Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?
Welcome to Corolla Classics. I'm your host, Superfan Giovanni. This is the podcast where we play the best moments, highlights, and fan-selected clips from all 16 years of The Adam Corolla Show. We have a companion podcast titled Corolla Classics, available through PodcastOne.plus, where you can find the ad-free archives.
And if you'd like the ad-free archives for The Adam Corolla Show, The Adam and Dr. Drew Show, or exclusive access to the brand-new podcast Beat It Out, make sure to check out Adam Corolla's Substack at adamcorolla.substack.com. And if you'd like to request a clip, please email us, classics, at adamcorolla.com. Let's get to the clips.
Coming up first, we have Adam Krulishow, 1273, featuring Monica Mehta, Jesse Ventura, Alison Rosen, and Brian Bishop from 2014.
Good day, Allison Rosen.
Hello, Adam Carolla. You look very snazzy on a day when we have no air conditioning.
Thank you. And Bald Brian. That part is not funny.
The guy who was the caller in that call, at Bent Neck, requested that on Twitter, hashtag top drop. He requested a selfie.
Wow, I like that. Yeah, we had a little electrical issue here at the shop, and believe it or not, it gets warm in the studio with the lack of circulation and the lights and all. I was doing a little ESPN work today, so I had to get dressed up to do the TV to go out and do a little promotion for the Catch a Contractor thing. Although I now realize everyone's calling it To Catch a Contractor.
Trained by the NBC show. Yeah, I think it's called Catch a Contractor, but we'll work it out. I also did Stern this morning. I wish I wasn't such a puss, like sleep puss. I'm a fucking Viking in all other areas, but a sleep puss.
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Chapter 2: How does Adam Carolla prepare for his early morning shows?
I got to do Stern. And the Stern time was... 3.55 a.m. our time. And then I had a full day after that But it was going to be one of these things where, well, you get up, you do your thing and then, you know, you can go back to bed. But a couple of things. Your thing is being lucid and funny is not the same as you getting up, picking up a friend from an airport and coming back like that.
I'll stay in my bathrobe. And by the time I get back to my house, I'll probably when I fall asleep, wake up the next morning, I probably forgot I did it. This is a wake up, you know, be entertaining.
There's no sweatpants and slippers in comedy.
I literally was in my sweatpants and slippers. But there's this part of you.
Your brain was well dressed.
Well, it's like Lynette was setting the coffee pot for three thirty a.m. instead of the six thirty seven in the morning. And I said. There's that weird choice. Like, I want to get a cup of coffee and wake up and be funny in front of millions of people. On the other hand, I'd like to go back to bed when I hang up at half an hour instead of drink half a pot of coffee at four in the morning.
And then what? So I did this move. I always screw myself up with this, but I had my timer, and I was going to call in at 3.55 a.m., and we would just chat. The thing with Stern is you could go 14, 16 minutes. You could go an hour. You don't really know. And I did the move where I went to bed at about two minutes to midnight, but I wanted to set my little kitchen timer for four hours.
I wanted the psychological advantage of doing four hours versus three hours and 52 minutes, which I should have done either way. Got up two minutes to 4 a.m. Confuses the shit out of the dog, by the way. Like there's two thoughts I had. One is I woke up and when I got up, Molly was like, huh? Where are we going, boss? Because when I get up, it's time for Molly to get up.
So Molly did the move where she was up, but she didn't know why she was up. And she was kind of trotting around the living room. And she was like, eh. I don't have to take a piss because I don't normally take a piss at four in the morning. But now that I'm up, maybe I'll take a piss. But I'm not sure exactly what this new arrangement is.
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Chapter 3: What insights does Jesse Ventura share about his views on air travel?
That's Monica Mehta. I'm not a fan of the news. The entrepreneurial instinct. We'll talk about that next with Monica. Well, back with Monica Mehta. She's been on the show before, The Entrepreneurial Instinct. Allison, you're going to step up that news game now.
It's the dud of a story.
Monica does judge over there.
It's the dud of a story.
She's bringing her A game, and so am I. I brought my olive branch as well.
Allison, hopefully you'll forgive me.
Oh, I will. I mean, I'll defend that story to the death. It was the 50th anniversary of the cassette tape, for God's sake. So are you defending mediocrity? Oh, thank you for extending this branch. Accepted. It's broken.
Next time, lube it before you shove it up her ass. All right. Yeah, I mean, look, the 50th anniversary of the cassette only comes around once in a lifetime. Our kids will want to know where we were.
It's just a waste of my time.
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Chapter 4: What are the implications of using guns for self-defense?
Yeah, his feet just moving. Just kicking? Probably not his feet. Yeah, so it is a weird... And there's always that thing where it's like, all right, well, the one shot, but then all the shots after that... I mean, I guess you could... Here's the point. I don't think... I think he's going to walk.
I don't think he's getting locked up and people are going to be upset about this, but there's enough. There's enough. There'll be enough questions. All you need is just that element of, and he just does the, I feared for my life and this neighborhood, there's been break-ins and I don't have legs and I was using this to protect myself and I didn't know it was on the other side of the door.
He mixed all that in with panic and then a lot of, well, you don't know how you would react either if you had no legs and we're in South Africa and someone gave you a 44 and locked you in a bathroom.
If all of if if that is what happened and I don't think it is, but if he was just in a state and he was panicked and, you know, fight or flight kicked in and that's why he shot her four times because he thought she was an intruder. Isn't that an argument against guns?
Yeah.
For this guy, at least.
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Chapter 5: How do personal safety measures influence family security?
Oh, well, well, he's got fight or roll. He doesn't have fight or flight. That's his problem. And the argument to me, the argument for. got guys like that or guys in that position having guns you're going to shoot the wrong person a lot of the time and don't get me wrong i mean the thing about the gun thing is this if he's in a position where it's like he can't i'll put it to you this way um
If there's a ā if I was in a neighborhood that had a fair bit of crime, I knew I was going to be out of town and I knew my wife and kids were going to be home. I would like my wife to have access to a gun. I would like her to be trained with that gun, but I would like her to have access to it. But I'm ā
On the other hand, there's simple things to me that I never understood why most people don't implement. Like my bedroom doors always had a deadbolt on it. I just locked the deadbolt. And I always tell my wife, look, if I'm out of town, lock that deadbolt. And then she'd always go, what about the kids? And I'd be like, you're not going to do them any good if said intruder's in your room.
Chapter 6: What are the risks associated with everyday conveniences?
Unfortunately, that's going to give you time to call 911 and go get the pistol out or whatever it is. Hopefully the kids will make it during that time and then mama is situated. But what mama doesn't want to do is wake up and have a dude standing at the foot of the bed. That's not going to help anybody.
So there's little things that I don't understand why more people like I don't know what percentage of Americans. have walked in on their parents having sex and or, I mean, you don't want to see the back of dad's sack when you're nine years of age. It's that well, a bedroom that's in bathroom. It's imprinted. Yeah. Saying is like, literally just a barrel bolt on the door.
How many times have people done that thing where they're like, I woke up and the guy was standing over my bed? Well, if you just had literally a $3 barrel bolt, the kind that just takes a wood screw and goes into the casing of the door and the other female sides on the door and you just do that, you can't sneak up
And if you're getting frisky with the old lady, it keeps the kids from seeing Papa's back sack. Why not? Why? You know, the average bathroom in America has a privacy lock on it. Why not the average master bedroom for that matter? But yet most don't. I don't I think there's and this wasn't this wasn't the case in this situation.
But I think there's common sense things that most people can do differently. To prevent a lot of this, I woke up and the person was. I mean, some of it is keep your porch light on. Some of it is just like basic shit.
Okay, question. Because this sort of dovetails with the stuff we were talking about, risk and all of that that Monica was talking about. Do you think that people who have the entrepreneurial spirit are also safe at home? Can you have a healthy combination of both, of wanting to take risks but also thinking of everything that could go wrong at home and ā you know, making it safe there?
That's a really interesting question. So I've seen studies that show that people who are wired to take risks that have that instinct have maintained that risk-taking appetite throughout their life. So while for the average person, your appetite to take risks is highest in your teens, for that entrepreneur, you're maintaining the same appetite in your 60s and your 70s. And so what happens is
again, if you take risk-taking and take a step back, it's a combination of being impulsive and being adaptable. People who are just impulsive and just kind of like, you know, go and try different things all the time, sometimes we perceive those as the risky ones.
And it's the people who actually have the adaptability that can work that, you know, bias to action or just jumping into new things without thinking through it to a positive place. So, you know, Any entrepreneur who really is able to be successful has found a way to really mitigate the downside.
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Chapter 7: What controversial advice is given about personal safety?
You should break a broomstick off in your asshole so you're not violently raped out on the street. It's your fault before you leave the house. You should have known better. Yeah, that shit always fucking drives me nuts. And then the part also, now, at least in L.A., the cops don't even pretend. Like, they just go, you know, somebody goes, somebody stole my laptop.
And they're like, well, good luck. That's never going to happen. You're never going to get that back. Yeah.
Chapter 8: How do police responses to theft differ in Los Angeles?
They just now it's a whole lower your expectation. Somebody ran into my house while I was out of town.
The new house?
No, the old house. And Lynette called the cops and they're like, well, did he did he hit them? house or just kind of clip it physically ran inside the structure drunk driver just drunk he just makes like slumped over the wheel like the airbag went off he was throwing his booze bottles like out down it down the hill you know into the scrub and everything and they're like yeah
We don't have anyone in the neighborhood. Like, well, we're in the middle of Hollywood. Just go ahead and sit. Here's what. Pretend somebody parked their fucking car and didn't turn the wheels in. Now, would you have somebody in the fucking neighborhood? We'll be right there, sir.
That's your mistake. You should have said, there's someone littering. Come right now and write him a ticket. They would have been on top.
Yeah. Right. I saw someone throw a cigarette butt on the ground.
Money-making opportunities. Throwing bottles out the window. Come get them.
I'm utterly convinced that a guy got killed about two years ago in Pasadena because a guy got his laptop snatched, stolen, whatever. They pulled out of his hands and they ran. He called the police department and he said, they stole my laptop. And they're like, well, what are you going to do? And he said they had a gun. And then the cops went, oh, they had a gun. And then they rolled on it.
And then they rolled up on the guy who didn't have a gun. And then they shot the guy dead. The guy got his laptop stolen, said they had a gun because he wanted the cops. You know, you have to cook the story. Yeah. Meaning if you just say, oh, somebody just stole some of my shit or somebody just ran into my wall of my house, that's not enough.
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