Ronny Chieng (performing a bit)

Holy shit. I can't change who I am. That's not... True, okay? Everyone can change. I mean, maybe we can make you beautiful. Maybe add some healthcare subsidies, money for children. Oh, kids? I don't know. Okay, well, let's start with something smaller then. How about you, I don't know, maybe try taking off your glasses. Wow. Wow, yeah, see? And maybe tussle your hair a little?

Holy shit. I can't change who I am. That's not... True, okay? Everyone can change. I mean, maybe we can make you beautiful. Maybe add some healthcare subsidies, money for children. Oh, kids? I don't know. Okay, well, let's start with something smaller then. How about you, I don't know, maybe try taking off your glasses. Wow. Wow, yeah, see? And maybe tussle your hair a little?

Wow, maybe you can be beautiful. Hey, you know what? Why don't you tell me three things you like about yourself?

Wow, maybe you can be beautiful. Hey, you know what? Why don't you tell me three things you like about yourself?

God, I hate you, Ronnie. I'm going to the Senate. All right, the big, beautiful bill, everyone. When we come back, we go to South Sudan, so don't go away.

God, I hate you, Ronnie. I'm going to the Senate. All right, the big, beautiful bill, everyone. When we come back, we go to South Sudan, so don't go away.

Welcome back to The Daily Show. If you're mad that President Trump is deporting immigrants back to their home country without due process, well, calm down. He's also deporting them to other countries without due process.

Welcome back to The Daily Show. If you're mad that President Trump is deporting immigrants back to their home country without due process, well, calm down. He's also deporting them to other countries without due process.

The Trump administration is accused of violating another court order on immigration by putting eight migrants on a plane from Texas. Immigration attorneys say they were deported to South Sudan, which is a war-torn country where the State Department advises Americans not to travel.

The Trump administration is accused of violating another court order on immigration by putting eight migrants on a plane from Texas. Immigration attorneys say they were deported to South Sudan, which is a war-torn country where the State Department advises Americans not to travel.

Wow, South Sudan. The only place more depressing than South Sudan is Madison Square Garden. That's the last nice Knicks game, right? Yeah. For the internet, we lost. So these deportations might seem cruel to some and legally dubious to others. But that's why the Trump administration released this video to show you that they can be also exciting and cool. Deportation rocks! Hail Satan!

Wow, South Sudan. The only place more depressing than South Sudan is Madison Square Garden. That's the last nice Knicks game, right? Yeah. For the internet, we lost. So these deportations might seem cruel to some and legally dubious to others. But that's why the Trump administration released this video to show you that they can be also exciting and cool. Deportation rocks! Hail Satan!

You know, that's the funny thing about being a musician. I mean, one minute you think you're gonna be the next Jimi Hendrix, and the next minute your songs are being used in a video titled Gestapo Hype Reel 3.0. But if you would prefer not to be deported to heavy metal, you can always leave on your own. And in fact, if you self-deport, Trump will sweeten the deal.

You know, that's the funny thing about being a musician. I mean, one minute you think you're gonna be the next Jimi Hendrix, and the next minute your songs are being used in a video titled Gestapo Hype Reel 3.0. But if you would prefer not to be deported to heavy metal, you can always leave on your own. And in fact, if you self-deport, Trump will sweeten the deal.

The Department of Homeland Security conducting its first self-deport operation called Project Homecoming. 64 illegal immigrants making the choice to self-deport back to their home countries.

The Department of Homeland Security conducting its first self-deport operation called Project Homecoming. 64 illegal immigrants making the choice to self-deport back to their home countries.

Officials handed out food and children's toys for each ride, and each person was given a $1,000 stipend for their cooperation.

Officials handed out food and children's toys for each ride, and each person was given a $1,000 stipend for their cooperation.

What? $1,000 and a sack lunch for self-deporting? What idiot would take that offer? What stupid... Ahem.

What? $1,000 and a sack lunch for self-deporting? What idiot would take that offer? What stupid... Ahem.