Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, Superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast where we put the best moments, highlights, and fan-selected clips from all 16 years of The Adam Corolla Show. We have a companion podcast titled Corolla Classics. You can find the ad-free archives exclusively available through Podcast 1. Plus. Check it out and sign up.
And if you'd like to obtain the ad-free archives of The Adam Corolla Show, The Adam and Dr. Drew Show, and get exclusive access to the brand new podcast, Beat It Out, Make sure to check out Adam Carolla's Substack, adamcarolla.substack.com. And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics at adamcarolla.com. Now on to the clips.
Coming up for our first clip today, we have Adam Carolla Show 1284, featuring David Wilde, Alison Rosen, and Brian Bishop from 2014.
All right, David Wilde.
Hashtag catch a name dropper.
That's right. Ace.
I love your show.
Thank you, my friend.
I love Allison's marriage and your show.
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Chapter 2: How can listeners access ad-free archives of the Adam Carolla Show?
The test of time. Allison Rosen, good to see you. Hello, Adam Carolla. Andy Baldwin. You know everything, Baldwin.
A couple people may have requested that on Twitter with the hashtag TopDrop.
Or not. When he says a couple, he means him and Christy. That's right. She doesn't count. I had this thing, a little revelation and a way to go through life. And, you know, as you know. Problem with me writing a book, present me, it's all the decrees. All this is what has to happen when I'm in charge.
And then I get done writing the book and then I discover several thousand things that need to be put in charge. That's why they put changed about. That's why the audio book is always different because it. But I just had an idea. And I thought it was pretty good. Somebody sent me a case of boxer briefs. And I love boxer briefs. It's the best of all worlds.
You really never... The boxer I never understood. It... It's cool in a movie if you guys are down at the lake with the chicks and everyone's going in their underpants, but not cool if you just sort of walk around with your jeans on and your dick's hanging out of the fly, which is constantly open like a compressed pita that's been cut.
It's a weird ā it's like taking one of those old-timey ā not old-timey, but like 60s, 70s plastic rubbery change purse things and kind of ā What the hell were those? I don't know, but they're wildly effective. I don't know who decided we no longer need these. I could use five of those fucking things. But you'd squeeze them and the mouth would go like, feed me, you know?
Every time I got a pair of boxers, I tried to wear boxers because they were cool. They looked cool hanging out, you know, of your denim jeans and stuff like that. But the hole would hang open and your ding-a-ling would come out and much like your throat. Ding-a-ling? Ding-a-ling. What are you, Chuck Berry? That's right. It was my ding-a-ling.
You know, I always say to Dr. Drew, how does your throat know your finger's down its mouth? You're right. How does it feel it? I don't know, but your dick knows when it's hanging out of the fly the same way. Making contact with nothing. Yeah, you get this feeling. And you end up doing this weird move that it's a dude move where you take your index finger and your thumb.
And you pinch two pieces of fabric right next to your groin with both hands, and you do a weird lean back. You do a dip. You kick your ass back. You do like a dip? You do a slight dip with an ass kick, and that gets it back in, but eventually it's coming back out again.
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Chapter 3: What insights are shared about boxer briefs and personal comfort?
That's an attack. That's an attack. The first book Dr. Drew and I wrote many years ago, we were just doing this, I don't know, how do you know you're a lesbian or something? And it's something the lumber rack fell off your Ford F-150. And they changed it to lumbar rack, which is like lower lumbar. And I said, what's a lumbar rack? And they said, I don't know. What's a lumber rack?
And I said, well, a lumber rack at least exists. A lumbar rack, you invented that. That doesn't exist. Lumber racks are racks where you would hold lumber that you might put on a pickup truck, those things you see on top of the pickup truck where they put the lumber on there. And they go, yeah, we didn't know what that was. And I was like ā
Yeah, but so you replaced it with something that doesn't exist yet? And they're like, yeah. And I said, we're going to have to change that back. And they're like, yeah, okay. And then the book came out, and then I turned to that page, and it said lumbar rack. And I thought, what is it you do for a living? Not only did you fuck it up, but we had a conversation. It was circled.
Yeah.
That's the part. Wait till the book goes to printer and the first 5,000 come out and they all say party or party or partner. Partner. Then that's the part where you go into the stratosphere right now. You're disappointed slash upset with a dusting of what exactly are you fucking doing here? If this if you're fucking this up, like what is your other profession?
That's going to be the name of my next book. What do you really do? Because it doesn't seem to be this. This cannot be what you do. Later on when it goes to print and it gets locked off and there's nothing you can do. Oh, it's locked. And there's thousands. Oh, okay.
That's why I got frustrated because I'm reading the audiobook and being like, what the fuck? I thought I had the final version. Well, there you go. Fuck. Oh. On every book I've done, my wife has proofread after me and found 20, 30 things.
Right.
Don't trust them. Don't trust them. Is she employed by the publisher with the sole purpose of proofreading? She's employed by me. No, she's not.
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Chapter 4: How has technology changed since the first Indy 500?
Show me a picture from the first Indy 500, and you'll see a bunch of guys driving cars with wagon wheels, and they had a mechanic who had to pump oil the whole time. Insanity. Okay. We've come a long way. We've come a long way.
When you see laptops and computers and tablets and the kind of shit that we didn't have, that the computing power in my iPhone is more than the entire Gemini project that got us on the moon. Okay, what is it about this that we refuse to understand? I don't know. Where are we in the brain department? I understand. Yeah, there's the 8500 all driving the Chitty Chitty Bang Bang mobiles.
And now their average speed is 225. Back then it was 31 miles an hour. We've come an incredible distance. Why do we argue over the brain? We argue over what motivates kids?
Right. Duckworth says her research shows that grit is actually a better predictor of success than IQ or other measures when it comes to achievements as varied as graduating from West Point or winning the National Spelling Bee.
Chapter 5: What role does grit play in predicting success?
First off, of course, because every human being you know who's successful has that one quality versus Jimmy Kimmel dropped out of Arizona State. But... He's very successful now because he's very dogged and so is everybody else who's very successful.
I remember when Dr. Drew was on, we were sort of debating about is grit the belief that you're nothing or is it high self-esteem? Because to me, what grit and tenacity is oftentimes is like even in the face of rejection, it is this belief that like, no, I can do this thing and I'm going to keep working at it. To me, that is a high self-esteem thing. Yeah.
When the outside world is maybe not giving you the messages that you need to ā that someone else needs those messages to feel encouraged, you're persevering.
That's a good point. I think it is. I think it can be both. I don't think it has to be one or the other. I think there's the ability ā That some people have where they go, oh, I know I can do this. You know, Michael Jordan knew he could play basketball. He gets cut from his freshman team, but he comes back his next year and whatever it is, a growth spurt, however it works.
Then there's another kind of grit, which is a sort of desperation. You know, just I don't want to toil in the sun for a living. I want more out of life than this. And then once your grit pays off a little bit and your tenacity pays off and your intestinal fortitude pays off, then you get to take that and apply it to other things. And so you go, well, I never thought I could do this.
But I'll bet you, Brian, with the experience of writing this book, it has now opened up other worlds for you in terms of if somebody said to you, oh, we want to make a documentary or we want you to write a television pilot or something like that, the kinds of things that you wouldn't have thought you could have done some years ago, you fall back on the book and go, well, I was able to complete that.
Yes.
And it's not just things that I didn't think I could do. To Allison's point, it's things that I would like to do. I would love to do a documentary someday or those kinds of things, and the book is the avenue. When they asked me to write the book, I didn't have an inherent interest in writing a book. I was like, this could be my sort of ticket to do bigger and better things.
But not necessarily a direct ticket, just the idea of going ā I have the experience, the best experience a person can have, a human being can have, is I have an idea or somebody else has an idea. Brian, I want you to write a book. Okay. First, shut up. First impulse. Okay. No. Brian, I want you to write a book. First impulse.
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Chapter 6: How do we handle discomfort in parenting?
Oh, shit. You know, how's that going to work? That's 300 pages. I spent my scholastic career dodging writing things. And if, you know, the teacher said we need a book report, my hand would go up and go, what's the minimum amount? 11 pages. Does that count the cover and the bibliography? And what else does in the back? Also, what's a bibliography? Yes. Thank you. Point is this.
How's this guy going to write 300 pages? So it's your first impulse. And then your second impulse is like, OK, I think I can start plugging away on this or I'm going to find a way to start plugging away. And then at some point you fast forward to the satisfaction a man feels when his book is being butchered by an editor and he's reading the audio.
I just did that today.
There you go. Yeah. And so you now have the concrete experience of beginning, middle, and end. Now, when the next challenge comes along, no one's going to come to you and go, hey, Brian, I got an idea. Why don't you write a second book about your experience with a brain tumor? You're going to go, no. But your second one will be, I don't know, but it will be something. President You.
It will probably be less... My life is a sidekick. It'll be less than what you put into this book. Yeah. And then you'll think to yourself, well, I didn't think I could write a book a year ago. That turned out pretty good.
So here goes with the... And now you can put barely anything into your books, just like Adam. That's right. That's right.
Can't do it. Fucking mail it in like I do. So... I try to tell people all the goddamn time, beginning, middle, and end. Beginning, middle, and end. Just finish it. And they go, what's it take to do a documentary? That's how you do a documentary. Finish it. Just finish it, start it, and finish it. I don't know if it's low self-esteem. I don't know if it's high self-esteem or no self-esteem.
It's grit. Start and do it.
I think it may be generational, your question, Allison, and class-oriented. I will say, Adam, I think yours is based on confidence, your success story. You believed you were worthy despite all these people telling you.
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Chapter 7: What does Greg Fitzsimmons think about discipline in sports and trades?
Like the kid goes up to ask what kind of extra credit. Some people can do extra credit at him in class. Some people go up to the teacher afterwards and ask. You know that kid's on the path of success.
That's right. And that was Olga with my thing. But let's not push everyone off. Let's not do the this is how I do it. Let's not repel everybody. And that's what I think is good about any discipline, any sports, any of that coming up.
The other thing ā the other component I agree with you, the other component that both I would imagine carpentry and football have in common is when you screw up, you ā the entire team suffers. In football, you jump off the line. It's either a penalty. Everyone's got to do laps, what have you, depending on game versus practice.
In carpentry or construction, you screw up this one thing, they could spend half a day unfucking it. You know what I mean?
Yes, yes. When you put up ā No, you put up the sheer wall, but you put it up horizontally instead of vertically, or you took the stamp and you put it on the inside instead of on the outside where the inspector could see it, or you use the eight-penny sinkers instead of the ten-penny ring shank, and everyone's going to have to get out the cat's paw and start pulling that thing off.
A whole day of unfucking.
A million times it's happened on a construction site where one guy cut a beam too short, fucked it up, and then everybody got everything ground to a halt and all that. Yeah, in football, it's like one guy goes off sides, everyone runs laps. You learn that super quick, and you just internalize everything. All right, so I like football. I look. I don't.
I don't like the concussion part of football, but I do like the part where you get a ton of discipline and you learn to play with other players and you learn to sacrifice yourself for the better of the team. David Wild? Yes. Wild About Music. And have you caught Rick Springfield yet? I don't believe so.
I haven't checked today, but I will as soon as I get home.
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Chapter 8: How does the conversation shift to the challenges of being a comedian?
But just know they're there. There's an epic dropping coming at some point. Oh, yeah. In a month or so, it's going to get ugly.
I'll tell you what would feel good. Stamps.com, baby. That always makes me feel good. Pop quiz. Best time to go to the post office? Before work? After work? During lunch? Brian, what do you think? If I had to choose? C? Wrong!
Never! Goddammit!
Never! That's right. There's no convenient time to go to the post office. You go to stamps.com. That's what you need. You can buy and print official U.S. postage, and you do it right from your own computer. They've got a special offer. Enter the promo code ADAM for a no-risk trial, $110 bonus offer, includes digital scale, $55, free postage. Go to stamps.com.
Before you do anything else, click on the microphone, top of the home page, type in ADAM. That is stamps.com, promo code ADAM, and we'll take a quick break. Fitz Dogg. Rick Fitzsimmons is out there. We'll bring him in next. FitzDawg, Greg Fitzsimmons with us. He's going to be playing at the Fort Lauderdale Improv and Morty's Comedy Joint, Indianapolis. Also, that is May 24th.
Sorry, April 24th through the 26th. May 8th through the 10th. Now, FitzDawg. Feels good to be home, Adam. Always glad to have you back. I'm just getting started doing the pre-production on this Road Hard movie, and I wonder if you can walk me through what would be a tough weekend for you doing comedy and the general schedule.
I mean, to me, as bad as it gets is flying in a day early to do morning radio. Right. What is it tough? Like for you, and you like doing stand-up, but still, when you see some of these dates on your calendar, you see some of those coming up like a hemorrhoid, right? Like, oh, that's going to be a rough patch.
Yeah, well, Dom Irere always says, I do comedy for free. They pay me to travel. Right. And it is. It's coming in a day early. They say, you know, the gig is Friday, Saturday. And you're like, great. It's just the weekend. And they're like, yeah, they actually want you to come in on Thursday night to do Friday radio. And so then you come in and you get in at midnight.
No, Thursday night to do Friday morning radio for shows Friday, Saturday night. Right.
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