Myesha Battle

And I do think that there's definitely a person who is trying to figure out whether they can handle monogamy or non-monogamy.

And they find themselves in a situation where

oh shit, you know, I can't handle monogamy, right?

There are people for whom that happens, of course.

But are there people that use non-monogamy as an excuse for their behavior?

Absolutely.

It is a trauma, and I think recognizing it and labeling it as such is a great first step.

It's not just something that happened in your relationship.

It has an impact on you.

It may have an impact on whether the relationship continues.

You know, in my case, it was my living situation.

You know, I couldn't stay there.

You know, it impacts so many things and you're feeling all of that in your nervous system.

It can create a PTSD response.

It can certainly diminish your feelings of trust and safety in relationships of all kinds.

So really having a lot of support during this time, whether that's family and community that just takes you in, no questions asked, like mine did, or friends saying, you know, I've been through the same thing and whatever you need, let me help.

Like my friend coming with garbage bags to just dump all my stuff and get me out of the house.

Yeah.

Or, you know, starting therapy when you're ready.

So, yeah, it sometimes takes a village to get through this.