Matthew Hussey

It might help someone feel seen today.

But in six months, it won't stop their emotional flashback.

It won't stop them having a revisit of these feelings a year from now when they think about that betrayal.

And you're going to have to be along for that ride and respect the damage you have done and respect that your job now is to be an enormous part of the reparation of that damage.

What I see routinely is people who have been cheated on trying to do the work for the both of them.

Like, can I be back with them?

I don't know.

What are they saying right now?

What are they saying?

Are they saying, you know, I know what I've done.

I know that this has caused deep damage.

I know this is gonna take a long time.

I'm gonna be with you the whole way.

Not only that, I'm gonna, the thing that happened for me, that what triggered that

It is never gonna trigger me again in that way.

That's never gonna be my response to that trigger again because I'm gonna go out and do the work to make sure that that's never my response to that trigger again.

And that might mean therapy over time, might mean coaching over time.

That is gonna be a long journey for them.

There's a great line, Jacob M. Broad said, consider how hard it is to change yourself and you'll realize how foolish it is to think you can change someone else.

How many of you at the beginning of every year set a resolution that's really, really, really important to you and then by the end of January you've broken it?