Vanessa Van Edwards

Okay. You walk to the bathroom, you walk to the bar, you walk by them. Hey. Hey. like that because look by the way this is for both men and women yeah okay because life is too short to not hey yeah right and there's no pressure if you walk by someone in the gym right and you're like hey even if they have their airpods in if they like you they're gonna be like hey

Okay. You walk to the bathroom, you walk to the bar, you walk by them. Hey. Hey. like that because look by the way this is for both men and women yeah okay because life is too short to not hey yeah right and there's no pressure if you walk by someone in the gym right and you're like hey even if they have their airpods in if they like you they're gonna be like hey

No, it matters. Yeah, it does matter.

No, it matters. Yeah, it does matter.

All right. Okay. So I'll do a good and bad one.

All right. Okay. So I'll do a good and bad one.

That was good. That was good. See, men do good with a downward inflection. So like that downward inflection is good. So if it goes good, the guy's going to be like, hey. If he's not into it, he's going to be like, hey.

That was good. That was good. See, men do good with a downward inflection. So like that downward inflection is good. So if it goes good, the guy's going to be like, hey. If he's not into it, he's going to be like, hey.

No problem. Right? Like, cool. Hey. So it's like the most low pressure way when you're in the grocery store. Even, by the way, if someone has AirPods on, they're still going to see you go. And they're going to take out their earpod. And they're going to be like, hey. So here's the difference, right? So I am using the lowest end of my natural tone.

No problem. Right? Like, cool. Hey. So it's like the most low pressure way when you're in the grocery store. Even, by the way, if someone has AirPods on, they're still going to see you go. And they're going to take out their earpod. And they're going to be like, hey. So here's the difference, right? So I am using the lowest end of my natural tone.

This is especially important for women, but everyone. Research finds that we decide how confident someone is within the first 200 milliseconds of hearing them speak. 200 milliseconds. That means the most important word you can say really is, hey, that's it. You've just signaled your confidence, your confidence, not confidence. It's specifically confidence. Okay. So what does that mean?

This is especially important for women, but everyone. Research finds that we decide how confident someone is within the first 200 milliseconds of hearing them speak. 200 milliseconds. That means the most important word you can say really is, hey, that's it. You've just signaled your confidence, your confidence, not confidence. It's specifically confidence. Okay. So what does that mean?

We are listening for relaxation and breath in the vocal cords. So right now I'm working really hard to use the lowest end of my natural voice because I know that people are listening and I want to keep them relaxed. When I get nervous, I tend to go a little higher in my vocal tone. I might get a little bit more vocal fry, and I might sound a little bit more like this.

We are listening for relaxation and breath in the vocal cords. So right now I'm working really hard to use the lowest end of my natural voice because I know that people are listening and I want to keep them relaxed. When I get nervous, I tend to go a little higher in my vocal tone. I might get a little bit more vocal fry, and I might sound a little bit more like this.

Now, if I were to do the entire interview in this tone of voice, it would drive you crazy. Absolutely, 100%. Horrible. It's infectious. We catch it. We don't like to be around people where we could catch their anxiety. We don't want to catch their anxiety. They've even found that we match... the voice resonance of the most important person in the room.

Now, if I were to do the entire interview in this tone of voice, it would drive you crazy. Absolutely, 100%. Horrible. It's infectious. We catch it. We don't like to be around people where we could catch their anxiety. We don't want to catch their anxiety. They've even found that we match... the voice resonance of the most important person in the room.

So when they tested people, they found that they, subconsciously, their resonance matched whoever's most important person in the room, their own resonance.

So when they tested people, they found that they, subconsciously, their resonance matched whoever's most important person in the room, their own resonance.

Okay. So luckily one is now that you know it, it's going to be very easy for you to hear yourself do it. So at home, if you wouldn't mind trying this with me, I want you to hear the highest end of your range versus the lowest end of your range. Everyone has a natural range. So first let's start with the highest. So take a deep breath and say hello at the top of your breath. Hello. Hello.

Okay. So luckily one is now that you know it, it's going to be very easy for you to hear yourself do it. So at home, if you wouldn't mind trying this with me, I want you to hear the highest end of your range versus the lowest end of your range. Everyone has a natural range. So first let's start with the highest. So take a deep breath and say hello at the top of your breath. Hello. Hello.