Menu
Sign In Search Podcasts Libraries Charts People & Topics Add Podcast API Blog Pricing
Podcast Image

Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast

Are You Rubbish? w/ Ari Shaffir!

18 Jun 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is discussed at the start of this section?

0.149 - 3.434

Gang, Tootie's got a limited 4th of July drop coming at ya.

0

3.814 - 3.954 Kevin Ryan

Mm-hmm.

0

3.974 - 9.041

We got some nice t-shirts. Show up to the barbecue looking fresh, clean, and patriotic.

0

9.061 - 14.429 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, don't be a bozo. Available at rugarbage.com while supplies last. Happy 4th of July.

0

15.049 - 26.746

Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is All You Rubbish. Hello. Well, so it is then. It's a show where we sit down with your favorite comedians and find out if they turned out to be classy.

26.766 - 29.97 Ari Shaffir

That's all we got. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha.

30.811 - 33.397

Or if they're just a big old piece of trash.

Chapter 2: How does the podcast introduce the guest?

33.477 - 54.483

Isn't it? I'm your host, Dave Foley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Tootie's in the new edition. She's upstairs. She got the lanterns ready. All right? One if by sea, two if by Toyota minivan. That was a Hasidic joke. That's America. Mike Coates is coming to you from right next to me. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage?

0

54.504 - 62.117

Bit of an international businessman, but born right here in America. Stands up for the stars and stripes. Give it up for KJ and Kevin James Ryan.

0

62.097 - 79.604 Kevin Ryan

I feel like I'm going to be doing a lot of heavy lifting. What's up, gang? Shout out to you. As always, thanks for tuning in. Please make sure you rate, view, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. Full video available on Spotify. Now, boys are climbing the frigging charts over there. And obviously, the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com. Slash, are you garbage?

0

79.664 - 88.898 Kevin Ryan

Join that like a goddamn patriot. That's right. Not a fucking Benedict Cumberbatch.

0

88.878 - 99.794

Gang, we couldn't be more excited to have our incredibly, and I mean incredibly, special guest back with us again today. It's his last time before he heads overseas, starts kissing the crown over there.

100.094 - 103.9 Kevin Ryan

Bit of a fucking turncoat. All right. USA all the way.

104.18 - 106.303

On the goddamn centennial, too, by the way.

106.343 - 106.684 Kevin Ryan

I know.

106.824 - 114.375

Coming up on Fourth of July. I'm a goddamn 76, baby. I don't like this shit. Give it up. Ferrari. Schaefer, everybody.

Chapter 3: What are the cultural differences mentioned regarding travel?

524.27 - 528.137

I want to see if you're going to embarrass yourself over there, cause an international incident, be sent back.

0

528.217 - 546.128 Ari Shaffir

I'm going to try. I'm going to try my best. People say I'm going to get arrested, and I'm like, do you know how much that'll skyrocket my career? We've had cancellations. We've never had arrests here. What are the weird, what are the, what's the. Buck and shackles. Scotland Yard. Oh, the yard. I'll get one of those pipes to go like that. You're not to detect. Solve crimes.

0

546.268 - 548.893 Ari Shaffir

Where's the best sales here?

0

549.481 - 552.505 Kevin Ryan

What are the weed laws in London?

0

553.206 - 574.172 Ari Shaffir

Oh, they're not like us. Yeah, no. Yeah, you're going to be. You got kicked out. Me and I forget who it was, an L.A. comic. We're in Edinburgh at an outside pop-up bar. It was like inside and we're in the courtyard and we lit up joints. And the bouncer's like, are you fucking crazy? That's pretty crazy. In an establishment? In the outside area. And he goes, would you do that where you're from?

574.272 - 578.577 Ari Shaffir

And we're like, dude, yes, that's why we both did it. This is completely normal where we are.

580.092 - 580.673 Kevin Ryan

Huh.

580.733 - 581.575

It's not legal over there?

581.735 - 583.238 Kevin Ryan

What do you got, Luke? I don't think so.

Chapter 4: How do the hosts discuss British slang and customs?

881.404 - 883.105 Ari Shaffir

Who's the lead singer of the Rolling Stones? Robert Plant.

0
0

886.087 - 886.408 Kevin Ryan

Is it?

0

886.648 - 886.949 Ari Shaffir

No.

0

887.971 - 895.608 Kevin Ryan

It's fucking Mick Jagger. Oh, yeah. You're going to get your ass kicked over there. Which I don't know if I wanted to be British, but I wanted to be American. My boy can't be a fucking turncoat on me.

895.628 - 901.902 Ari Shaffir

They're going to be playing paint it black in a bar. You'll be like, I love the Beatles. What are they? They have beer pong? What's their beer pong over there?

901.882 - 902.864 Kevin Ryan

They probably, I don't know.

902.964 - 904.126 Ari Shaffir

Tennis. Tennis.

904.547 - 905.308

On a grass court.

Chapter 5: What topics are covered before discussing British beer preferences?

2093.129 - 2096.232 Kevin Ryan

1.5, 1.33. It's 1.34. Man, you're Jewish.

0

2096.413 - 2100.437 Ari Shaffir

Damn it. He gets the trades. Let's keep that war in Iran going. We'll get that number down.

0

2101.498 - 2104.701 Kevin Ryan

So are you getting, you're going over there, you're getting jammed up.

0

2105.761 - 2114.076 Ari Shaffir

What do you mean? You're losing money. You're losing money. No, but this shit costs less. You get a shot of whiskey for $2.90. That's what you're focused on? If that'd be here, it'd be five bucks.

0

Chapter 6: How do comedians describe their experiences with British culture?

2114.096 - 2115.96

That's what your economic plan is based on?

0

2116.32 - 2119.847 Ari Shaffir

A whiskey shot of whiskey. It's all scotch. I'm just putting all my money in scotch.

0

2119.947 - 2130.265 Kevin Ryan

You have a British beer that you like drinking. You don't go there and don't drink the cheap fucking Croatian beer. Look at this piece of trash. Cider, bro! Beer. Mead.

0

2130.285 - 2131.507 Ari Shaffir

Fucking garbage person.

0

2131.587 - 2133.389 Kevin Ryan

You get the balls on this guy last night? Cider.

Chapter 7: What are the differences between Britain, England, and the UK?

2133.449 - 2136.393 Kevin Ryan

I'm sitting there drinking a Budweiser. American beer.

0

2136.453 - 2141.098 Ari Shaffir

Budweiser, yeah. It's actually, I believe it was a Czech beer. There is a Czech Budweiser still around.

0

2141.218 - 2143.561 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, I think it was the same. Or maybe there's no relation.

0

2143.581 - 2144.843 Ari Shaffir

I spit in your face.

0

2144.883 - 2152.272 Kevin Ryan

Slap the shit out of me. Budweiser. I think it might have been the same family. But anywho. Anywho sounds British.

2152.252 - 2177.126 Kevin Ryan

i go he goes he's already trying to be he thinks he's classier than he is and he goes he's across he doesn't even come over like there's like 15 feet he's talking over people he goes what kind of beer is budweiser like he's like contemplating is it a lager he goes i go i think a lager he comes over here is it a pilsner he starts reading my label i go get the You won't want her not, dickhead.

2177.146 - 2180.533 Kevin Ryan

Fucking getting over here. Meanwhile, then I got to pay for his beers. I got wings coming here.

2180.853 - 2182.516 Ari Shaffir

Here, let me show you how I'm going to go into every bar.

Chapter 8: How do comedians react to British social norms and humor?

2182.637 - 2187.005 Ari Shaffir

This is because I do do this in England, and I love it. It's this. Come in. Sit at the bar.

0

2187.246 - 2187.847 Kevin Ryan

Get beat up.

0

2189.47 - 2197.295 Ari Shaffir

Get beat up. Put your knife down. Let him know you're not in trouble. So you put your knife. You go. Lager. And that's it.

0
0

2198.216 - 2199.877 Ari Shaffir

Yeah. Like you're in a movie. And they'll just punt you on.

2200.558 - 2202.46

Yeah. No blades, no bows. Leave your weapons here.

2202.7 - 2208.586 Kevin Ryan

That's right. That's right. Do you have a brand that you like of? I hate them all.

2208.926 - 2210.708

What about Bass Ale? Don't like a nice Bass Ale?

2210.828 - 2211.408 Kevin Ryan

Oh, that's theirs?

Comments

There are no comments yet.

Please log in to write the first comment.