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Are You Garbage? Comedy Podcast

Naming Your Car! w/ Kevin Ryan & H. Foley

25 May 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What is the main topic of the episode about naming cars?

0.318 - 14.791 Unknown

It's a summertime gang, and the boys are coming to your hometown. We're talking about Portland, Maine, Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania, Cleveland, Ohio. Grab the squad. Let's all hang out. Play a little AYG. Some stand-up comedy. It's going to be a fun, fun time.

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14.811 - 30.886 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, and then the boys are headed to Atlantic City, baby. Down there on the boardwalk. King of the Boards returns to South Jersey. Philadelphia people, Jersey people, get your tickets to Atlantic City. Also, Denver, Colorado. Those tickets are selling very fast. Those will sell out. Get them. We'll be there in July. Love yous. Bye.

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31.027 - 49.309 Unknown

Let's go. Hey, everybody out there, and welcome back to everybody's favorite podcast. This is Are You Garbage? Oh, yeah. It's that little show we sit down with your favorite comedians, and we find that it's a group to be classy. Yeah. But they're just a big old piece of trash. Garbage. I'm your host, Dave Trolley, coming at you.

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49.289 - 75.887 Unknown

on a beautiful day we're out back here at tooties in the new edition summertime maybe not officially okay but it's summertime all right you know i know that why because the nair's been brought out okay been all cleaned up on you or her what i don't know how do you know that it's all been cleaned up she told me okay plus the hair all over the bathroom i don't know what you guys are talking about when it looks like sasquatch got caught in there i caught in a glue trap in the bathroom

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75.867 - 79.717 Unknown

And she's out back. Uh-huh. In that leopard bikini she got in 1983.

Chapter 2: How do comedians Kevin Ryan and H. Foley interact with their audience?

79.797 - 82.765 Kevin Ryan

I got to be honest with you, it sounds like you got a bit of a thing for Aunt Tootie.

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82.785 - 83.707 Unknown

What are you talking about?

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83.728 - 84.309 Kevin Ryan

I don't know.

0

84.409 - 86.074 Unknown

I'm painting a picture for the audience.

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86.094 - 88.199 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, you think she's slipping out of your seat over there.

88.219 - 94.876 Unknown

I'm not saying she wasn't something back in the day. Bounce a quarter off that thing. Man, you catch her at Limelight back in the 80s?

95.357 - 96.218 Kevin Ryan

I think you like her.

96.319 - 115.687 Unknown

What are you talking about? You got a bit of a thing for her. Anyway, she's sunbathing outside. Great. Topless. My co-host is coming in from across the tables. We call it a family episode, ladies and gentlemen. Just the boys, the bozos, and the homies. Just the way we like it. Yes. He is my best pal in the whole wide world. What? Bit of an international businessman. Huh? Yeah.

116.568 - 132.839 Kevin Ryan

CEO of Are You Garbage. Ah, I know. CFO. I don't know. On the documents, my title's president. Is it? I think so. Wait, really? What? What am I? VP? I don't think you have a title. I don't have a title. You're a partner.

Chapter 3: What are the funniest car names mentioned in the episode?

144.523 - 154.542 Kevin Ryan

Shout-out to you, as always. Please make sure you rate, review, subscribe on iTunes. Full video available on YouTube. Full video available over there on Spotify. And the boys are climbing the charts, baby. Wait, let me check that.

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155.365 - 155.846 Unknown

Yes, we are.

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157.207 - 168.222 Kevin Ryan

And then obviously the greatest website of all time, www.patreon.com. You go over there, you get all that freaking bonus content, gang. You might be sitting there, I don't know what bonus content is. Get over there and freaking find out.

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168.402 - 189.787 Unknown

And you get the camaraderie of 15,000 homies. Like-minded dirt balls just like yourself. You've been looking for a family, looking for people like yourself your whole life. You'll find it over there on a Patreon at the RU Garbage page. I just said this. You were in the bathroom. That's the second time you said that today. What? Before you were like, you were in the bathroom or something.

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190.067 - 192.689 Unknown

I wasn't in the bathroom that time you were talking earlier.

193.17 - 195.632 Kevin Ryan

I don't even know what we're referencing. What do you mean?

196.192 - 205.421 Unknown

You said last night you were having a conversation with somebody and you were like, you were in the bathroom. I said you might have left or maybe you were in the bathroom. Why do you take offense to that?

205.441 - 218.375 Kevin Ryan

You're putting me in the bathroom. I was in the bathroom here now. I'm getting over being sick. Okay, so last night you couldn't have been in the bathroom as well? Why you get real defensive over whether or not. No, I've never heard anybody draw a line.

218.395 - 223.582 Unknown

I'm flunking off somewhere. You were getting cotton candy or something. I was probably doing push-ups.

Chapter 4: How do childhood experiences influence car naming choices?

254.741 - 278.199 Kevin Ryan

And then I go watch this drive. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. You know, who knows what, In the past, sure. I understand that. I don't know what Luke does when I leave here. I have a pretty good picture. You, I'm not sure. Diesel, I know. Mark the Shark. Diesel makes sausages at the house. Luke pulls tubes at the house. Ripping bingers. All that aside, though, we said like-minded people.

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278.239 - 284.379 Kevin Ryan

I'm very shocked. Let me take a minute to address the army of garbage right here. I said this while you were taking a duke in the bathroom.

0

284.399 - 292.847 Unknown

I was not. Yes, you were. Why are you denying this? I made a big mistake. I tried to make my own Manhattan special with orange-flavored LaCroix and coffee. It stinks.

0

293.508 - 294.669 Kevin Ryan

What's a Manhattan special?

0

294.909 - 297.311 Unknown

Like a soda, coffee soda.

297.492 - 298.032 Kevin Ryan

Is that a thing?

298.352 - 298.633 Unknown

Yeah.

299.013 - 299.253 Kevin Ryan

Okay.

299.273 - 300.234 Unknown

Very popular. Okay.

Chapter 5: What are the most memorable stories shared about cars?

364.001 - 365.665 Kevin Ryan

How about that?

0

366.046 - 366.306 Unknown

Yes.

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366.587 - 393.848 Kevin Ryan

Luke, how about that? How about that? Very nice. How about that? Something else. And obviously, this is a Manhattan. We're in Manhattan. A little more swankier, a little upper echelon, a little bit of class. I was shocked at the amount of classy people who, I mean, at least appear classy that are fans of the show. I was just walking here, parked the car. I'm walking here with Hansi Ponzi.

0
0

394.889 - 420.936 Kevin Ryan

Beautiful girl gets walking out of a cool coffee place. What'd you say? Beautiful girl. A beautiful girl. I was quoting you. Thank you. An attractive young lady. An attractive young lady. Younger than, you know, me or you. Sure. Probably Luke's age. Young. Somebody Luke would hang out with. walks out dressed well, going to her job or something. Something, you know. Meanwhile, Hans is pooping.

420.956 - 437.921 Kevin Ryan

I don't have a fucking, I don't have a poop bag. That's where I'm at. You have one sneaker on. She puts change in my coffee cup. And she goes, huge fan of the pod. And I just, it's like nice to see the garbage that I don't think people are garbage necessarily.

437.941 - 439.623 Unknown

You just let the leash go, start following her.

439.723 - 442.868 Kevin Ryan

Oh, there you go. My friend's in a bathroom.

444.232 - 445.474 Unknown

Yeah, follow yourself in the bathroom.

Chapter 6: How do personal anecdotes shape the conversation?

491.466 - 500.915 Unknown

I'm sure. I just seen a couple at the bagel shop. A couple of kids that were cutting school, trying to go out to Long Beach to go surfing, but they can't because the LIRR is down.

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501.095 - 501.375 Kevin Ryan

Yeah.

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501.516 - 507.041 Unknown

How does it go to Coney Island? I'm like, I can't surf out there. I was like, yeah, you're telling me, bro.

0

507.061 - 524.699 Kevin Ryan

Did you? Okay. What? I don't know. See, you start this shit. I didn't say. What? What did I do? I don't know. I'm sorry. It's not every day you tell me you're talking to surfing teenagers. You got to get me. You got to let me pry a little bit. It wasn't the Beach Boys. Well, I mean, I don't bump into surfing teenagers that often.

0

524.719 - 532.947 Unknown

I didn't have their boards on them and shit like that. Okay. There's a couple. There were kids hanging out. There were three high school kids. Cut in school. Cut in class. That's right.

533.821 - 549.383 Kevin Ryan

I respect that. Me too. You see that in New York and it makes you think, you go, where the fuck are, where are your parents? What are you doing? Probably working. Yeah. Badass little kids running around. You never cut class? Smoking dope? I tried one time and I wrapped my car around a telephone pole.

549.363 - 550.426 Unknown

You never cut school?

550.566 - 564.745 Kevin Ryan

Never again. Wait, really? I tried in 10th grade. I was 16. We were cutting school. We had beers, and we were going to get drunk and go to Rice's, the flea market. Shout out Rice's, every Tuesday and Saturday, I think.

564.926 - 565.026

Yeah.

Chapter 7: What are the cultural references tied to car ownership?

596.087 - 608.613 Kevin Ryan

I was whipping work, as the kid said. Now I'm driving the bus. I'm turning, and I sneezed, and when I came up, I hadn't gone all the way back. And that pole was staring down the barrel.

0

608.693 - 609.975 Unknown

And you really wrapped it around it?

0

610.796 - 621.992 Kevin Ryan

No, I could have touched it. It fucking crunched right up the middle. That airbag went off. Those old school airbags? Hit you. Like I suddenly let off a fucking bottle rocket in that thing.

0

622.172 - 624.356 Unknown

Damn, you never cut school. You cut school all the time.

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624.376 - 636.816 Kevin Ryan

I was, I also, my, I mean, you know, a little bit of a broken home. My mom would go to work and I would just go, hey, she would be at work a lot when I left. When I was supposed to go to school, I'd be like, I'm sick, I'm not going today. Okay, whatever.

637.016 - 637.878 Unknown

That's cutting school.

637.898 - 656.935 Kevin Ryan

Yeah. But the one, yeah, when I tried to like. 12 bowls of cereal later. That and my dad, I'd be like, dad, I'm sick or whatever, you know. But never like, I tried at 16 and it fucking ended terribly. I had the fucking Irish Catholic, you know, that was God telling me, go to class.

657.697 - 668.274 Unknown

And I listened to our mighty father. You ought to come out of the fucking Wuhan lab to get out of fucking going to school with Patty. No, nobody cared. Vicious. Nobody cared. Vicious.

671.159 - 683.218 Kevin Ryan

My nieces and nephews, they're like, oh, we talk about, oh, let's go on vacation. Well, the kids have school. I'm like, fucking who? What are we taught with school? Yeah, you can't do that. Take them out for life. Yeah, you can. I always hated those. That shit don't fucking matter anymore. I always hated those kids.

Chapter 8: How does the episode conclude with audience engagement?

689.969 - 690.289 Unknown

Who?

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690.86 - 692.843 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, Luke went to fucking a chateau or something.

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692.863 - 695.667 H. Foley

Get more experience that way. Sure, I get it.

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695.707 - 701.175 Kevin Ryan

What are they going to read a fucking dingy textbook? Get the fuck out of here. Get out there. Go to Poconos.

0

701.495 - 709.527 Unknown

Great Wolf Lodge. And you would be able to collect your studies and get all your work done before you left or whatever? Got to learn how to drink around the world somehow.

709.507 - 712.151 Kevin Ryan

Yeah, that's an experience, dude.

712.191 - 714.194 Unknown

My parents, I mean, we were vacationing like that.

714.214 - 730.737 Kevin Ryan

Maybe they should have a little bit. It'll be a little more culture. It wouldn't be in a bathroom so much. There's nothing I can do about it now. You can go back to school. I should go back to school. I said that. We should enroll you in, I mean, we tried to enroll you in college, and you said it was Juilliard or nothing, I believe, is what it was. Yeah.

730.757 - 737.286 Kevin Ryan

You guys were supposed to do a creative writing course. Yeah. Okay, we're going to move on from that. Been tiffing a little bit.

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