And That's Why We Drink

E160 Parry Hotter and a Choose Your Own Sad-venture

23 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

It's not you, it's not me, this week it's not even Houdini... it's the Minnesota Iceman! Em brings us the storied past of a cryptid who's rumored to h...

E159 A Sinister Vibe Check and the Governor of Noodletown

16 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Please don't burn our chairs! This week we accidentally coordinated Ohio stories for you. Em takes us to the Ohio State Reformatory for some hauntings...

E158 A Vodka Blanket and Radioactive Snow Angels

09 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Alert! Alert! We're implementing the vodka emergency buddy system this week, people! Em's holding Christine and Christine's holding the vodka because ...

E157 A Hollywood Alien Correspondent and an Outer Space Lemon

02 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

So what time does your family perform their seance? Today Em dives into the wild paranormal history of the Aykroyd family... and the origins of the mo...

Listener Stories: Vol. 37

01 Feb 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Happy love month, everyone! Per Christine's request we have soul mate, romance and other-worldly connection related stories for ya! Whether it's a par...

E156 The Chairman of the Haunted House Committee and Too Many Walters

26 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Don't worry, we have that DIY "How to Be a Medium" guide you've been waiting for. Well, Houdini does! Em is on to the second part in their series on H...

E155 A Teatime Seance and Lin-Manuel Miranda’s Next Big Hit

19 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Don't worry, it's not me, it's not you, it's Houdini... This week Em is bringing us the first in their two part series on Houdini and his badass invol...

E154 An Opera About Bread and A Fake Monogrammed Private Jet for Dogs

12 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Did you know that Charles Dickens is the new Bloody Mary? We're bringing you all kinds of fun facts from our 2019 live show at the Wilbur in Boston! W...

E153 An Ego Snack and a Lemon-napping

05 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Happy New Year, boozers and shakers! We're headed to Houston with our stories this week with Em covering the spooky Hotel Galvez and Christine recoun...

Listener Stories: Vol. 36

01 Jan 2020

Contributed by Lukas

Happy New Year! We're flappin' into 2020 (because we're flappers now) by reading your story submissions and we've got some great ones for you this mon...

E152 A Cute Bread and Breakfast and Emotional Grilled Cheese Sandwiches

29 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Dear future children, please bring us grilled cheese sandwiches... we'll need them for the stories we're telling today! Em takes us back to Kansas Cit...

E151 The Penultimate Sisyphean Nightmare and Cursed Raisins

22 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Christmas time is here! Have you scattered pancakes on your roof yet? We've got some notorious, holiday-themed stories for you today! Em takes us on a...

E150 Soul Stealing Otters and a Detector Inspector

15 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Hellidays, everyone (don't worry, we're workshopping it)! We're coming in cold this pre-holidays week as Em takes us to Alaska in search of the ...

E149 An Unidentified Naked Object and the Girl Who Cried Jude Law

08 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We've got an inadvertent ocean theme going this week and, don't worry, we're not out of our DEPTH when it comes to sea puns... Em brings us the story ...

Listener Stories: Vol. 35

01 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's twin time!! Last month Christine requested "creepy twin tales," and listeners, you did not disappoint... For a FREE 11x14" photo canvas from Can...

E148 Fro-Yo Fridays and 15,000 Slices of Dirty Meatloaf

01 Dec 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Merry Christmas Tanner! Let's all go tap-dance on Em's coattails. This week we both accidentally end up in Salt Lake City, which seems to be a pretty ...

E147 Catsgiving and a Sleeping Tuxedo

24 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pass the cranberry sauce, it's turkey time!! Or pre-that time anyway and we're sending you all the best whatever your plans may be! We've got some doo...

E146 Iceberg Feet and Valuable Skittles

17 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Surprise! We're going back on tour in 2020! Be sure to stay tuned because we'll be releasing cities and dates shortly but in the meantime Patreon dono...

E145 Octo-Puns and the Goose CamTM

10 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Get ready because Em Mustard and Christine Horseradish, Private Investigators, are on the case! Our first big adventure involves helping the CIA unwir...

E144 A Baby with Teeth and Another Pillar of the Community

03 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to the world, Baby Chremit! (Don’t be alarmed by his teeth.) In episode 144, after introducing you to their offspring, Em covers Portland’...

Listener Stories: Vol. 34

01 Nov 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Turkey Month! We hope you all had the spookiest of Halloweens and are all settled in in your Fall finest to hear some creepy doppelgänger stori...

E143 Portal Ripping Muscles and Vampire Rumors

27 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Ashes to ashes and bone dust to bone dust... Welcome to our spooky ooky Halloween special! We're kicking things off with a three-person costume contes...

E142 The Buffalo Plaid Anniversary and a Sweaty, Sweaty Witch

20 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Funcle Em strikes back! We're drenched in buffalo plaid and Canadian cheer this week - Christine is back from Halifax and has brought Em an entire sou...

E141 Alligator Neck Looping and A Casual Last Minute Seance

13 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Remember to wear your motion sickness bracelets this week because our stories are full of twists and turns! Christine is currently buying souvenirs fo...

E140 Psychedelic Conversations and the Frogman's Lazy River

06 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're officially into Spook-tober! And we're advocating for fingerprinting every "pillar of the community" just in case! We're also bringing the creep...

Listener Stories: Vol. 33

01 Oct 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy spooky season, creeps and peeps! We're bringing you some wild stories today from a request Christine doesn't necessarily remember making: the sc...

E139 Lemon's Cousin and the Alien Frog Vendetta

29 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Please don't attack us, you hideous beasts! Do you think insulting aliens will make them less likely to abduct us? Hang on for a wild ride into the mo...

E138 Five-Dollar Geodes and Our Never Ending Awkward Phase

22 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

That's certainly not just a rock. if you look really carefully you'll find that it's a geode and Christine will sell it to you for $5. What a steal! T...

E137 Satan's Little Helper and the Year of the Microwave

15 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're asking the hard hitting questions this week: which came first the Pukwudgie or the hauntings? Em follows up on their Bridgewater Triangle story ...

E136 A French Toast Ghost and the Pepper Spray Squad

08 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're back on tour this week! And guess what... we got haunted in New Orleans! Check out our intro to hear the full story of our new teen ghost friend...

Listener Stories: Vol. 32

01 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy September, Boozers and Shakers! We might have gotten distracted by pizza and some old school nonsense videos online but we're here and we're sla...

E135 The Ghost of Lamps Past and A Pumpkin Stealing Cryptid

01 Sep 2019

Contributed by Lukas

You say "buffet" and we say "where"! Today we're privy to a "buffet of the unexplained" and we're feeling extra spooky with our stories: Em tackles th...

E134 A "Quicker Than You Look" Trophy and a Threddit Rabbit Hole

25 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Enter the Play-Doh aisle at your own risk this week, folks. Em's taking us on a wild ride through the stories of the unrequited ghosts who lived in a ...

E133 A Dumpy Tunnel and Dungeon Lite TM

18 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Pardon us, we need a quick turkey intermission... Juniper will fill in for us while we're gone. This week we're leaving the U.S. to cover the haunting...

E132 A Lost Bitch and the Weirdest Thing Said in an Interview

11 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hold on to your Bermuda shorts and khaki hot pants because we've got some doozies for you this week. Em shakes the dust off their Detroit notes and co...

E131 A Pretzel Worm and the 'That Was Easy' Button

04 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Don't mind us, we're just shaving Juniper and putting him on a dragon... Join us on an epic journey to learn all about the Austrian cryptid, the Tatze...

Listener Stories: Vol. 31

01 Aug 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Speaking of fractions and astrology... happy August! We've got some wild, wild listener stories this month with a theme straight from Christine's wild...

E130 A Creature's Femur and Giovani 3:16

28 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy National Ravioli Day! We're talking Brazilian aliens and murderous mommy blogs today. Come take a deep dive with Em into the intricate and, quit...

E129 A Tipsy Alien and Your Least Favorite Word

21 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's flap o' clock somewhere in the universe! Join us for Flappy Hour this week as Em and Christine chat Braxy the Flatwoods Monster of West Virginia ...

E128 A Lasagna House and Scrapbooks of Destruction

14 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Listen, we know a thing or two about chalk, salt and the date of the Civil War. This week Em's hitting us with knowledge on the most haunted house in ...

E127 Human Wine and the Postal Service Bark

07 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy July! We're celebrating Em and Allison's love... and Alexander's third wheel status throughout the beginnings of their relationship. This week E...

Listener Stories: Vol. 30

01 Jul 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy July! We can't believe birthday month is over but the show must go on... This month we've got some wild true crime listener stories that might b...

E126 Summer Camp at the Occult Vault and A Flintstone Motorcade

30 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to Dr. Junie's Colonoscopy Clinic! Where you're guaranteed to have a qualified feline professional perform your procedure... Strap in because ...

E125 A Neighborhood of Haunted Houses and Codename Vanilla Lunch

23 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're down to clown aka down to sassy today! Even though we're sadly nearing the end of birthday month. Em's bringing us back to the paranormal world ...

E124 A Birdless Penguin and The Wink Face Emoji

16 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Is it still our birthdays? Because we ate an entire ice cream cake in between our stories today! We've got some whoppers for you today - Em closes out...

E123 The Ignoramus of Nevada and a Poisoned Prune Cake

09 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

It's birthday week recap time! And don't worry, we baked, smashed, and slumber partied our way into our own personal new years! This week we're bringi...

E122 Alien Bumper Cars and MTV Crypts

02 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome to the birthday crypt! We're feeling old but birthday ready this week so it's no wonder MTV Crypts wants to showcase us! This week Em treats u...

Listener Stories: Vol. 29

01 Jun 2019

Contributed by Lukas

IT’S BIRTHDAY MONTH! And we’re celebrating with haunted twins, handsy ghosts, and black-eyed strangers. Is this week’s theme cheese? Sweden? Dem...

E121 The Plumbing Dutchman and a Murderous Glow Down

26 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hold onto your bellybuttons, because it’s finally here! This week we had the pleasure of sitting down with the lovely gals of Wine & Crime to discus...

E120 Burial Physics and the Troll of Jackass Hill

19 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Please pardon our fuzzy audio as we come to you “long-distance” from our neighboring hotel rooms! This week Em tells the story of Ohio’s Gore Or...

E119 A Shadow Figure Selfie and Inappropriate Dream Journaling

12 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hey who hasn't conjured black pigs and flying monkeys to torment their neighbors? Join us for one of our favorite live shows from our friendship's hom...

E118 A Demon in the Drain and Pentagrams on the Golf Course

05 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Shalom in the home! Christine's childhood home to be exact! We're recording in the wild this week which is a treat and a curse (sorry in advance for t...

Listener Stories: Vol. 28

01 May 2019

Contributed by Lukas

May we just say, "happy May"?! This month we're reading your stories that include a beach cult, a haunted library, and a pelvis found on a hiking trai...

E117 The Buddy System Til Death and Sprinkles of Light in the Chicago Suburbs

28 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

What are you doin' tonight, cowboy? Lasso us up! And join us for our Chicago live show! Em brings us a trifecta of food themed spooky stories includin...

E116 The Pancake Witching Hour and the Ghost of Burritos Past

21 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Is the bird the word or the word the bird? Well, either way the word of the day is bird but maybe you just had to be there. Welcome to episode 116, cr...

E115 A Digital Butler and Walls Full of Secrets

14 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We've got a surprise for you this week, creeps and peeps! We're bringing you our Milwaukee and Asbury Park, New Jersey stories retold from the studio!...

E114 A Gnarly Rumor and Hysterical Historians

07 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Sit back, relax and let us tell you where the idea of probing took off! Don't worry, you PROBABLY won't be abducted after listening to this episode. T...

Listener Stories: Vol. 27

01 Apr 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy April, ya fools! We may have forgotten to play any pranks but we do have some 90's themed spooky stories for you! This month we hear from listen...

E113 Millennial Pink and Spanish Moss Red Bug Crayons

31 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Cover those ankles, ladies! Because you just might end up in St. Augustine's Old Jail! This week we're bringing you the haunted happenings of the old ...

E112 The Age of Flurida and a Florida Man Floriscope

24 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We're back from Florida and it might have all been a flu hallucination but we had a blast! We've also got some new spooky jams for you today: Em bring...

E111 A Ghost Tour by Em and a Mother of Pearl Pie Tin

17 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

We’re currently sweating and hiding from gators in Florida, so this week we’re coming to you LIVE in our beanies from Portland, Oregon, home of ou...

E110 A Pretty Little Monster and a Planetary Enzyme

10 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Calling all cool teens! Stop snagging and necking and tune into our horniest episode ever! In episode 110 Em covers the Goatman(person?) of Maryland. ...

E109 A Tornado of Cuddles and an Extra Ab

03 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Hey there, drunks and punks (go with us, we’re trying to make it happen)! Welcome to our smooth and goosebumpy sounds! We’re back in a re-styled s...

Listener Stories: Vol. 26

01 Mar 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy March, everyone! Did you know that knowledge is power and just because you're dead doesn’t mean your education has to stop? Today we learn tha...

E108 The Kings of Banter and a Mummified Lemon

24 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

If this plane goes down, don’t tell our mothers we were in group 8! We were home from tour long enough to record this week and are already back on t...

E107 Ghostly Cat Toes and a Box-in-a-Box-in-a-Box

17 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Odds are we’re currently in an airport, on an airplane, or in an airport again. That’s why we’re coming at you live from Phoenix, AZ, this week!...

E106 The Worst Toy Story and an Empty Wine Stockpile

10 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Do you see shadow people? Is there a ghost texting you? Does a witch crawl up your face and grab your teeth while you're in bed? Then you just might h...

E105 The Great Non-Binary Owl and Kronk’s Evil Twin

03 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

So guess what? This week is a hoot and a half so strap in for a wild ride! Em delves into the Kelly-Hopkinsville alien encounter and Christine takes u...

Listener Stories: Vol. 25

01 Feb 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy February, creeps and peeps (thank you, Margaret)! We’re in the month of love and we’ve got some spooky, glitchy, and mothman related stories...

E104 The Golden Girls Horror Crossover and a Cousin Cat

27 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

White knuckle and buckle, everyone. We’re going beyond vision boarding this week because emergency preparedness is so in right now. Join us as Em sh...

E103 Martian Beer Pong and Sweat Glands of the Hand

20 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Guys. Our heads hurt. We’re time traveling again this week for Em’s second part in their series on Project Pegasus and our minds are sufficiently ...

E102 Quantum Madness and an Abundance of Icicles

13 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Helicopters are swarming the studio for this one, folks, because we're on a huge conspiracy theory kick this week! Em brings us the first in their two...

E101 A Ghost in the Nude and a Pasta Peddler

06 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Christine’s immune system rebelled against her this week, so we’re coming at you with our first Philly live show! Em covers the General Wayne Inn,...

Listener Stories: Vol. 24

01 Jan 2019

Contributed by Lukas

Happy 2019, everyone! Or as Christine is singing, "2019... is here". We've got a fresh batch of spooky listener stories for your new year's listening ...

E100 Cryptids for 400 and a Best-Friend-Elope

30 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Something is very wonky in the state of Brussels, but don't worry because THIS IS OUR 100TH EPISODE!! Hold on to your buckets because we've got presen...

E99 Paranormal Swirl and Aura Imprinting

23 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Spirit of Christine, are you there? Scratch us with three claw marks if you want us to leave this kiddie pool of wine by your grave! In the last episo...

E98 Exorcism Colonics and a Hot Sauce Love Potion

16 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

So sorry, everyone, we have to reschedule. We have a demonic assault penciled in for 3pm today. But in the meantime, Em brings us a movie report of th...

E97 A Rogue Cork and the Millennium Special

09 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Alright, call the priest, Em's future child is causing poltergeist activity again with their baking soda volcano. This week Em brings us the rollickin...

E96 A Garden in the Rear and a Rejection from ISIS

02 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

This week, #ChristineGetsBelized so we've decided to release a live episode. In our first stop on our East Coast tour, Em covers DC's Octagon House a...

Listener Stories: Vol. 23

01 Dec 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Christmastime is here and Christine finally gets to sing about it. This month we've got festive listener stories that include secrets revealed at a my...

E95 A Wendigo Named Megan and a Winnebago in the Woods

25 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Happy Thanksgiving weekend, everyone! Let's all pray to Gio's butt curtain that Christine doesn't get eaten by a flesh-eating monster on her honeymoon...

E94 Cocoa Pebbles County and the Cannibal Cafe

18 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Buckle up, everyone! We've got an extra dark episode for you this week. Em covers the horrific events that happened during the operation of the Byberr...

E93 The Broad of Broadcast and a Love Rhombus

11 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Welcome back to the ghost story and murder situation show! It's Friendiversary time, folks! And this year Em got Christine a new fly fishing rod from ...

E92 Twin Theybies and a Phone Call to the Mayor

04 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Merry Christmas and a Happy Halloween! Spooky season continues with Halloween 2.0 featuring Em as Marty McFly and Christine as... still in her cat one...

Listener Stories: Vol. 22

01 Nov 2018

Contributed by Lukas

It may be the day after Halloween but we're spooky year round! Today we read your listener stories featuring the Brazilian version of Bloody Mary, a v...

E91 Mad Lib Disease and an Everlasting Faint

28 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We're back in real time! Christine has redirected her wedding planning energy into Halloween surprises! And don't worry, it's only part one of our Hal...

E90 High Quality Demonic Excitement and a Serial Killer Crossover

21 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Shout out to all our suspiciously beautiful listeners out there because you just might be a witch! This pre-Halloween spooky season Em brings us the h...

E89 Violent Tickling and a Hollywood Bonfire

14 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Christine gets married this weekend (in other words, #christinegetsblaised) so we decided to release our most recent live episode from the Hollywood I...

E88 A Low Key Brothel and a Japanese Skater Boy

07 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Ok, stop pinching people's butts and do something good. This week Em dives into the haunts of the Cary Hotel in Placerville, California and one ghost,...

Listener Stories: Vol. 21

01 Oct 2018

Contributed by Lukas

OK, we're seeing a trend here. We're definitely on a friendly ghost kick after a certain doll who shan't be named. This month we read listeners' stori...

E87 Paranormal Fun Facts and Your Sister's Pony

30 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Are you sitting down? It's about time we had the talk. When a mommy ghost and a daddy ghost love each other very much that's how a baby ghost is born!...

E86 The Haunted Doll Market and 420 Zodiac

23 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

You might need your EMF readers for this one because we've got two intense stories today. Em brings us the incredibly well-documented and terrifying (...

E85 Transgender Lemonade and Old Ass Bowling Balls

16 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Episode 85 is upon us! Get your holy water ready because Em takes us back to the Zak Bagan's Haunted Museum to cover Ed Gein's cauldron and Bela Lugos...

E84 A Powerful Chicken and a Techno Haunting

09 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Come closer…. we have a secret to tell you… we're certainly not going to vomit a chicken into your mouth. This week Em takes us step-by-step throu...

E83 Ghost Goats and Horror-scopes

02 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Listen, we'll set a hell portal on fire, if that's what you need. This week, Em brings us face-to-face with the square-shaped goat pupils of the haunt...

Listener Stories: Vol. 20

01 Sep 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We've been reading your spooky stories for 20 weeks! Today we've got a stalker in a hurricane, a huge WTF story and a random (or was it?) black eyed k...

E82 Everyone's Ghostly Step Dad and a Tattoo of Frosted Tips

26 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

You've CAT to be KITTEN me. It's our 101st episode (including listener eps) and we celebrated with Moon Pie, cream soda and holy water-themed gifts! T...

E81 Little Pilgrims and Astrological Issues

19 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Love your hair, hate your guts! It's just funny that Em brings back the drunk sorority girl voice but it's fine, we'll talk about it later... This wee...

E80 Paranormal Justice and a Depressing High School Reunion

12 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

We’ve been traveling for weeks, so this episode comes to you live from Nashville! Grab your drink and play along with the ATWWD drinking game as Em ...

E79 A Demonic Cold Sore and the World's Smallest Violin

05 Aug 2018

Contributed by Lukas

Spoiler alert: We survived Christine's Vegas Bachelorette (despite the waiver we signed at Zak Bagan's Haunted Museum)! Today Christine covers the bru...