Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
KDWB.
Ooh, that sounds really good. Chips and salsa or chips and queso? While you're thinking about that one, I've got a keyword for you. This is the last day that our show is doing, and I think it continues this weekend. So play the game. Win that trip.
Let's take a trip. Your chance to win a trip to Los Angeles to see Sabrina Carpenter at one of her sold-out shows happens now on KDWB. Talk back the keyword please. That's please on our iHeartRadio app.
So go do that, even if you've done it before. Every time you do it is another chance to win that trip, which we'll draw for in a couple of days on KDWB. Good luck. Shayla, we've been talking. Have your ears been ringing? We've been talking about you, Shayla.
yeah good morning morning so shayla was i think it was a couple of days ago we heard from her we said we gotta have you tell your story on the radio shayla i don't want to take it away or steal your thunder but you were done with your marriage you were out the door tell me about what happened in the process and what's going on now okay yeah i was i was thinking about divorcing my husband um
You know, he's like, he's fine. He's this kind of dull, kind of boring. And I started thinking, like, hmm, what if there was, like, you know, somebody else out there that if I was single, if I was free, if I was able to figure out who I'd want to be with,
uh i kind of thought that i would just be looking for the same man as my husband oh okay so you're making like a list of like qualities that you want in a man or something if you ended up leaving him yeah yeah like you know if i i would want somebody who's like a steady eddie okay that's my husband you know like i would i would want somebody that's involved with
With my son, our son, my husband coaches t-ball for our son. Like he's, you know, he's, we don't fight. We don't have any like financial problems, but I was just like, you know, I was thinking about this and I was like, instead of going through all the divorce, if you meet somebody that, you know, kind of checks all the boxes and you think, oh, that could work.
Just think, like, maybe don't get divorced. Maybe your husband's fine and, you know, stay with him.
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Chapter 2: Why was Shayla considering divorce?
They're involved with the kids. You had said, you didn't say this now because maybe you got shy about it. You said you want a guy with a sex drive, but not somebody who wants it all the time.
Yes.
Okay. All right. So you want a guy who's like, you don't want a guy who doesn't have any kind of a sex drive, but you don't want a guy who's like, you know, you can't even like bend over the kitchen sink or empty the trash without him being like, Hey, let's go. So is that normal that way?
Yeah.
Normal that way. So he's like, yeah, has the drive, but not all the time. So then you start to realize if you were out dating and you met somebody on hinge that was a steady Eddie, maybe a little bit dull.
Hmm.
wasn't you know like always you know pestering you for the loving you'd be like this guy's quite a catch oh wait that's my husband i already have that but yeah here comes mr mr cynic over here i just feel like something to say i should never be in a thought process where i'm like maybe i should get a divorce because if i get to that point then i don't think there is saving it i think you know if you think you should get a divorce then it should happen
Though I disagree because like there's so many like chances when you're even in just a relationship prior to marriage where you're like, is this the one right for me? And it's a lot of self-sabotage.
You said it right there before marriage. When you when you marry somebody, you make vows to commit for better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, for all those things.
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Chapter 3: What qualities does Shayla look for in a partner?
We'll come back in a second, and we'll talk more about this in a little bit on KDWB. One hour commercial free, including our favorite part of the week, no phone screener Friday. What are you going to call it?
It's this radio show that's kind of sketchy. The Dave Ryan Show on KDWB.
I would not listen to this radio station alone in the dark. That's for sure. Oh, sketchy. Where have you been, Jenny? We've been missing you. We wonder where you were. And Bailey said you're probably taking a big nap. No. You did. Yeah, I said, is she pooping? And Bailey said, she's taking a big fat poop. Yeah, and then he's like, Bailey, disgusting. And I'm like, you said it.
I thought I had till 7-19, so I thought I was right on time. I guess I was just a little, my phone must be behind. So let's get back to the action here. Yes. We talked to a woman a minute ago, Shayla, I believe her name was? Yes. Really, really interesting take on divorce because she said, hey, I've been married for a while. My husband's boring. He's like a steady Eddie. He coaches T-ball.
He's, you know, a good, you know, husband, whatever. He's just boring. And she started to go through like divorce and like thinking about divorce and working it through in her mind and going out and seeing what she could get as far as a new partner and meeting people. And the idea is maybe kind of exciting to her. So then she started thinking about, God, well, what if I met a guy?
I really would, if I met a guy that had all those boxes, like kind of boring and steady Eddie, good with the kids, once had to have a sex life, but it's not crazed about it. And then she realized that's what her husband is. So then she said, I am not going to get a divorce. So, and I thought that was really interesting because if you were divorced and single and
And you found somebody who was just like, I mean, the good qualities. Yeah, because everybody has bad qualities, too. Except they're boring. Maybe boring's not. I'd rather have a boring relationship than somebody who was full of drama. I had to bail him out of prison and take him to Betty Ford and all, you know. I just, okay.
So I'm talking to somebody named Angela and you're kind of in the same boat that she was. Hi, Angela. Tell me your story.
Good morning. Same boat. I mean, I thought of over, you know, I thought about divorce on and off. It's not that I don't love my husband. Of course I love my husband. We've been married over 15 years, but I mean, he's kind of over time, you know, marriage has changed and he just doesn't want to go out. He doesn't want to go out to dinner.
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Chapter 4: How does Shayla's perspective on her marriage change?
Trust is hard. I have single friends. The dating world is terrible. So I'm just going to go out. I decided to date myself. Like we should normalize being able to go to dinner by yourself, go do things by yourself. I deserve to be happy. She deserves to be happy. I mean, it doesn't like she does not have, like she's, She doesn't, like, hate him or anything. Stay married. Take yourself out.
Do things for yourself. Nobody deserves your time more than yourself.
Okay, I like that. I really like that, Angela. And you've been married for 15 years, and you said that what has changed? So he used to want to go out to, you know, play darts or go dance or go to a movie or what?
Oh, sure. Absolutely. And it just hasn't. He's more of a homebody now, which is fine, you know? I mean, do I ask for it every night? No, but I mean, there's, I mean... Life just changed. He just wants to be a homebody. He doesn't want to go out on dates. He just doesn't want to go to different sports events or, like you said, go bowling or go out.
with friends or go play bingo he just doesn't want to do that so i'm just i'll do it myself do it yourself are you happy with that and i you don't have to be you know i think you're being real honest but do you kind of wish that it was like man i'm kind of looking around going i wish i had a partner that wanted to go to can can wonderland who wanted to go to nick universe type of thing
I mean, yes and no. But I mean, nowadays it's hard to find somebody. And I mean, I definitely, all the qualities he has, I love everything that he has. So I just feel like if, like she said, if I went and found, I would think about him more than anything. I mean, it's hard to trust and I, you know, and so nobody deserves my time more than me.
You know what I love, Angela, I love that attitude. I'm so glad that you were able to be on the radio with us.
Yeah.
Have a great weekend. You taking yourself out this weekend?
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Chapter 5: What insights do the hosts share about relationships?
My last relationship, though, was like almost five years. And I was in the same position where it was really great at the beginning, obviously. And then he just didn't want to go out anymore. So I continued living my life the way I wanted. And he lived his separate life. And I feel like, yes, take yourself out.
But if your lives like diverge so fully that you're just living two different lives and kind of ships in the night in your home, then like. I would say get a divorce. Go be happy. Seriously. Why? Why commit yourself? I'll give you two thoughts. And I really believe this. You might disagree. If you have to work that hard on a marriage, it ain't a good marriage. Yeah.
You should not have to work that hard on a marriage. If you have to work that hard, marriage is a lot of work. It shouldn't be that much work or it's not a good marriage.
I disagree. I mean, I hope that it doesn't get to that point, but marriage is all about, as far as I know, because I'm not married, but like sacrifice and deciding to always show up. This other text says, I agree with, no, where is it? Vaughn, throughout a long marriage, people fall in and out of love all the time.
The trick is to make the choice to stay even during the seasons when the love might feel lost. However, it's normal to start considering the what ifs during those seasons too. So to be able to navigate the highs, the lows, the ups and downs, the peaks and valleys, but still get through them, I think is important.
I think that's true. I mean, you fight over like, you know, she spent too much money or he bought a new motorcycle without asking or whatever. Then, yeah, those are your peaks and valleys. But if everything is like, ho-hum, I don't say I love you, we don't kiss, we don't do this. You pass each other naked in the hallway and you don't even glance at each other. They start to be a problem.
We thought with the story with Shayla, how she was going to get a divorce. Then she realized if she was dating again and she found somebody just like her husband, it would just be like the piƱa colada song. Ooh. Which goes back to about 1979. Wow. This is probably the biggest Boss Check song we've ever played. But we're going to play it right now. One of the best story songs ever.
You've probably heard it, but listen to the story again and how they got back together. Boss Check. KDWB. One of the greatest story songs of all time.
And the reason we played it was because we were talking about how if you left your partner and then went out on the dating thing and then tried to find somebody and you found somebody who was a lot like your partner, would you go, wow, they're a cat? And then you realize, well, my partner's kind of a catch. And that's what Shayla called in a little while ago with.
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