Ruth

September, yeah.

And we got engaged at the end of August.

um I had to go no contact it was toxic it was unhealthy it was we both knew it was over so like neither one of us wanted to call it so when I finally called it it was almost like a spiral happened and you couldn't handle it so I was getting like 200 phone calls a day like

back to back and then i have a work phone and like he would flip between the two and then i was getting emails like paragraph long emails and text messages and facebook messages any message like any sort of avenue that you could message someone through it was just to the point where like i was having panic attacks over it because i was like i need you to go yeah okay that makes sense so good you know and i'm assuming your fiancee knows that story

Yeah, he was there for a lot of that.

Yeah, it came from me.

Like I knew that I had to go no contact because.

That's true.

And we normally have great communication.

We're very open and like,

I should have like first instinct when I saw the email was just, I should text him right now and like, let him know.

But he was at work and I was like, Oh, I'm not going to do that.

Well, as it works, like I'll wait till I get home.

And then it just kind of snowballed into, I deleted it and it doesn't exist.

But then I,

talking to one of my friends and I asked my parents, I was like, what do I do?

My dad's like, you're not still talking to him.

So what does it matter?

And I was like, I don't know.

I just don't want him to like feel some type of way that he still had access to my, like to me.