Stephanie Harrison

They shape our attachment style, which influences every relationship that we have in our lives.

They teach us how to regulate our emotions or not regulate our emotions, and that impacts every moment of every day.

And so at a very basic biological level, no one is a human being alone.

Paradoxically, the most effective strategy that people can use when they're lonely is to go out and help somebody else.

We require each other in order to be able to develop and then to function.

Because what happens is when you're lonely in your brain, basically it shifts into something that's called self-preservation mode, where it doesn't want to connect with people.

And then as we go out into the world,

none of us are able to do anything by ourselves, right?

The only reason you and I are able to have this conversation is because there are people out there who have created these tools and platforms and the internet and the systems that make it possible for you and I to get on the phone together.

And so a lot of the loneliness epidemic that we're seeing right now is because we're all focused on ourselves and we're all really nervous about getting rejected and worried about how people see us.

And

And then that makes it really hard to connect.

the more that we start to recognize our dependence upon one another, the more we can see that actually this need of each other isn't a flaw the way it's been painted in our world, where dependence is almost like a bad word in a way, but dependence on each other is what enables independence.

But when you're helping somebody, when you go out with the intention of saying, let me go out and help Stephanie with this problem that I know she's having,

It's much safer, right?

Most people don't reject help.

It's an easy way to start establishing connection.

And so by doing that, you're able to say, look, I'm not alone.

In fact, there are people out here who need me.

And then independence then furthers dependence.