Nikki Baird
speaker
146 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard Apr 2025
last heard Apr 2025
Nikki Baird’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
And it really shows how friends can make you feel insecure unintentionally through things like just this concept of being a three-person friend group and how she has these moments of seeing the two of them talk to each other or laugh with one another and how that makes her feel so sad and insecure. And it's not because they're doing anything to her, but it makes her reflect on herself.
And also with this idea of like this competition that they all feel towards each other and Not just in terms of like little things. And they talk about their lives and their choices and how so-and-so dedicated their life to a job and how this person's an actor and she's famous, but this other person has a really beautiful family and a nice home, blah, blah, blah.
Like it's almost inadvertent the way that they are not trying to compete directly, but the comparisons they draw between themselves is inevitable. And that is because they all grew up together. When you have this idea of we all started from the same place, there's always this element of like, could that have been me? Did I choose wrong? Did I do this? Blah, blah, blah, blah.
And again, like that is such an interesting, I think, dynamic to explore. And I don't think we see this with a lot of the flaws, especially in Jacqueline when she's like trying to hook up with Valentin. And what's fascinating is like, Jacqueline doesn't want the boy. She wants to win the competition.
And you will meet a lot of people like this in your life, where in order to feel better about themselves, they have to bring somebody else down. And a very easy way to do that is they just manufacture a competition. Even if they're not interested in that boy or whatever, if they can say,
Okay, we are both going to go after this boy and he's showing interest in you, but I can pull that interest away from you onto me. In my head, somehow it will prove that you are here and I am here. I'm just a little bit better because this other person outside source validated me in this way that I can't get on my own. And what's so sad about that is it doesn't fix your own insecurities. Yeah.
Like that entire line of thinking is rooted in this idea of insecurity, this idea of like feeling like you need to look at something outside of yourself to feel more like yourself. Like I only feel beautiful and desirable when somebody else is desiring me, yet that doesn't change how you look yesterday or how you're going to look tomorrow, right?
like it is just this feeling of that gratification that we need and what's so fascinating to me and I think this happens in female friendships a lot from the way a lot of my female friends have described it but also just all friendships is how that turns into this concept of competition again like even when not directly expressed you know I think what's interesting about Jacqueline's
character is like, I think she's genuinely doesn't view the situation and the argument like she did anything wrong. Because that is the way a lot of these people think when they have this inadvertent, like, nature of just doing it to validate themselves. And, again, we see how this is, like, really at her own detriment.
Like, she has this very loving boyfriend back home that we see her husband, that we see her on the phone with, blah, blah, blah. And everything she said about how crazy they were for each other is so true. And that, I think, was very, very interesting to explore. I also loved when they kind of, like,
We're always kind of talking shit about each other a little bit or at the very least like expressing discontentment with a lot of the choices or like things they said. And I actually read this article recently or so that was so interesting talking about how there is a study that says that like friends who are.
comfortable kind of like roasting each other or insulting each other to their face, generally have longer lasting friendships. And I think it's very much because of things like this. Because when you don't feel this ability to like express those things fully, they fester within you.
And when you don't have a place to, you know, like put that, seek that out, it turns into, again, this resentment, this competition, this rage. And that is where these three women are kind of constantly asking at one another in different ways. You know, two of them are talking shit about the other girl's political beliefs.
And the other two were talking shit about how the girl kind of is, you know, she doesn't look as good as she used to. And then the other two were talking about how, oh my gosh, she's so obsessed with male attention, blah, blah, blah, right? Like they're always just like nitpicking at each other. But again, like what is so interesting about these three is that dialogue.
But something I found fascinating was, did you know that the actors of The Three Girls and the White Lotus thought that their characters were going to be the disappointment of the season? I was at this panel with HBO where a lot of the cast was there, and they were talking about this, how when they all got their scripts, they were reading through and were like, oh, my God, this other line has –
uh wealth this incest there's partying there's rick and chelsea who are getting in gunfights blah blah blah like when they were reading all these parts they all three of these women felt like theirs was so plain so ordinary yet it's actually that simplicity i think that made it so interesting because we all felt like one of those women at some point in the thing right Right.
And they're all flawed for different ways. Jacqueline has this feeling like she needs validation from other people, from men, from friendships. Whereas Kate is just this pacifist that can never really pick a side, never really wants conflict, kind of always sides with all people. And it's very much this like a friend to everyone feels like a friend to no one.
And then Lori just has this like really built up. feeling of self-pity and resentment that she really projects onto other people and onto other situations. And she's constantly blaming these things outside of herself or the way she's feeling or why she's this, why she's that.
And what's fascinating to me about all of these three women and like the way their story ends is that they don't resolve these conflicts. What happens is that they just accept each other's flaws and decide, yeah, I still love you. Yeah. And I think that is really a beautiful thing. Because everyone you're going to meet in your fucking life has some sort of flaw. It is inevitable.
And if you really want to cherish that person and have them in your life for decades, every friend is going to have some sort of fatal flaw. And you've got to be able to look at that thing and be like, yeah, there's going to be sometimes we bite heads on this thing or the way you handle these sorts of situations really bothers me. But... the other 99% of you is so great that I understand that.
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