Michelle Chalfant

Yeah, I want to become more healthy with you. Of course. Okay, cool. So give me some grace because I'm going to be clumsy when I do it. I mean, think about a little kid learning how to walk. They're going to fall down. We don't yell at that little kid when they're a year old. We give them grace. So when we're learning boundaries, we start with people that are safe or safer.

Yeah, I want to become more healthy with you. Of course. Okay, cool. So give me some grace because I'm going to be clumsy when I do it. I mean, think about a little kid learning how to walk. They're going to fall down. We don't yell at that little kid when they're a year old. We give them grace. So when we're learning boundaries, we start with people that are safe or safer.

Yeah, I want to become more healthy with you. Of course. Okay, cool. So give me some grace because I'm going to be clumsy when I do it. I mean, think about a little kid learning how to walk. They're going to fall down. We don't yell at that little kid when they're a year old. We give them grace. So when we're learning boundaries, we start with people that are safe or safer.

And we let them know, I'm learning how to do this. And I want you, Heather, to be able to set boundaries with me. And I want to be able to do that with you. This is a muscle we both need to work on. Yes. Yes. Cool. All right, let's go. Here's what I'm going to set with you. So that's how we start setting boundaries where it might be uncomfortable. I'm vulnerable. I'm going to pad it.

And we let them know, I'm learning how to do this. And I want you, Heather, to be able to set boundaries with me. And I want to be able to do that with you. This is a muscle we both need to work on. Yes. Yes. Cool. All right, let's go. Here's what I'm going to set with you. So that's how we start setting boundaries where it might be uncomfortable. I'm vulnerable. I'm going to pad it.

And we let them know, I'm learning how to do this. And I want you, Heather, to be able to set boundaries with me. And I want to be able to do that with you. This is a muscle we both need to work on. Yes. Yes. Cool. All right, let's go. Here's what I'm going to set with you. So that's how we start setting boundaries where it might be uncomfortable. I'm vulnerable. I'm going to pad it.

I'm going to tell you again how great you are and how much I cherish our relationship. And then I set the boundary. I speak up for what I'm looking for, for what I want.

I'm going to tell you again how great you are and how much I cherish our relationship. And then I set the boundary. I speak up for what I'm looking for, for what I want.

I'm going to tell you again how great you are and how much I cherish our relationship. And then I set the boundary. I speak up for what I'm looking for, for what I want.

Totally. And I say this, people typically, like if I say to you, hey, Heather, I need to talk to you later. Are you around? How do you feel?

Totally. And I say this, people typically, like if I say to you, hey, Heather, I need to talk to you later. Are you around? How do you feel?

Totally. And I say this, people typically, like if I say to you, hey, Heather, I need to talk to you later. Are you around? How do you feel?

Like, oh crap. Michelle's so mad at me. It's like, or hey Heather, or if I text you, which is worse, texting puts people in fight or flight. When my clients would come in and they're like, I'm just going to text so-and-so and let them know how I feel. I'm like, do not text. You've got to do it over the phone or in person. You don't text boundaries over the phone. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Like, oh crap. Michelle's so mad at me. It's like, or hey Heather, or if I text you, which is worse, texting puts people in fight or flight. When my clients would come in and they're like, I'm just going to text so-and-so and let them know how I feel. I'm like, do not text. You've got to do it over the phone or in person. You don't text boundaries over the phone. No, no, no, no, no, no.

Like, oh crap. Michelle's so mad at me. It's like, or hey Heather, or if I text you, which is worse, texting puts people in fight or flight. When my clients would come in and they're like, I'm just going to text so-and-so and let them know how I feel. I'm like, do not text. You've got to do it over the phone or in person. You don't text boundaries over the phone. No, no, no, no, no, no.

But if I say to you, hey, I need to talk to you later, you're like, oh, God, what did I do? I'm in trouble. Versus, hey, Heather, you know, I want to share with you blah, blah, blah later. Are you free at four o'clock? Yeah, sure. So we really want to make sure that people are what I call putting down their swords and shields. and doing the sandwich, it takes the defenses down.

But if I say to you, hey, I need to talk to you later, you're like, oh, God, what did I do? I'm in trouble. Versus, hey, Heather, you know, I want to share with you blah, blah, blah later. Are you free at four o'clock? Yeah, sure. So we really want to make sure that people are what I call putting down their swords and shields. and doing the sandwich, it takes the defenses down.

But if I say to you, hey, I need to talk to you later, you're like, oh, God, what did I do? I'm in trouble. Versus, hey, Heather, you know, I want to share with you blah, blah, blah later. Are you free at four o'clock? Yeah, sure. So we really want to make sure that people are what I call putting down their swords and shields. and doing the sandwich, it takes the defenses down.

It's like, hey, I've got some things I'm learning. I want to share them with you later today. Are you free? Let's go out and have a coffee and we'll chit chat about it. Are you free? Yeah, sure. And your defenses are down. So the padding helps you to drop your defenses if you and I are going to have a conversation.

It's like, hey, I've got some things I'm learning. I want to share them with you later today. Are you free? Let's go out and have a coffee and we'll chit chat about it. Are you free? Yeah, sure. And your defenses are down. So the padding helps you to drop your defenses if you and I are going to have a conversation.