Tim Dillon

You think it's all going to be your best friends eating spicy tuna crispy rice talking about your honeymoon?

The fuck it is, sister.

Your husband has fake tits on and he's jerking his cock to a cam girl.

And you're shooting your dog in the face.

And now you're the leader of the Department of Homeland Security.

What the fuck happened?

Who knows?

You're making plastic surgery appointments in between state-sanctioned murders.

That's what life is for real.

That's what it is for real.

It's not eating spicy tuna crispy rice with your girlfriend going, oh my God, it was amazing.

The hotel was amazing.

It was amazing.

It was so beautiful.

So nice.

We had dinner on the beach and we were worried because it was windy during the day, but then the wind calmed down and then they bring out

Like there was like a literal band and they played music on the beach and they, they were like, get up and dance.

And you know, like Jeff, Jeff's like, he's like shy.

Like people don't know that about Jeff.

Cause he seems really outgoing, but he's really shy.