Nick Pollard

And there's ways that you can tune that to make it better, right? So if you have something like that, so if you have that kind of inferiority complex plus a superior complex plus impulse control is a great example, you can do great things.

But if you just have this idea that I'm not enough and that's sort of the main track in the background, then you're always trying to measure up to something that doesn't actually exist. And so often this comes from, you know, it's kind of a pivot point where you have like one parent that was super involved in your life and then one parent that wasn't. Maybe they were abusive.

But if you just have this idea that I'm not enough and that's sort of the main track in the background, then you're always trying to measure up to something that doesn't actually exist. And so often this comes from, you know, it's kind of a pivot point where you have like one parent that was super involved in your life and then one parent that wasn't. Maybe they were abusive.

But if you just have this idea that I'm not enough and that's sort of the main track in the background, then you're always trying to measure up to something that doesn't actually exist. And so often this comes from, you know, it's kind of a pivot point where you have like one parent that was super involved in your life and then one parent that wasn't. Maybe they were abusive.

Very similar to kind of the nice guy narrative where you show up trying to gain acceptance and love because the only way you know how to do that is to either not show up, like to be completely invisible, right?

Very similar to kind of the nice guy narrative where you show up trying to gain acceptance and love because the only way you know how to do that is to either not show up, like to be completely invisible, right?

Very similar to kind of the nice guy narrative where you show up trying to gain acceptance and love because the only way you know how to do that is to either not show up, like to be completely invisible, right?

or to make everyone else happy right or to keep everyone else calm or to constantly be in a peace peacekeeping you know frame of mind and i think that's where people get really hung up that's the one of the typical childhood situations that people pleases would have very typical um you know i've got i've got one-on-one clients all over the world kind of coming from every um every background you know everything from ceo down to you know you know pick a position but um

or to make everyone else happy right or to keep everyone else calm or to constantly be in a peace peacekeeping you know frame of mind and i think that's where people get really hung up that's the one of the typical childhood situations that people pleases would have very typical um you know i've got i've got one-on-one clients all over the world kind of coming from every um every background you know everything from ceo down to you know you know pick a position but um

or to make everyone else happy right or to keep everyone else calm or to constantly be in a peace peacekeeping you know frame of mind and i think that's where people get really hung up that's the one of the typical childhood situations that people pleases would have very typical um you know i've got i've got one-on-one clients all over the world kind of coming from every um every background you know everything from ceo down to you know you know pick a position but um

The thing that I would say is the most common is generally speaking, one parent made it was an enmeshment issue. So one parent made that child the center of their world and then the other didn't. So and so what that teaches them is that, you know, to make this other person happy means they won't get abandoned. If they don't get abandoned, they'll get their needs met.

The thing that I would say is the most common is generally speaking, one parent made it was an enmeshment issue. So one parent made that child the center of their world and then the other didn't. So and so what that teaches them is that, you know, to make this other person happy means they won't get abandoned. If they don't get abandoned, they'll get their needs met.

The thing that I would say is the most common is generally speaking, one parent made it was an enmeshment issue. So one parent made that child the center of their world and then the other didn't. So and so what that teaches them is that, you know, to make this other person happy means they won't get abandoned. If they don't get abandoned, they'll get their needs met.

And then this kind of just plays out in childhood. I forget who said it to me, but it was they called it a transference. So it's like you developed a childhood coping strategy and you kept it all the way through your adulthood and now it's not serving you. And nobody really knows what to do with that. So then you have to figure out, like, what do I do now to make my life better?

And then this kind of just plays out in childhood. I forget who said it to me, but it was they called it a transference. So it's like you developed a childhood coping strategy and you kept it all the way through your adulthood and now it's not serving you. And nobody really knows what to do with that. So then you have to figure out, like, what do I do now to make my life better?

And then this kind of just plays out in childhood. I forget who said it to me, but it was they called it a transference. So it's like you developed a childhood coping strategy and you kept it all the way through your adulthood and now it's not serving you. And nobody really knows what to do with that. So then you have to figure out, like, what do I do now to make my life better?

That's sounding like a real son of a bitch. Most of the time, people pleasers are liars. And that's probably the most common denominator among all of the people I've ever worked with is this dishonesty in Just in how they show up in general. Right. So lying is one of the bigger things, but you have to then identify what is a lie.

That's sounding like a real son of a bitch. Most of the time, people pleasers are liars. And that's probably the most common denominator among all of the people I've ever worked with is this dishonesty in Just in how they show up in general. Right. So lying is one of the bigger things, but you have to then identify what is a lie.

That's sounding like a real son of a bitch. Most of the time, people pleasers are liars. And that's probably the most common denominator among all of the people I've ever worked with is this dishonesty in Just in how they show up in general. Right. So lying is one of the bigger things, but you have to then identify what is a lie.

You know, so saying yes, when you mean to say no, well, that's dishonest. Right. Committing to things you don't want to go to. Well, that is also dishonest. And so when I work with people and they and they kind of realize, oh, my God, I lie all the time. And it's not that you're lying to the person on purpose. It's not in this kind of malicious way.