Rob O'Neill

I was burning my lips.

I don't know if you can get a purple heart for burning your lips, but that's all I did.

What other missions do you think about a lot these days?

Um...

The first few – I mean, there's the ones that went bad.

Yeah.

Well, and most of them didn't go – there's a guy I think of –

When you say you... People are capable of sharing a moment.

It's almost like you lived your entire life, and so did you, to get to a moment.

I don't think I've mentioned this one before, but it's not... The first mission, the one where I blew up the door, and actually a dude saw it, and he fell, I fell, whatever.

We get inside, the kids are asleep.

I ran into a guy from Saudi Arabia, a big fat guy.

And if you're in Afghanistan...

Around 2005, from Saudi Arabia, you're not there to teach Arabic.

You're Al-Qaeda, not even the Taliban.

And so I roll up on this dude, unarmed.

He's wearing a shirt that says – he doesn't speak English.

This guy's wearing a shirt that says it's not a beer belly.

It's a fuel tank for a sex machine.

I laughed at his shirt, and I just – I thought, you're definitely not going to die because that's funny.