to share information about themselves. Having those questions at the ready can really help you.

And that's how I start. Because you're right. People like to talk. People like to share information about themselves. Having those questions at the ready can really help you.

And that's how I start. Because you're right. People like to talk. People like to share information about themselves. Having those questions at the ready can really help you.