Do it with a broken heart

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Before Breakfast 6 min 1 speaker 7 chapters transcribed
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What is the opening message and who are the hosts of this episode?

Laura Vanderkam 0:00
This is an iHeart Podcast. Guaranteed human.
Lexi Iwanu 0:05
Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Iwanu. We're two best friends, 22 years apart, but so close at heart. And
Lisa DiGiulio 0:16
I'm Lisa DiGiulio, the old one, which means we have wildly different references, occasionally different opinions. And at this point in my 50s, I've lived it all.
Lexi Iwanu 0:24
Now in my 30s, being the founder of New Shoes, good taste
Unknown 0:28
is my business. Listen on the iHeartRadio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you get your podcasts.
Laura Vanderkam 0:39
Welcome to Before Breakfast, a production of iHeartRadio.

How does the host define the “believe you can do it” tip and why is it important?

Laura Vanderkam 0:45
Good morning. This is Laura. Welcome to the Before Breakfast podcast. Today's tip is to believe you can do what you want to do, even when circumstances are less than ideal. Today's tip, like several others this week, comes from my new book, Big Time, A Simple Path to Time Abundance. In the book, I talk about my months-long experience with excruciating back pain. I never really figured out what caused it. One evening in January 2024, the nerves in my back started firing to the point where I couldn't walk. The next few days were pretty rough.
I
Laura Vanderkam 1:29
And I say that as someone who has experienced natural childbirth. Steroids calmed the initial inflammation, but after that I was left with a dull but still chronic ache that made everyday activities like emptying the dishwasher challenging.

What personal back‑pain experience does the host share and how did it change their outlook?

Laura Vanderkam 1:46
If you listen to this show, you probably suspect that I didn't like living as an invalid. And so after months of physical therapy didn't help, I decided I could not put my life on hold forever. I would just live my life with pain as a companion. Taylor Swift has a famous song called I Can Do It With a Broken Heart. And I adopted a version of this as my philosophy. I can do it with chronic back pain. Just like her emotional pain was real, so was my back pain. And just like she could sing and dance and smile and tour and perform anyway... I could work and parent and do most of the things I would have done without back pain. So I committed to doing just that. I went with my family to Disney World. I took my boys to Spain and walked thousands of steps a day.

How does the “I can do it with a broken heart” philosophy translate to everyday life?

Laura Vanderkam 2:43
I went to a Taylor Swift concert and stood for five hours in the floor area because there weren't seats. Eventually, my back pain did ease, but I am glad I didn't put my life on hold waiting for that to happen. because I would have missed out on a lot. Now, I recognize that sometimes this philosophy just doesn't work. I could not have lived life in the pain I was in in the first few days. But in many cases, we are wise not to wait for perfect conditions to get started on our projects and goals. We can do what we want in the conditions we currently have. This doesn't mean setting unrealistic expectations. It means setting realistic expectations rather than abandoning a goal simply because conditions aren't perfect.
Laura Vanderkam 3:36
Want to study for the bar exam? But you are waking up with a baby multiple times per night? I can study sleep-deprived.

What real‑world examples (Disney, Spain, concert) illustrate living with pain?

Laura Vanderkam 3:45
Do you want to go to New Zealand but you don't make a lot of money? I can travel on a budget. Hoping to get in shape, but you go straight from work to family responsibilities in the evenings? I can exercise before 6 a.m. If you find yourself saying you can't do something, reconsider. Figure out what you could do now, under your current circumstances, and then just try. You can even cheer yourself along with a Taylor Swift-inspired mantra. I can do it with whatever constraint you currently face. In many cases, we are a lot stronger than we think we are. In the meantime, this is Laura. Thanks for listening. And here's to making the most of our time.

Why does the host stress realistic expectations over waiting for perfect conditions?

Laura Vanderkam 4:47
Thanks for listening to Before Breakfast. If you've got questions, ideas, or feedback, you can reach me at laura at lauravandercam.com. Before Breakfast is a production of iHeart Media. For more podcasts from iHeart Media, please visit the iHeart Radio app, Apple Podcasts, or wherever you listen to your favorite shows.
Lexi Iwanu 5:23
Lisa, tell them about our new show. We have a new podcast. It's called Don't Lie to Me. I'm Lexi Iwanu.

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