Tom Ballard

LAUGHTER

All right, so we've got reform, we've got restore, we've got repeat.

I'm launching reboot.

Reboot is all about turning Britain off and on again and starting from scratch.

We're going to campaign to have the British landmass reattached to the European continent just as it was 8,000 years ago, and we're going to retrace our steps and figure out where the f*** it all went wrong.

They're mingled.

I believe the scientific phrase is mingled.

I will also say... Maybe they're looking on the inside of the goblin shark.

Maybe they're caught up with all these aesthetic superficial requirements of these f***ing bitchy-ass scientists who are reading these sharks to filth.

It doesn't feel hugely science-y.

It's a disgrace.

Well, it just proves anti-Semitism is rampant throughout the universities.

Disgrace.

Of course, it does beg the question, if you say, you know, this is the ugliest shark on the planet, what's the hottest shark on the planet?

Don't get me wrong, these goblin sharks are no lookers.

They've got faces like dropped pies, but at least their heads aren't the shape of f***ing hammers, unlike some people I can mention.

Screw charity.

Support Tom Ballard.

No, that's a very worthy cause.

Please do that.