Nick Pollard

And I ask people that all the time and in exactly the same way. It's like, how important really are you? Are you really that important that if you say no, I don't want to go to lunch with you, they're going to go outside and stick a fire hose from the tailpipe into the window? Probably not. I think they're going to be okay. They'll have a margarita by themselves, right?

And I ask people that all the time and in exactly the same way. It's like, how important really are you? Are you really that important that if you say no, I don't want to go to lunch with you, they're going to go outside and stick a fire hose from the tailpipe into the window? Probably not. I think they're going to be okay. They'll have a margarita by themselves, right?

And so I think there's a self-importance. This is where people pleasing and narcissism tend to bump up against each other a lot. It's like your no is about as meaningless as your yes because you never say no. So when you say no, nobody believes you. And when you say yes, less and less people are believing you because you're so overcommitted you can't show up.

And so I think there's a self-importance. This is where people pleasing and narcissism tend to bump up against each other a lot. It's like your no is about as meaningless as your yes because you never say no. So when you say no, nobody believes you. And when you say yes, less and less people are believing you because you're so overcommitted you can't show up.

And so I think there's a self-importance. This is where people pleasing and narcissism tend to bump up against each other a lot. It's like your no is about as meaningless as your yes because you never say no. So when you say no, nobody believes you. And when you say yes, less and less people are believing you because you're so overcommitted you can't show up.

So when you start saying no to things, you're going to be uncomfortable. Everyone else is probably just going to be surprised.

So when you start saying no to things, you're going to be uncomfortable. Everyone else is probably just going to be surprised.

So when you start saying no to things, you're going to be uncomfortable. Everyone else is probably just going to be surprised.

Yes. Initially, it gets – and it's not –

Yes. Initially, it gets – and it's not –

Yes. Initially, it gets – and it's not –

It's a very lonely way to live. Because you constantly feel like you're in a transaction with everybody around you. And you never really know what your value is to other people. And you start to think, okay, I really don't have any friends. So you kind of feel lonely. But then when you start to prioritize yourself as equal to other people, those people start to leave your life.

It's a very lonely way to live. Because you constantly feel like you're in a transaction with everybody around you. And you never really know what your value is to other people. And you start to think, okay, I really don't have any friends. So you kind of feel lonely. But then when you start to prioritize yourself as equal to other people, those people start to leave your life.

It's a very lonely way to live. Because you constantly feel like you're in a transaction with everybody around you. And you never really know what your value is to other people. And you start to think, okay, I really don't have any friends. So you kind of feel lonely. But then when you start to prioritize yourself as equal to other people, those people start to leave your life.

And then you're like, well, now I'm so lonely. Well, you were lonely anyway. I don't even have my fake friends anymore. Right. No, I don't even have the bartender that said that they liked me, right? It's the same thing as when I quit drinking. I had all these friends. But when you drank the way that I did, you start to realize that those friends were, you were just a joke.

And then you're like, well, now I'm so lonely. Well, you were lonely anyway. I don't even have my fake friends anymore. Right. No, I don't even have the bartender that said that they liked me, right? It's the same thing as when I quit drinking. I had all these friends. But when you drank the way that I did, you start to realize that those friends were, you were just a joke.

And then you're like, well, now I'm so lonely. Well, you were lonely anyway. I don't even have my fake friends anymore. Right. No, I don't even have the bartender that said that they liked me, right? It's the same thing as when I quit drinking. I had all these friends. But when you drank the way that I did, you start to realize that those friends were, you were just a joke.

You were a paycheck and a joke. And very often, the people that will exit your life when you start to do this work are Two things will happen. Either they'll, they'll go and they'll stay gone. Um, but more often they circle back. Um, you know, I had a friend, we were watching football the other day and he said, I really liked this version of you better.

You were a paycheck and a joke. And very often, the people that will exit your life when you start to do this work are Two things will happen. Either they'll, they'll go and they'll stay gone. Um, but more often they circle back. Um, you know, I had a friend, we were watching football the other day and he said, I really liked this version of you better.

You were a paycheck and a joke. And very often, the people that will exit your life when you start to do this work are Two things will happen. Either they'll, they'll go and they'll stay gone. Um, but more often they circle back. Um, you know, I had a friend, we were watching football the other day and he said, I really liked this version of you better.