Michael Sorensen

And oftentimes if we provide that, you know, somebody comes to us with a problem, we just go, oh my gosh, I can't even believe that.

and we just leave it at that and let them keep talking, that's what they're looking for.

Versus, well, did you try this?

Well, then you should do that.

Or I'm sure he didn't mean to hurt you.

All of those are invalidating statements.

And they essentially tell the other person, don't feel whatever you're feeling.

And that's where a lot of us go.

I talk and teach and preach about validation all the time, and not last week.

My wife came to me with something, and I immediately jumped in trying to fix it or give her advice, and she just stopped and looked at me and said, Michael, I don't need you to fix it.

I just want you to validate me.

And I thought, oh, shoot.

Well, I'm happy you asked that because that is what we assume most of the time.

And I think in large part, that's because we, as men feel like our emotions don't matter, or we almost don't like to admit when we are, when we are emotional.

And yet, if we're sticking with stereotypes for a moment, men also stereotypically can be quite prideful.

Right.

Or we have a bit of an ego.

We don't necessarily like to need help.

And so we might not admit it.

And yet most of the time, you know, if I'm talking with a buddy of mine or a coworker and he's telling me something that's frustrating and I try to help him fix it.