Show notes
But I Can't Afford A Therapist 💥 "I can't afford therapy…" Sound familiar? You're not alone. And you're not stuck. In this longer unplugged episode, we tackle one of the most common barriers to better mental health: not being able to access or afford professional support. 🎙️ But what if that didn't have to stop you? This is not about ignoring the problem or playing it down. It's about taking back control—step by step—and discovering powerful, proven ways to feel better, move forward, and heal… without spending a penny. You'll learn: Why feeling stuck is natural—but change is possible The real damage of waiting, blaming, and self-berating (and how to stop) A DIY approach to emotional healing that's empowering, practical and free How to journal your way from confusion to clarity The one question you must stop asking—and the one that will change everything Why walking and breathing (yes, really!) can shift your whole internal world How to create your own step-by-step roadmap from where you are to where you want to be And access to my free hypnosis tracks to support your journey 💬 Plus: Why giving up is not an option, and how to feel safe, steady and hopeful—even when life feels heavy. This isn't fluff. It's action. It's simple because it works. And it's here for you right now. 🎧 Listen, share, and let's start a movement of healing—together. https://personaldevelopmentunplugged.com/457-but-i-cant-afford-a-therapist/ Shine Brightly 🌟 Paul Hey there! I'd love to hear from you—questions, feedback, requests—all welcome. Drop me a line or leave a comment. If you've enjoyed this episode or any other, please share and subscribe! You can reach me at [email protected]. Subscribe to the Podcast Ready to subscribe? Click here to explore your options. Or, if you're on Apple Music or iTunes, you can go straight to subscribe or leave a review here. Special Programs for You For tools on developing Supreme Inner Confidence, finding Freedom from Anxiety, or specialized Hypnosis Tracks, visit PaulCloughOnline.com. Free Hypnosis Tracks Want access to my FREE hypnosis tracks? Head over to paulcloughonline.com/podcast. Connect with Me Follow me on Twitter: @pcloughie Remember: I'm a therapist, but I'm not your therapist. This podcast and any of my online resources are for educational purposes only. Never use the hypnosis tracks or exercises if you're operating machinery, driving, or if you have epilepsy or psychiatric conditions. Always consult a healthcare provider if you're unsure. Find Us on Other Platforms Catch the podcast on Spotify, Castbox, iHeart Radio, YouTube, or on our Libsyn page. Stay tuned, and keep shining brightly. ✨ Music Credits Music by Wataboi, DreamHeaven, ccjmusic, and others from Pixabay. And the transcript WARNING if you're a lover of the written word this may make you frustrated, or angry - you have been warned - is it an 'ism  #457 But I Can't Afford A Therapist   Hey, back to the longer podcast with me Paul. Personal development unplugged. And I've been hearing quite a few things about people getting anxious because they can't get access to professional support for their mental health.  You know, they're not feeling in a good state and not being able to get access to someone who can help them actually is creating more anxiety, more stress. And therefore obviously that state gets worse, health gets worse and everything just goes tits up basically. So what do you do? What do you do when you can't get any access to that professional support? What do you do? What do you do where you could blame everything else? Everyone else? Because the world is unfair.  Because it is unfair, it's totally unfair. You know, it's not, well, it's just unfair. Or you could have a pity party, which is a bit like blaming the world, isn't it? And just have a pity party by yourself.  You could do. Or you could just hide away. Hide away, not let anybody see that you're down and hide away.  You can hide away in plain sight, by the way, because you can put your defences up. Or you could show everybody, you know, and look for pity, maybe. You can also talk down to yourself, because talking down to yourself and berating yourself, well, that's what we do, isn't it? Or you ask yourself some really stupid questions.  Things like, why is this happening to me? Why is this happening to me? Who the fuck cares why? You don't need to know why. If you knew why, would it change the situation? Not one bit. What's another stupid question? Well, how bad can this get? Or could this get any worse? Really stupid fucking questions.  Why are they stupid? I'm sorry about swearing, but I just wanted to rock your boat a little bit, because those questions, you're asking your unconscious mind, because it's listening to what you say, whether it's outside or generally we do it on that with our internal voice, it's constantly listening to what you say. And we'll try to answer the questions. So if you ask, how bad can this get? Or can this get? How worse will it get? Could it be? Your unconscious mind will make up pictures in your mind of how things could be so disastrous, traumatic.  You know, all totally understandable, by the way, all totally understandable, but yet they don't do a fucking thing. It makes things worse, all natural, all natural. But so is the answer.  You see, I'm going to ask you a question. How's all that working for you when you do that? How's it working for you? I'll tell you how it's working for you. It's not working at all, not at all.  You know, all that talking, wallowing, those questions, your unconscious mind is just going to go into overdrive to try to answer you, and find answers that fit. And it just doesn't work, does it? So I'm pleased now that I've made you feel so much better. Or could I made you feel any worse? Because dying like that will only get worse, by the way.  And again, that's what we do, because we sort of give up hope a little bit. Because I can't get, I want to keep going in my, these old quotation marks, professional help. Because there's all sorts of professional help.  And some are really good. And some will maybe drag things out for me too long. I hear people being years in therapy.  I asked myself, why would you spend years in therapy when you can change pretty quickly? Now, let's consider professional help. Now, you know what I think about professional help? Professional help for me would be going to see a hypnotherapist who's a master hypnotist. Absolutely brilliant at hypnosis.  Being able to talk to your unconscious mind and guide it into finding new ways. An NLP, I say that again, an NLP practitioner as well. If you get a master practitioner, good, but a practitioner of NLP, who's practiced NLP, who loves NLP, puts it with hypnosis.  Oh my, you are going to get something good. And then add to that timeline therapist. You have got, for me, the three cores of therapy that create instant change, or virtually instant change.  Now you could say, well, I can't afford it. But think about this. Some of us can afford it.  Can be, you know, but if you think about three sessions, what would happen if you just saved up for three sessions? Do your best if you could. And there's this one option, by the way, not the only option. I'm just considering how you could try to get a therapist.  So you find a gets things done quickly. And then you ask them, you know, how much and all this stuff, and then you save up for it. Because you want to keep it pretty, pretty tight.  You don't want one a month. Because in that month in between things come back and bite you on the bum. You want it done quickly, get the momentum going.  Now you can ask, do you do concessionary rates? Because I honestly can't afford it. And if you honestly can't afford it, most therapists that I know of will go, I can help your will. And maybe you can repay that, because you've got a skill that they don't have.  Even if it's only cutting the grass, cleaning the windows, you know, doing something, maybe you're good at websites, you know, or internet, things like that will just, you know, you barter. So if you just look at your options, find a good therapist, look at your options. But what if you can't do that? That's the question, isn't it? I honestly cannot do that.  I have no money whatsoever. Okay, I've got no money whatsoever. So what are we going to do? Give up? No.  Well, I'm just saying that, again, just to shake you up a little bit. Because who would suggest giving up? You might feel like giving up. But no, that's not an option.  Giving up is not an option. Because there's loads that we can do. There is, you can do things for yourself.  Because that's what a therapist is really doing, is helping you heal yourself. That's all they're doing. They just know some processes.  And you can get not lazy, but you can get them to do it with you. It's not a do-to. Because if you think it's a do-to, you ain't going to get the result.  It's a do-with. You work with your therapist. So what are these loads of things you can do? By yourself, with yourself.  And the thing is, when you do that, you do start, guess what? You feel empowered. Once you just start on the road, even though you might not know exactly where you're going, I'm going to help you with that, you will start to feel empowered because you're taking action. Inspired action.  You know, those five keys to success. That's one of the things you could look at. Five keys to success.  And then put your issue into that five keys to success with what I'm going to tell you now. See, here's the very first thing. And you're going to be shocked.  You really will be shocked. Because the very first thing is, bugger off out for a walk. That's it.  Just get outside. Every bloody day. Get outside.  Whether you walk, whether you jog, whether you run. You just go outside. Walking is excellent.  Just walk at a little pace. Get the heart pumping. Just walk.  And not, yeah, I can't walk very far, Paul. Great. Don't walk very far.  And then tomorrow, walk a little bit farther. And then the next day, walk a little bit farther. You know, 10 yards further every day.  You'll get there. And when you're walking, sometimes you can just stop. And guess what? Bloody breathe.  I said, just breathe for a moment or two, and then walk. Carry on walking. Look for the beauty while you're walking.  Because there's so many wondrous things you can see. Look up into the rooftop. You'll see different architecture.  You'll see different things in buildings. If you're outside, you'll see the trees. Like me, I've got a clifftop.  I can see the sea, but all other things. You have to do it though. It's so simple.  And the reason it's simple is because it just bloody works. And it works because it's so bloody simple. All you have to do is do it.  And to do it, you have to do it by, you know, put it in your diary every day. Mark off when you're going to go for a walk and stick to it. Unless anything really dramatic, traumatic takes you away.  And then you reschedule for that day. Get some movement in your body. Breathe outside.  Oh, but it's raining. It's cold. I don't care.  Wrap up. Walk. And I want you to get a little, whether it's one of those big diaries with squares of every day, or whether you make up a little thing with one to 31 and they're little squares.  And at the top of those squares, it's my walking. And every day you put a cross or a tick and you keep that going. You do not let that chain break because it's only bloody walking, but you'll be amazed what happens when you walk.  One is obviously you're breathing, you're doing, your body's getting better, some endorphins or whatever chemicals happen makes you feel good. But also it clears your mind to think of new things. And what about those things? What about those things? Well, here's the things I want you to do in between your walking.  And it is writing it down. And you might go, Oh, Paul, not writing it down. Look, do you want to get better or not? Do you want to get more into life or not? Because if you do, you have to put some effort in.  And writing is not effort. And if you don't type it, if you can help it, please don't type it. Write them down because I want you to feel it in your fingers.  Let the words come through that pen, through your muscle. And the first thing I want you to do is write out how you feel right now. And I don't want, Oh, I'm feeling down.  I'm feeling depressed because you're not depressed unless you are depressed by the way. But that's so vague. And it's probably untrue.  You're not depressed. You might be just sad. You might be feeling a little guilty.  You might be feeling a little frustrated. You might be feeling a little bit lonely. But go through those emotions.  Try to go below that, you know, I'm feeling depressed. Well, what about my depression? And it's not depression maybe. But let's say it's not depression.  Let's look for the things. Well, actually, you know, it's down. And my down feeling is, well, it's not in every context, is it? You know, when you're asleep, you're probably not down.  You know, when you have your breakfast, you might be, you might not be. What are the contexts in which you feel these feelings? And they may change from context to context. Now, I feel unconfident in this context.  What about unconfidence? What is it? Well, it's an anxiety about. Try to find the little abouts. So when that person looks at me, well, you know, it's only that one person at work that gives me that anxiety.  But that's creating that anxiety about the whole day at work. Now I've got specific. It's only that sod over there.  Okay, that's what we do. Write them down. And keep those contexts nice and clear.  Because if you keep them clear, you'll know exactly when, where and how you do what you're doing now. Because you have to know what, how you feel. And you know that because you know that because you're feeling it right now, you're doing this.  And this all is behavior, by the way, you are doing these behaviors. And can you change your behavior in a bloody instant? So write them down. And then I want you to do the reverse.  How do you want to feel? I want to feel happy. No, you don't. Happy is so bloody.  Well, for a start, it's so general, too big. And it's not gonna be in every context. Because, you know, being happy in every context is not the right thing.  You know, if we're going to a funeral, we don't want to seem happy. You're happy we had those people in our lives. But you know, it's not a sad, a sad occasion, rightfully so.  It's appropriate. So I want you to be again, as specific, you know, there's times when I want to be enthused. There's times when I want to feel motivated.  There's times when I feel connected. And what about that connection? What about that motivation? Well, exactly about what? What will it give me? Go into the specifics and develop the richness of what you want in all its lovely layers. Because the thing is, when you write the things out what you want, guess what? You have to feel them.  And the other thing about them is you've had to have felt them before. Because if you didn't know what they were, you wouldn't be able to say how you want to feel. So if you felt them before, we can feel them again.  That's it. Because they're behaviours. And that's what we do.  Now you see, the next bit is seeing the difference between how you feel now, and how you want to feel. And what I want you to do is, like, on a piece of paper, you write down, here's that little bit I'm feeling in that particular context, and here's how I want to feel in that context. And in between, we're going to put, I don't know, four, maybe four or five boxes, little marks, gaps, something you write a little bit in.  Because each one is a step. Because going from how you feel now to how you want to feel is a bloody great big step. Too big to do in one go.  But if you're feeling sad, say, well, maybe you could go from sad to bored. Not a big jump, is it? And bored's a lot better than feeling sad. So I'm going to bored.  And what comes after boredom? Well, boredom, I could be, I don't know, or just that little bit, little bit more excited, just a little excited, not a lot, but just a little bit. So that's the next one. And you work out those intermediate steps.  Because now you have got a way, a path to go from how you're feeling now, to how you want to feel. And you see, you go for each one. And it doesn't really matter how long it's going to take.  It's not going to take very long because you can change from feeling the way you feel now to, say, being bored. How do you do that? Think of a time when you were bored. If we take bored for the example, think of a time when you felt bored before in the past.  Go back in your mind, see what you saw, hear what you heard, be there in that memory and feel bored. Oh, bloody hell, is it that easy? Yeah, feel that bored, that boredom and start, open your eyes and start being bored. You know, being bored with the way you used to feel is a good place to start.  I'm just bored. And then as you get used to feeling bored for a little while, think of the next one. Think of a time when you had it.  Think of one specific, there will be specific times, by the way, in the past, not general, specific time in the past. Go back to that specific time again in your mind. Remember, it doesn't have to be 2020 vision.  Just remember it. Just an awareness will do. Go back into that time.  See what you saw, hear what you heard and feel the bloody feelings. And as you feel those feelings, open your eyes and start living those feelings. Act as if you have those feelings now.  Act as if part of the five keys to success. Yeah. And that's what we're going to do.  And what you're going to do, because you've got this plan, you're going to schedule it, even if it's one day at a time in between your walking. So today I'm going to feel the way I feel. Tomorrow I'm going to feel bored.  And the day after that, I'm going to feel a little excited. The next day after that, I'm going to feel enthused. The next day after that, I'm going to get some energy.  That's what you're going to do. And you schedule it out and you bloody do it. And I know you're going to say, oh Paul, that's so bloody simple to think about.  It is. And the reason it's simple is because it works. And the reason it works is because it's simple.  And we haven't worried about the why. Why all this is happening. No, we're going to say, this is what I want.  And the thing is, more you think about what you want, guess what happens? You could ask those questions. What would it be like to feel that way? What would life be like when I get to feel the way I want? They're the questions you're going to, you know, how could, how good could this get? The opposite to all of those negative questions. And get your unconscious mind going in and finding those things of how good it could be.  It will find opportunities for you to be there. And especially when you keep bloody walking up, because you don't stop. Keep moving, because what you'll find is as you're moving and you're walking and seeing the beauty of the world, you stop to breathe.  You can go and think about the way you want to feel the end result, because that's the feeling of the wish fulfilled. So you just go into that feeling and feel it. Really feel it.  Yes, I've said it's a big jump, but we're just feeling it now. We're not doing it. We're just feeling it.  The more you feel it, the more you're telling your unconscious mind, this is the direction we're headed. This is my goal. This is my aim in mind.  This is where we're going to go. How good could it get? And how safe will I be when I get that feeling? Because I'll be a lot more safer than I was when I was feeling that old way. And it's not not difficult and it doesn't take too long, does it? No, you can just play with it.  Have fun. And just make sure that you're not entertaining any negative stuff or negative people. Keep clear of them.  Don't listen to the news. Social medias can be good for some things, but none of that comparing stuff and none of that stuff that tells you to keep buying stuff and all that. No, you just want uplifting stuff, empowering stuff.  I find those on podcasts. And if you listen to the last little FMQ I did, my favourite podcasts. If you don't know where to look, start with those and then you'll be given, you know, on the app, whatever you choose.  There'll be others that come along and there's some really good uplifting podcasts. There's even one called Personal Development Unplugged, this bloody one. And what I'm going to suggest you do is get your book, a little book and make notes of what you hear.  Don't just listen. Don't just listen. Because if you just listen, when you hear something good, you go, oh, I remember that.  And as you're walking along or doing whatever you're doing in the day, you hear something else, you go, oh, I remember that. One goes in, one goes out. Write them down and then you can review.  Oh, yeah, that's what I'm going to do. And you schedule new things. You're learning new things.  Because what I've asked you to do is not that big. But you can add to it now. Make those notes.  Set your intention when you listen to this stuff. Set your intention. What can I learn from this? I wonder what good things I will notice in this podcast.  What can I learn? And you'll find out then these things will jump out at you when you're listening to those podcasts or you're reading a book. What can I learn from this book? About feeling better. You're telling your unconscious mind, you spot it for me as well.  Then you start asking questions. What else can I do to feel good and safe? Comfortable and safe. You've also got a wonderful set of hypnosis.  There's hypnosis online. My son does a massive app. It isn't very expensive.  Josephcluff.com. I think it's called Joseph Cluff Hypnosis. You can have a look at that. You can come to mine as well.  I've only got 60. He's got thousands. But I've got 65, 70 wonderful processes that you could have.  And they're completely with my compliments. You just go down and look for the one that matches what you're doing right now. There's lots of things of changing your state, setting your goals, the five keys to success, all of that stuff.  Then you can start again, listening, making notes, setting your intention and set your intention when you listen to hypnosis tracks. All there for you. All you have to do for mine is go to paulcluffonline.com forward slash podcast.  And then you can sign up and have access to those whenever you like. You can download them and things like that. And you can ask people.  Ask people for, well, some advice. But I don't really know anybody, Paul. I don't know anybody to ask.  You don't really? Have you asked me? No, you haven't. Send me an email. Feedback at personaldevelopmentunplugged.com. Send me a little email of where you are, how you feel, what you want to feel.  And I'll either point you in the right direction or we'll come up with a longer podcast that will address your issue. And what did it cost you? Nada. Apart from a little bit of time.  And all these things don't cost you nothing. Everything I've said now has cost you nothing. And all the time you're walking, you're moving, taking in that fresh air, breathing.  That's it. So the excuse of but I can't afford a therapist doesn't hold water anymore. Because you can find your own way as well.  Okay. I hope you enjoyed that. I hope that I've inspired you to take action, inspired action, massive, continual action.  That is the second key to success. The second key. Have a listen to that.  I've got a couple of episodes and the five cases it says, I've got a hypnosis track to get it installed within you. So have a listen to those. Start taking the action that you need.  And the first one is, when am I going to walk today? There you go. Now I got my list and then I'm gonna do this. You know, everything is available to you and it costs absolutely bugger all.  Do that. So I say, I hope I have conveyed that in an articulated manner. Probably haven't, but I hope I have.  If I haven't, let me know and I'll expound a little bit better. Please tell people what you've learned from this. Because they might say, well, it's not happening to me.  But the advice is really good. Here's what I heard. Teach people.  They might be the ones that just need it. And then share this podcast, if you would. Share it to anyone, because anyone and everyone, because they just might need it.  You'll be doing them a good turn. You really will. And it'll make me feel happy too.  And if you want to mention me in all the podcasts in your social media, that would be awesome too. Just tag me in. Okay.  Have more fun than you can stand. And guess what? Sometimes just feel happy for no reason. See you in another longer podcast or a five minute wiki.  So the 90 seconds of hypnosis tracks. Why have I put hypnosis tracks on a separate website? Well, it's so simple, really. I wanted you to have them all in one place.  So you can look through them all, you can find the particular one you want. I've even made them downloadable. So you can put them on any of your playing devices that you prefer.  You don't need Wi Fi, you don't need the iTunes or whatever, you can put them anywhere you like. You can even burn them onto disk if you want. Where'd you get them? Well, there you go.  I told you it's pawcluffonline.com forward slash podcast. If you're worried about your email address, please don't be because they stay totally safe with me. I only use them to send you out that email and give you access.  Simple as that. I send you a link, a special link, so you and only you can access those hypnosis tracks because I want them just for you. And the other thing about this is you've taken responsibility.  I don't want to make these open to everyone, just random. You have taken responsibility to listen and be part of this community of personal development. And I want to help you.  I want to help you personally to get your dreams, your goals, and therefore I'm giving you these tools, these protocols, these paradigms, whatever you want to call them, but in deep hypnosis. So just enjoy. Have more fun than you can stand with hypnosis.  Transcribed by TurboScribe.ai. Go Unlimited to remove this message. Personal development [self improvement] [self development] [NLP] [Hypnosis]