Steve Herz
speaker
95 appearances
1 recordings
1 series
first heard May 2025
last heard May 2025
Steve Herz’s voice in public audio — every appearance, attributed to the second.
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Appearances
There's nothing you can do with it unless I tell you something actionable. So this is what I try to do is make it actionable. So let's just take that 85% and create an acronym around it that we can work on. It will have a report card and metrics. That's called AWE. The subtitle of my book is called Using Authority, Warmth, and Energy, AWE, to Get Exceptional Results.
I think that if you look at the people in your life that you believe, first of all, have those precursor technical skills and are thriving, most of them fit into this category of being able to communicate stylistically and have a sense of authority about themselves. We perceive them as, you know, very competent. We perceive them as trustworthy because they have the warmth and connectability.
We want to go along with their ideas because it's a certain energetic quality to them that energizes us. And those are the only things that really matter in our communication. And if we can do that, if we can make people understand that we're good at what we do, you can trust me. I'm going to get the job done for you. And I make you feel good around me.
You're going to have all the influence in the world you need. That's it.
Well, you're correct. I just want to repeat, though, for the audience and for you, that that is only because... you are going to be competing and working alongside other people like yourself that have mastered the technical part of it. I use this dental example. If you needed a filling tomorrow for a tooth, you had a cavity, you could call up 10 dentists, probably 100 dentists,
And they all know how to do a filling, right? And that's not going to be the distinguishing factor of why you go to one dentist versus another. You probably wouldn't even know who's going to do a better filling anyway. And that's true of a lot of the services that we end up using in our lives. And so it's not that the technical part isn't important.
It's just a necessary prerequisite to get you a seat at the table. And I think very little else.
Do you mind if I say this? Read the book. No, no. Yeah. I mean, obviously, please read the book. But what we do talk about is, first of all, I think it's understanding what your strengths and weaknesses are. And when you... We have an opportunity. It's fascinating.
In the last few months, one of the hopefully good byproducts of this pandemic has been this Zoom culture where we get to record ourselves if we want to, and we can go back and listen and look at ourselves and take note of our communication. And I think most of us would find that we have these blind spots, these weaknesses, the way that we're communicating.
And unless you're walking around with someone who's telling you 24-7, hey, Steve, hey, Heather, stop doing that, stop doing that, and you find a way to actually change it, you're going to continue to embed those bad habits in your behavior. And we don't have people that tell us these things. That's why I say don't take yes for an answer. And so
The immediate things like kind of the low hanging fruit, I would say, of actual things you could do to have more authority is stand up straight, sit up straight. Have some physicality to your body language. Finish your sentences, Heather. Finish your words. So many people just trail off at the end of their words or they have a sing-song delivery or a high-pitched voice that's artificially high.
So go on the internet and you can have many different free resources to figure out if you have a properly placed pitch with your voice. Enunciate. And if you have a good voice... If you don't have a sing-song delivery, if you finish your words, then you will seem and you will be more authoritative. And another really simple thing is do not use filler words. End them from your vocabulary.
Um's, you know's, like's. They're easy to fix. I could teach it to you in probably an hour. And if you can get rid of just those filler words and use a pregnant pause and have more inflection in your voice because you're not using those filler words, man, you're going to be so much more captivating.
filler getting rid of filler words or how you're standing or how you're if you're enunciating or not right because this is this is a question of the substance versus the style substance is important it gets you seated at the table if you don't study dentistry you're not getting a dental job if you don't study engineering you can get an engineering job but once you've done that
and you have the resume, look, you're getting the interview. Whatever job you're applying for, who else is coming in for the interview? People with very similar resumes to you. So the substance is going to seem very similar, almost, if not completely indistinguishable to the person reading them. Now, you've been on both sides of this equation, so have I. I mean, you tell me.
I can't read 10 resumes if I'm recruiting somebody and tell you the difference between those 10 resumes. And I've been doing this, I'm in this field for 30 years and I can't do it.
It's a great question. And it's been, I would say, the number one pushback I've gotten about this whole messaging in the book is, well, you can't teach warmth. Some people are warm, some people aren't. So I fight back by saying, I'm not going to teach you or convince you you're going to be the warmest person in the room.
But what I will teach you to do is to be a little bit better every day than you were the day before. And I'll also focus on these tiny little granular things you're doing, many of which you're just self-sabotaging. And that's going to hurt your warmth. So I'll give you an example. I'll pick myself here.
When I started writing this book, I had two really bad communication habits that killed my warmth. And luckily, I'm married to a woman who never gives me yes for an answer. And I love her for that. And so she pointed out to me, hey, you know what? Big shot, you're teaching communication.
Do you know that when you go to cocktail parties and you're around people, you stand there with your arms folded often when you talk to people? Well, what a terrible habit that is. And I said, wow, that's great advice. And then I just found that I was having a hard time changing it.
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