Thais Gibson

And so fearful avoidance grew up not knowing what version they're going to get.

And so they have this really interesting conditioning where they really want love and closeness, but they're also scared of it.

They feel threatened by it.

And so as adults, they have a lot of these kind of anxious leaning wounds where they're afraid of being abandoned and alone.

And they feel like everything's always on them and they carry the weight of the world on their shoulders.

And they're usually like the caretakers in all their relationships.

And

People always go to them to solve the problem because they usually that's their conditioning growing up.

They had to be that way.

And then they're usually really tough and strong individuals and they're great under pressure, but they feel a lot of internal emotional distress because one day they feel anxious and another day they're avoided.

Another day they're like, oh, you're going to trap me or you're if I lean on you, I'm going to be helpless.

I can't rely on other people.

And they're scared of being powerless.

And they usually have a big wound of betrayal.

And we found this from a lot of our research.

And the betrayal wound isn't necessarily just that they think somebody's going to cheat or lie.

It could be that.

But it's also like,

geez, I like you now and you like me now, but how could I possibly trust the future?

Because if you grow up in an environment where if your parents are so unpredictable and they're crazy and you don't know how to really deal with that, it's like, well, geez, if my own parents couldn't be trustworthy, how am I going to trust somebody who came into my life as a stranger?