08 - 7 Reglas De Oro Para Vivir En Pareja - John Gorman
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5 a.m., I'm up with a crisp Celsius energy drink. Running 12 miles today. Grab a green juice, quick change, and head to work. Meetings, workshops, one more Celsius, no slowing down. Working late, but obviously still meeting the girls for a little dancing. Celsius, live, fit, go. Grab a cold, refreshing Celsius at your local retailer or locate now at Celsius.com. Close your eyes, exhale, feel your body relax, and let go of whatever you're carrying today. Well, I'm letting go of the worry that I wouldn't get my new contacts in time for this class. I got them delivered free from 1-800-CONTACTS. Oh my gosh, they're so fast. And breathe. Oh, sorry. I almost couldn't breathe when I saw the discount they gave me on my first order.
Oh, sorry. Namaste. Visit 1-800-CONTACTS.com today to save on your first order. 1-800-CONTACTS.
What makes a marriage work? What makes a marriage happy? The eternal question to which no one has an answer, even perhaps the publication of this book. Dr. John Gottman from the United States studied more than 400 couples and was able to predict with 91% effectiveness if they were going to divorce or not. Based on this, he wrote this book, The 100 Principles to Make Marriage Work. Arrancamos con otro episodio de Bibliotequeando. Como siempre, les habla su anfitrión, Ricardo Lugo, arroba Bibliotequeando en las redes. Sigan compartiendo la cuenta, dando like, siguiendo, promoviendo el podcast 5 estrellas para seguir mejorando nuestro conocimiento y cultura a través de los libros. También se pueden suscribir al blog de Bibliotequeando, donde yo escribo distintos artículos sobre distintos temas de los libros que hacemos en el podcast y otros que no forman parte de esta lista.
El link lo encuentran en la descripción de este podcast o en el link de las cuentas de las redes sociales. This book is based, as I told you, on the findings of Dr. John Gottman, a psychologist, in his so-called laboratory of love, a room where he interviewed all these couples and with time and taking the date he was receiving, he could predict in less than 5 minutes, with more than 90% of effectiveness, if a marriage, if a couple was going to divorce or if they were going to continue together. And with this he determines these 7 principles with which he writes the book. But before I explain these principles, I want to tell you a very interesting statistic that he discovered, which is that, for example, in marriages, up to 40 years of marriage, 67% of marriages are divorced, a very high number.
But half of those divorces, 54% of those divorces, occur in the first seven years. So the majority, as he says, of divorces comes from, let's say, new problems, simply a misunderstanding or, let's say, bad choice on the wall. At the same time, he breaks many myths. The myths that marriage wears you out, that it is something that takes your life, is not true. Married people live four more years. The problems come from bad marriages. He says that a peaceful divorce is much better than a hostile marriage. If you don't get along with your partner, if you don't have a positive diary, it's better to get divorced. Because if you stay together with a person, and you don't have to be together all your life, only about five years is what he calculates.
If you stay together with a person with whom you don't get along, you're going to have physiological problems, psychological stress, increased blood pressure, heart disease, anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, violence, psychosis, homicide, and even substance abuse. So guys and girls, if you're not in the relationship you're in, finish it. Y en este estudio él también descubre otros mitos que él pensaba que eran verdad de las relaciones, pero terminan no siéndolos. Como por ejemplo la reciprocidad, el devolver los favores. Él pensaba, como mucha otra gente, que para tener una buena relación hay que dar de regreso a la otra persona lo que ellos te dan. Y él dice que eso no es un factor determinante de un matrimonio exitoso.
Lo que sí va a ser determinante es si la pareja lo hace por querer hacerlo, por estar feliz, punto.
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