Spencer Matthews

There were unusual circumstances surrounding my brother Michael and his death.

We certainly felt that his death could have absolutely been avoided, and so I carried a lot of hatred towards people.

Marrying an amazing woman who I want to be better for has been very helpful, but I could just see the relationship slipping if I didn't make an actual change.

Two world record Ironman attempts, and we went from London to Arizona to Cape Town to Perth to Dubai to Rio and finished in Antarctica.

These things make me feel really alive.

Cape Town, it was the first time that the challenge felt very dangerous and that it could come to an end.

Heart thumping, hyperventilating, lost sense in my arms and legs.

I was just thinking about my kids.

What a stupid way to die.

But, you know, I've been incredibly lucky to have people that I admire in my own family, especially my brothers, Michael and James.

I want my family and friends to know that I could handle this.

Nearly cried.

I was so nearly there, I thought, how can I suppress these feelings?

Thank you.

I got back just a few days ago.

I think we finished around then.

Unbelievable.

Been back for 48 hours or something.

I feel much better than I thought I would.

It's not so much a physical feeling, but very proud.