Paul C. Brunson

Some just don't say anything back to me.

Right.

Others are like checking in, like, what's going on?

What's going on?

You know, so just that it's interesting how a label.

can help to ease your mind about something.

And so I am walking away distinctly with that.

But then also maybe number three is now how to manage that with the CARP CMEs that he was talking about, these interactions, but making sure that they're consistent and reliable, predictable.

Now I understand how I can use that one tool just to help to manage those relationships.

Because ultimately, this is also something that I learned with Dr. Levine is by not doing that, I am causing severe pain.

the highest level of brain, well, he didn't use the word trauma, but the highest level of pain that I can give to someone I love by not interacting with them.

I felt guilty and I would always question, why am I doing this?

Why am I acting this way to my best friends?

Why am I doing that?

And I was thinking, okay, something's wrong with me.

Like, or maybe does it mean that I don't really like them?

Like, what is it?

You know, and I would feel guilty and shame, but now I understand this is the way I'm programmed.

You know, and that just understanding that I'm programmed that way reduces the guilt and the shame.

And then having the tool further reduces any anxiety that I have around it.