Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast
Field Trips Edition w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley
Mon, 19 May
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Are You Garbage is back with Kevin Ryan and H. Foley for a family episode to answer your garbage questions about Field Trips. It's a fun one! Thanks for watching AYG Comedy Podcast. Love youse guys. Come to a live show! AYG 2025 Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows Live Shows: https://areyougarbage.com/pages/live-shows PATREON: https://www.patreon.com/AreYouGarbage MERCH: https://areyougarbage.com/ Sponsored by: Express VPN: Protect your online privacy TODAY by visiting https://ExpressVPN.com/garbage Bilt Rewards: Start paying rent through Bilt and take advantage of your Neighborhood Benefits™ by going to https://joinbilt.com/garbage. Better Help: This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at https://betterhelp.com/garbage and get on your way to being your best self Comedians H. Foley and Kevin Ryan are self proclaimed GARBAGE. Each week a new stand up comedian gets put to the test. Steal shampoo from hotels? Own a George Foreman Grill? Ever worn JNCO Jeans? Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
Chapter 1: What is the Back on the Block tour about?
Live shows, live shows, live shows, baby. The boys are about to hit the road for that Back on the Block tour, so grab the squad and come on out and see us. Yeah.
Welcome to another exciting edition of Are You Garbage? The show where you find out if your favorite comedians are classy individuals or absolute trash. Now, here are your hosts, Kevin Ryan and H. Foley.
Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage? Oh, yeah. It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find it has to be classy. Yeah. Just a big old piece of trash. Trash, trash, trash.
I'm your host, Dave Trolley, coming at you on a beautiful day. We're out back here at Tootie's in a new edition. Shout out to her. Just earned her yellow belt. Okay. Yeah. over there at South Philly Kung Fu and Karate and Pet Store. So good for her. Watch out, man. She's on a tear.
Kick your ass. Okay. My coach is coming at you from across the table. He is the CEO of Are You Garbage and what he lacks in physical appearance. He makes up for it in personality and wild things in the bedroom.
up for kj kevin james ryan everybody what up gang buddy shout out to you thanks for tuning in as always please make sure you rate review subscribe on itunes full video available on youtube full video available over there on spotify by the way those numbers are cooking charts over there i know i got damn charts obviously the greatest website of all time www.patreon.com garbage go over there you get all
All that bonus content.
Yes, sir.
And then last but not least. Talk to me. The Back on the Block Tour fall and winter tour dates are on sale right now at RUGarbage.com. Coming to the Metropolitan in Philadelphia.
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Chapter 2: What is Are You Garbage? and how does it work?
United States representative. What state? Party land. What? I don't know.
I think he did a lot of drugs back in the day. The United States of Funk, if you catch my drift.
Disco land. Mayor of Palm Springs, California, in California's 44th district.
Man, mayor of Palm Springs. Talk about an easy gig. Talk about getting your D.S. You are out there in Palm Springs.
Fucking closing at Boca del Vista. Ain't nothing wrong with that. That's what you do. You get down there to Florida. You relax a little bit. That's what you got to do. Get some color. Go down there to Boca. Take Junior's place. Find a nice lady who works the inventionals department at fucking Sears or something like that. So where's my wife in this mix? I forgot. Gumming up the works.
I don't think they brought that in. Not your wife. I don't know what reality you're creating. First of all, didn't he say Palm Springs, California? You ended up in Florida. Is that right? Is there a Palm Springs, California? That's the Palm Springs. What's Palm Springs in Florida? That's where dudes go to get. Get topped off on spring break. Isn't there a Palm Springs? Palm Beach.
Well, that's where I'm going.
I'll see you out there.
Hey, get on a Palm Beach. Get on a Boca. Relax for a little bit. Walk. Play a little golf. What are you talking to me? I'm doing well. What are you talking about? You get up. You fucking go somewhere. I should. Telling me what to do. You go do something. I should. Take a cruise by myself. Why don't you take a field trip? Hey! And we're back. That's what I did, a little Franklin Institute.
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Chapter 3: What are some memorable field trips from childhood?
No more school themes. Why? Because you just talk about football. No, I don't. It was 48 years ago. I was talking about wrestling. Oh, sorry. The other sport you were mediocre at. Did you go to state? Did you win states? No, I went to states, though. Yeah. Don't work the... I don't know. Your estate. I got two congressmen. Sonny Bono. You done being rude?
No, you also. I mean, I was also like, I could have been in the band. I could have just stopped there. But then you had to go back to... But sitting in them stands come Friday night, the lights on, no way. But in the winter and shit, it would have been fun. You watch the team lose through halftime, and then you're like, I can't do it no more.
You take your tube off because you were playing the tuba, and you know it. And I would have done the drum. And they'd be like, Henry, Henry, no, we need you. We need you for the halftime show. I could have done both. I can't let my team down. I could have done both. You run in, the coach goes, what took you so long?
Like you're fucking Shane Falco or something. Hold my reed. Shane Fatso. All right. Okay. I'm a buffoon. Oh, me too. This is a question I have for you because I don't think- My door's always open to you. I never liked church and state mingling. What does that mean? Was Patty or your dad ever a chaperone? No. No. No.
No, no, no, no. My mom was worried. Actually, I think I'm wrong. Maybe Patty was once. I feel like I always did maybe once. There was always... My dad never. The way that stuff was is there were parents that were good with that. That was always the same ones. Sure. I don't know. Just an example. Mrs. Jackson. She was good with all the kids. All the kids knew her. That kid could operate...
well in front of his mom and everybody else. He could kind of be himself.
It was normalized for people. It would have not been me and my mom or definitely not my dad. I wouldn't have been able to be myself. We would have been acting in a play. We would have been two different people. You know what I mean? Hello, mother. Oh, mother, can I go? Meanwhile, I'm going through her purse looking for heaters.
Yeah, I wouldn't want her to see what I was really like. That's telling. Bad kid, bad seed. Yeah. She was working anyway. Yes. I gotta work! Uh-huh. Same. My mom was never, like, the class mom or the whatever. When we had to bring the orange slices in the juice box, I was like, hey, drop them off and fucking, you know, hit the high road.
My dad came to the high school once. I mean, they were always at, you know... My mom did a lot for, like, you know, the football, like, my senior, junior, and senior year. Like, you know, she was, like, she had, like, the... The night before the games. He'd blow the coach to get you playing time. You know, he was supposed to play the tuba. I play the skin flute.
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Chapter 4: What happened during a disastrous field trip?
I got hydrochloric acid diluted. It squirted in my eyes and had to use the fucking thing. Eye flush? Yeah. Yikes. Yeah. It was actually very soothing. Tried to get out of wrestling practice that day. No dice. Mr. Landis wouldn't have it. They needed the kid on the line. He was breeding champions. Another great story about me being a star athlete.
What a fun one, gang. Thank you so much for tuning in. Get the tickets to the Back on the Block Tour. Pick up some cards. The whole nine yards. We love you, and we'll see you next week. Peace.