Armchair Anonymous: Stalking III

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Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard 53 min 2 speakers 7 chapters transcribed 2 months ago
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What is the main topic discussed in this episode?

Dax Shepard 0:00
Welcome, welcome, welcome to Armchair Anonymous. I'm Dan Shepard. I'm joined by Lily Padman, who's currently trying to look up a fact to disprove me on something.
Monica Padman 0:09
It's an opinion, really.
Dax Shepard 0:10
But I'll carry right on. Today is, this is a big trigger warning episode in that it's stalking part three. So, you know, stalking is going to have all the stuff you might expect in stalking.
Monica Padman 0:22
It's really tough.
Dax Shepard 0:23
It's really tough, but it was really good, too. It was. Yeah, incredible.
Monica Padman 0:28
I recommend listening to this one.

What trigger warning should listeners know before ‘Stalking Part 3’ begins?

Announcer (Armchair Anonymous intro) 0:29
Please enjoy Stalking Part 3.
Monica Padman 0:54
Oh, I got your shirt.
Callie (caller) 0:56
Iron Cherry. That looks so cute on you.
Dax Shepard 1:00
Yeah, it does.
Callie (caller) 1:01
Stop. I can't take in a compliment from you right now. Fantastic. Thank you so much.
Dax Shepard 1:07
What time zone are you in?
Monica Padman 1:08
Central.
Dax Shepard 1:09
Central. Wow.
Monica Padman 1:11
That feels special. I'm already so sad you got stalked.
Dax Shepard 1:15
Oh, sure.
Monica Padman 1:15
But I also get it because you're so cute. I had a sex dream about Brad Pitt last night.
Dax Shepard 1:20
You did? Yeah. Can we pause, Kelly, to hear Monica's sex dream about Brad Pitt?
Monica Padman 1:24
I would love to.
Dax Shepard 1:26
Yeah, yeah.
Monica Padman 1:26
I don't really remember the details. We were just having sex.
Dax Shepard 1:29
It just cut to you having sex or you were on a date?
Monica Padman 1:33
Yeah, we were hanging out and flirty.
Dax Shepard 1:36
Okay.
Monica Padman 1:37
There was a lot of really good kissing.
Dax Shepard 1:39
Oh, there was a lot of kissing.
Monica Padman 1:41
He's so hot, you guys, especially in my dream. I agree.
Callie (caller) 1:47
But he didn't stalk you, unfortunately. No. Sadly, this was maybe the opposite of Brad Pitt.
Dax Shepard 1:52
Oh, no.
Callie (caller) 1:53
We'll get there. Okay.
Dax Shepard 1:55
So, Kelly, you're in the central time zone. You have a really adorable leopard and or hyena print curtain behind you.
Callie (caller) 2:01
Thank you for noticing. They are blankets from my girls' rooms. And there's a frozen one that you can't see. I almost put it behind me, but that felt like too aggressive.
Dax Shepard 2:10
No, we're not afraid. We're not afraid of affection. Okay, so please set the scene for us. What happened? What year?
Callie (caller) 2:17
So to set the scene, this happened in my hometown where I still live in Springfield, Illinois. So we're three hours south of Rob's hometown of Chicago. We're in the land of Lincoln.
Dax Shepard 2:28
Okay, great, great, great.
Callie (caller) 2:30
This took place in 2002 when I was 16 years old.
Dax Shepard 2:34
That's too young for a seducker. I already don't like it.
Callie (caller) 2:36
Bad news. So one thing about me, I'm a lifelong scaredy cat. So I was that friend at the haunted houses that would wait in the car because even to wait in the parking lot just felt too risky. That's the level of scaredy cat that we're dealing with. And my friends knew this about me and they loved messing with me, especially one friend in particular. And it was that friend who was sleeping over at my house on the night that this all began. So as we were falling asleep in my room, she asked if I noticed someone outside of my window. And I know that that sounds alarming to you, but she would jump scare me all the time and just was constantly keeping me on my toes. So I really didn't think anything of it.
Callie (caller) 3:18
I brushed her off. I told her to knock it off and just go to bed. And for whatever reason, she just like went along with it. And I don't know if she convinced herself she didn't see anything or she was just that tired. Either way, we went to bed. That was that. So a few days later, my mom came into the house after mowing our grass. And she asked me if I'd been sneaking people in through my window. I said no. And I asked her why. Well, when she was mowing the side yard, she found an empty case of beer right outside of my window.
Dax Shepard 3:49
Oh, my gosh. This person just fucking haphazardly left the evidence.
Callie (caller) 3:53
It's important to note here that we had those retro like vertical slat hanging blinds. I don't know if you remember that. Yes. So to close those blinds, they would be flush like side by side and they would be flush against the window. Well, mine were broken. And so when I would try to close them all the way, they would get tangled up. So I would just set them to almost closed. So they were stacked kind of by each other, but they were at an angle. That's important to note because the person outside of the window could just stand at an angle and see into the room very clearly. So my mom found this case of beer and all of the bottles were still inside, but they were all empty.

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