Thais Gibson

These are like these huge wounds and triggers in their relationships.

And they need very specific things in relationships.

They need more validation, approval.

They really like certainty.

If somebody cancels plans with them, they really want to know, OK, you're canceling plans, but tell me when I'm going to see you next.

And then they can sort of rest and feel comfortable and safe.

And so they end up in situations where they sometimes struggle with their boundaries growing up.

They often end up in situations as well where because they're so busy making sure that everybody else is good, they kind of forget about themselves and they put themselves on the back burner.

So anxious attachment styles as adults, they often also are very much invested in and attracted to emotionally unavailable people.

And that becomes really problematic in different ways.

Yeah, so they become attracted to emotionally unavailable people because, and I guess maybe I'll give a little bit more of a backstory to this.

For me, I originally got into this work because I had a turbulent childhood and actually got addicted to painkillers after a knee surgery at 15.

And I really struggled with about a six-year daily use of opioids and tried inpatient rehab and outpatient rehab and had all of these things come up.

And what was really interesting is,

I felt like life was really hard and I felt like relationships were really hard at that point.

And I tried a lot of things that weren't really working.

And I was in school for psychology.

And like maybe on the outside, my life looked like you're doing well, you're okay.

But on the inside, I was like a mess, like I was really hurting.

And I was in a psych class and I was seriously thinking like, I think I need to leave school.