Armchair Anonymous: Bad Proposals

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Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard 52 min 9 speakers 3 chapters transcribed
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What is the theme of today's Armchair Anonymous episode?

Dax Shepard 0:00
Wondery Plus subscribers can listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free right now. Join Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Or you can listen for free wherever you get your podcasts. Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Randall Shepard. I'm joined by Monica Lilly.
Monica Padman 0:20
Oh, that was cool.
Dax Shepard 0:21
It was hard. Okay. The prompt was bad proposals. Proposals gone wrong.
Monica Padman 0:24
Yes.
Dax Shepard 0:25
But oh my Lord. I mean, this is like tied with that crazy bear attack or shark attack. This goes some places.
Monica Padman 0:33
It really builds this one.
Dax Shepard 0:35
It just gets more and more intense.
Monica Padman 0:38
Yeah.
Dax Shepard 0:39
And then the last one is a nail biter. Wow. Wow. This is a banger.
Monica Padman 0:44
Yeah. Please listen to this one. And happy Valentine's Day.
Dax Shepard 0:47
Oh, is that what it is? Yeah.
Monica Padman 0:48
It was meant to pair up a little bit.
Dax Shepard 0:51
Okay, great. Yeah. Happy Valentine's Day. May your heart be full of love and merriment. And in his name we pray. He has risen.
Monica Padman 1:00
What are you going to do for Valentine's Day? Eat chocolates?
Dax Shepard 1:03
I'll try not to. Yeah. I mostly think of my mom always would ask me to be her Valentine.
Monica Padman 1:09
Oh, that's sweet.
Dax Shepard 1:09
Yeah, and so I'll ask the girls to be my Valentine.
Monica Padman 1:12
That's cute.
Dax Shepard 1:14
And they'll still like it.
Monica Padman 1:16
They'll oblige.
Dax Shepard 1:17
Yeah. Did your dad ever ask you to be his Valentine? Of course not. Yeah. Did you guys do Valentine's Day?
Monica Padman 1:22
We didn't even have it.
Dax Shepard 1:23
Yeah.
Monica Padman 1:24
Well, we did. My mom, no, my mom would sometimes...
Dax Shepard 1:28
Would she get you a box of chocolate?
Monica Padman 1:30
Yeah.
Dax Shepard 1:30
My mom would get us a box of chocolates.
Monica Padman 1:31
I think she would do something nice every now and then.
Dax Shepard 1:34
But I'm not going to get my kids anything because they're already spoiled. They already have too much chocolate.
Monica Padman 1:37
Why don't you tell them that on Valentine's Day? Be my Valentine. I'm not getting you anything.
Dax Shepard 1:40
You're going to repent this Valentine's Day. Please enjoy Bad Proposals. Cole?
How you guys doing?
Dax Shepard 2:07
Good. Can you hear us?
Yeah, I can hear you guys. Can you hear me?
Dax Shepard 2:11
Yes. Where are you, Cole?
All right. I was really worried about the sound quality, so hopefully it's all right. I am in my closet here.
Dax Shepard 2:17
Sound is dynamite. Connection is a little iffy. Are you far from your Wi-Fi? Because we might have to piss Monica off and get you out of the closet.
I'm through four doors. I can go in a different room here.
Dax Shepard 2:28
Now we're getting a nice tour of your home. I can go to the home office here. Somehow got worse. I hate to say this.
Monica Padman 2:36
So I was right.
Dax Shepard 2:37
We've lost the visual of you. Can I ask one last thing? Would you be willing to go to that first room you walked into?
Because it was dynamite in there. My wife is getting ready for work here.
Dax Shepard 2:47
Oh, sorry. Our apologies. Sorry. Now we've got great image. We've got great sound. Hi. Tell her we say hi. She's stressed. She says hello. All right. Now we're talking. Cole, where are you? I'm in Billings, Montana. That explains the spotty Wi-Fi.
Yep. This story may or may not involve some other spotty cell service areas. Okay, great. Are you from Billings? No. So I'm originally from Stroudsburg, Pennsylvania.
Dax Shepard 3:17
What brought you to Montana?
Work.
Dax Shepard 3:19
You're a strong man. You've got broad shoulders. Are you doing something physical?
I am not. I'm actually a chemical engineer, but I do work at a refinery.
Dax Shepard 3:28
Are you lifting incredibly heavy test tubes all day?
That's right. I load them up with the lead and all the other heavy things. Okay, great.
Dax Shepard 3:36
Cole, hit us with this bad proposal.
The bulk of it is in Billings, Montana. I've lived here for about four years now. I was proposing to my girlfriend at the time, just to give a little bit of backstory. Met on New Year's Eve, very high school musical. We like to kind of think that we're a Every New Year's Eve after we kind of celebrate our anniversary, we both like to ski. So we'll go up to the mountains and make a whole weekend out of it. Flash forward to March of 2021. And I'm thinking about proposing. I buy the ring, but I'm planning the proposal and I want to get engaged New Year's Eve. The whole plan is we're going to go to Park City. We're going to ski. We're going to have beautiful time in the mountains. It's going to be a gorgeous proposal. Get engaged.

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