Ryan Shelton

Mm-hmm.

But, yeah, it's when you lose control of your emotions and feel this anger that is when I lie in bed regretting it.

It's handy that you're not putting like a time limit on when that legendary status will be brought in because the future could be like... 20 years.

Yeah, every 20 years we assess all the people and see who can be legends.

We induct one person every 20 years.

Yeah, could be Inga.

Yeah, I was very moved by that reflection, as you've just heard.

But it's really interesting hearing it back after, God, it's been probably six or seven months since that episode.

And I noticed something in myself there that is very typical of me of continuing to give myself a bit of a hard time about everything.

And I talk in that reflection about how my psychologist had identified that I'm trying to be the perfect parent a lot of the time.

And I think something that I haven't recognized in that, that I didn't recognize in that reflection is to be the kind of parent I want to be, which is sort of flexible, like rather than meeting a parenting challenge by getting angry, I would rather be sort of flexible and funny and be able to turn that situation into an opportunity for, say, connection rather than anger.

Yeah.

that requires a lot of energy and requires a lot of mental acuity and flexibility.

And I think just the realistic fact about parenting is sometimes you've had four hours sleep and you just don't have the mental energy to actually be able to do it.

So then to be harsh on myself for not having that energy

Seems unnecessary.

I don't think getting angry is the right response either, but I think I just need to lower my expectations of what I'm capable of on those days.

And because I think the anger comes from not just the situation, but also the judgment on yourself for not being able to control the situation.

So I think it's just something that I have been thinking about but listening to that clip really makes it quite clear that I need to just lower the expectations of what I'm capable of depending and go, you slept for... Like right now, I slept for about five and a half hours last night.

And so if I get home tonight and the kids are, for whatever reason, being challenging...