Stephan Speaks

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So, just keep pushing forward, keep doing what you need to do, continue to be open to whatever you need to improve upon. Never get in a mindset of well, I'm great and the world is just ridiculous. It's like no, no, no. What can I continue to do better? What can I tweak? What adjustments can I make? Because sometimes it is a matter of a small adjustment that will make a huge difference.

So, just keep pushing forward, keep doing what you need to do, continue to be open to whatever you need to improve upon. Never get in a mindset of well, I'm great and the world is just ridiculous. It's like no, no, no. What can I continue to do better? What can I tweak? What adjustments can I make? Because sometimes it is a matter of a small adjustment that will make a huge difference.

And I think as long as you keep an open mind and you don't view not having the result right now as a defeat, right? You understand this is a process, you will get to your destination at some point.

And I think as long as you keep an open mind and you don't view not having the result right now as a defeat, right? You understand this is a process, you will get to your destination at some point.

Just go to my site, Stefan Speak Shop or my YouTube, you know, check me out. Hopefully I can connect with more and more people and just help as many people as possible. Find love and find just a better overall life. It's not just about relationship or at least it starts relationship with self, you know, and getting that right and everything else falling in place. Well, for me, self and God.

Just go to my site, Stefan Speak Shop or my YouTube, you know, check me out. Hopefully I can connect with more and more people and just help as many people as possible. Find love and find just a better overall life. It's not just about relationship or at least it starts relationship with self, you know, and getting that right and everything else falling in place. Well, for me, self and God.

All right, so number one, lack of healing. Lack of healing because lack of healing probably leads them to choosing the wrong person to begin with. which is the foundation for disaster because at that point everything else I'm about to mention you can't really work it out with this person because you're just not in alignment with them it's not a good fit.

All right, so number one, lack of healing. Lack of healing because lack of healing probably leads them to choosing the wrong person to begin with. which is the foundation for disaster because at that point everything else I'm about to mention you can't really work it out with this person because you're just not in alignment with them it's not a good fit.

And so, a lot of people are trying to make things work with someone they just can't match up with properly, you know. Is that trauma bonding or what is that? How is that playing a part?

And so, a lot of people are trying to make things work with someone they just can't match up with properly, you know. Is that trauma bonding or what is that? How is that playing a part?

Some of it is trauma bonding some of it is individual... So, what's happening is this phenomena if you want to call it that people are choosing individuals that are quote, unquote good enough to be with but they don't really make them feel deeply about them. Because if I'm a man or a woman and I've been hurt before and I've been hurt when I let my heart out completely I fear being that vulnerable.

Some of it is trauma bonding some of it is individual... So, what's happening is this phenomena if you want to call it that people are choosing individuals that are quote, unquote good enough to be with but they don't really make them feel deeply about them. Because if I'm a man or a woman and I've been hurt before and I've been hurt when I let my heart out completely I fear being that vulnerable.

So, now You don't really ever learn how to not feel deeply about someone if they're just that person but people learn who I can deal with and not fall deeply for. So, okay, I can be with this person and maintain emotional control they don't take me there so I don't ever feel like I'm too vulnerable in this situation. Do you think a lot of women choose the safe guy as opposed to the right guy?

So, now You don't really ever learn how to not feel deeply about someone if they're just that person but people learn who I can deal with and not fall deeply for. So, okay, I can be with this person and maintain emotional control they don't take me there so I don't ever feel like I'm too vulnerable in this situation. Do you think a lot of women choose the safe guy as opposed to the right guy?

Absolutely and the safe choice is almost always if not always the wrong choice. Oh, man. Why is a safe choice always the wrong choice for a woman? So, think about it in order for it to be safe it means you are not deeply invested. You may be invested it may be deep compared to certain people's perceptions of deep but it's not as deep as you know you can go.

Absolutely and the safe choice is almost always if not always the wrong choice. Oh, man. Why is a safe choice always the wrong choice for a woman? So, think about it in order for it to be safe it means you are not deeply invested. You may be invested it may be deep compared to certain people's perceptions of deep but it's not as deep as you know you can go.