Parenting and caring for special needs

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Alive and Kicking with Clare McKenna 21 min 4 speakers 6 chapters transcribed 1 month ago

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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

Shannon Maldonado 0:00

I founded Ornot in 2013. I think the best thing about Shopify is that we can practice business without technical skills. We can manage the company's background and front-end systems and sell online. If Shopify was a bicycle equipment, it would be a bicycle itself. That way things are handled and our business is handled in Shopify. Start your free trial at shopify.com.

Claire McKenna 0:31

Alive and kicking with Claire McKenna on Newstalk.

Clare McKenna 0:39

Now, Marina Giblin is a senior portfolio manager at a financial firm and mother to her much-loved daughter, Elsie, who was born with additional needs. We often hear of the struggles for support and long waiting lists, inadequacies in our education system, societal and policy support. So what is the reality in the home when you're parenting and caring in the midst of all of this? Well, I'm delighted to say that Marina joins me in studio now. Marina, you're very welcome.

Marina Giblin 1:05

Thank you very much, Clare. Nice to be here.

Clare McKenna 1:07

We met at an event and we were on a panel together and we started chatting. And when you told me about Elsie and your life, I really thought this was something I wanted to cover on the show. Because as I say, it's something we don't hear enough about. The carers, who are these people and what kind of impact is it having on your life? So I'm so grateful for you to come and share something that I know is very personal to you. I find it difficult to talk about my own kids as they get older. So I really appreciate you coming in.

Marina Giblin 1:34

No, thank you. Thank you. And it's a pleasure to be able to talk about it, to be fair. But I suppose I'd correct you on one thing. Go on. I don't see myself as Elsie's carer. I'm her mother. And most people in my position are mothers. And so you have a baby and you expect everything may be going all right. And then next thing you know, you have this baby that's special in different ways and you don't plan for that at all. But as a mother, you know, you do what every other mother does. And so you try to navigate the world for your daughter or your son in the best way you can. But when you have a child like Elsie, and I like to call her exceptional because she's exceptional, she's different in some ways, you shouldn't have to take on the world to find her place in the world.

Marina Giblin 2:23

And that to me has been... Eye-opening. I might have been naive because Elsie's condition has no name. So I thought, oh, this is great. Nobody can put a label on her.

Who is Marina Giblin and what is her connection to special‑needs parenting?

Marina Giblin 2:34

But then the world we live in, everyone wants a label. So you fight that first and then you take it from there.

Clare McKenna 2:43

And I really appreciate the correction. I'm always on for correction and learning. And it is an important distinction. And I want to ask you about terminology, because even when I was writing that introduction, I wondered how best to describe Elsie. And I said additional needs. We hear special needs. How do you feel about the term terminology? disability because we talk a lot about disability rights and I have an issue now with disability. I think it's already starting on a negative about that person.

Marina Giblin 3:14

Well, I suppose if you take a right back to Ireland's historical past and the treatment of people that were vulnerable, we have a very sordid past. Like basically people were institutionalized. They were segregated. Most of the help or support that was given was charity based. They were viewed as people to be pitied. They were viewed, you know, that they were separate from society.

What is the day‑to‑day reality of parenting a child with additional needs?

Marina Giblin 3:41

And a lot of that legacy is still there. So that's where the terminology comes. Like Elsie's my daughter. That's it. Simple. And she sees that as herself. She's Elsie and she doesn't see herself as any different than any other daughter. And she navigates life as best she can. She has a huge acceptance of her abilities that she needs help with and support with. And she knows she needs help and support. And that's not a surprise. But then she looks at me and she'll say, oh, well, you have this. And she looks at somebody else and she'll say, you have this. And if you look around you, everybody has something that differentiates them and they're different.