Oprah Winfrey

We're going from one role to another role.

And if we can look at them through the lens of mattering, that offers us a pathway through the transition.

So if you're going through a painful transition, look for role models.

Look for people who have gone through something similar.

And gotten through it.

And gotten through it.

Use their life as almost like a blueprint for yourself, a little map.

And then there's one other thing that I write about in the book is the power of invitation.

So it is accepting invitations and issuing invitations.

When we are going through something hard, we are often reluctant to reach out to people or to accept because we feel like we have to get our lives together.

But there's research called the beautiful mess effect, which is the idea that we think we need to be perfect to be loved.

But actually, when we are going through something hard, when we are authentic and open about it, that it actually brings people closer to us because they trust us more.

They think we're authentic.

So if you are going through something hard, don't wait.

They do.

They see you as a human, someone they can trust.

And if you are not getting invitations, I interviewed this woman who went through a horrible divorce, didn't want to be a fifth wheel out to dinner.

And so she was complaining to her therapist that her social life was zero.

And the therapist said, then you start hosting dinner parties.

You start inviting your girlfriends to your house.