Vanessa Marin

Don't wear that one.

And I thought, oh, no, this is how we're giving feedback in the bedroom, too, is it's just easier for our weird human brain sometimes to go to the negative and give that negative feedback.

But imagine you're with your wife and you're trying to be intimate with her and she's, don't do that.

That's terrible.

That feels awful.

You're going to freak out in that moment, right?

You're going to feel super embarrassed.

You're not going to want to do anything new or different.

You're just going to kind of freeze in that moment.

So we can't give negative feedback.

It just doesn't work.

Instead, we need to do positive.

So I'll give you an example.

So one of the things that we hear from women most often about sex with men is women tell us, we want you to slow down.

Like, women love being teased.

This is a huge difference between men and women.

For women, a lot of women will say, the tease for me is the best part of sex.

And a lot of men will tell me, don't tease me.

Like, go for the goods.

Like, I want to get it started.