Matthew Hussey

Why is that a turnoff for some women?

Well, let's say it was all good intentions, though.

No, no, but those might be good intentions.

And she was like, I shouldn't be saying this, but when he's too nice to me, it's kind of a turnoff.

It could be too creepy.

But what if someone is genuinely nice?

They're just maybe not mean to them, but they're not showing them poetry and flowers, but they're just attentive.

Kind.

What is a woman truly saying if they say, I don't like nice guys?

It's familiar.

And most likely, it sounds like their father probably was either rude to their mother or rude to them.

I can relate to this because in previous seasons of life, I really struggled of having the hard conversations.

I dreaded it.

Me too.

Looking back, I can say, man, that's crazy.

Just have the conversation and whatever.

Just deal with it.

But in the moment, when I didn't have the tools or the nervous system to feel safe myself, and I needed the approval of someone else to feel safe, or I needed someone else to be okay with the hard conversation that I was having, and when they weren't okay with it, or they would explode, or they would cry, or they would scream, or they would not speak to me for two days or something, because they were upset of what I wanted to talk about,

or they avoided it, it would make me feel like, oh, I'm really insecure.

And I always had the fear of like, I guess it was being alone or it was like the person not loving me in return or me not being good enough or something like that.