Why You Couldn't Handle Medieval Women πŸ‘‘πŸ•―οΈ | The Surprising Reality of Women's Lives in the Middle Ages | Boring History For Sleep

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Boring History for Sleep 3h 46m 1 speaker 7 chapters transcribed 1 month ago
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How would modern 'cool' behavior fail in a 14th-century courtship?

Jeremy Bamber 0:00
Hey there, time travellers. Tonight we're talking about medieval women, and why you, yes you, would have crashed and burned trying to win one over. Drop yourself in the year 1400, hit her with your best modern move, a chill smile and a laid-back joke and congratulations. You've just failed harder than a knight who forgot his horse. Not your outfit, not your smell. You'd flop because you'd act way too relaxed, and to her, relaxed meant empty. Forget grabbing coffee. She wanted public tears and poems about dying for her love. She could legally tell you no, and one filthy word could nuke your reputation across the whole village before sundown. By the end, you'll see why your cool, calm, mysterious vibe wouldn't make her swoon.
Jeremy Bamber 0:44
It would make her suspicious, like you're hiding something. So smash that like button, and before we ride in, drop a comment and tell me. What city are you watching from? And what time is it where you are right now? Let's go. So let's start with the single most important thing you'd have to unlearn the moment your feet hit that muddy 14th century street. It isn't the language. It isn't the food, though that's its own special adventure. It's the volume. Not the volume of sound, exactly, though medieval towns were plenty loud. I mean the emotional volume. The dial on human feeling in this world was cranked all the way to the top, and then the knob was snapped off and thrown in a ditch. Everything was loud.
Jeremy Bamber 1:23
Joy was loud. Grief was loud. Faith was the loudest of all. And you, with your carefully curated indoor voice, and your talent for keeping your face blank in awkward situations, would have stuck out like a man wearing sunglasses at a funeral. The historian Johann Huizinga spent a whole book trying to describe this, a work he published in 1919 called The Autumn of the Middle Ages, and his big argument was beautifully simple. Life back then, he said, had the harshness and the intensity of an open flame. There was no buffer between a person and their feelings. The contrast was savage. The distance between rich and poor, between sickness and health, between a feast day and an ordinary Tuesday, was so vast that every emotion arrived at full strength with nothing to soften the blow.
Jeremy Bamber 2:09
We modern people live in a world of climate control, both literal and emotional. We have thermostats for our houses, and we have a thousand tiny social customs for keeping our feelings at room temperature. They had neither. Naturally, this made for a much more dramatic dating scene. Picture a religious procession, because these happened constantly, and they were the great public theatre of the age. A relic arrives in town, or a holy day comes around, or a plague needs averting, and the whole community pours out into the street, and I do mean the whole community, not a polite few who felt like it. Everybody. Now picture them not strolling, not chatting, not checking to see who else showed up, but walking barefoot over stone and mud, dressed in rough sackcloth that would make modern thermal underwear look like a spa robe, and weeping.
Jeremy Bamber 2:56
Openly. For hours. Grown men with calloused hands and grown women and small children, all of them streaming tears down their faces as a priest walked at the centre of it, holding the consecrated host up high for everyone to see. This was the emotional centrepiece of the event, and the tears were not a side effect. They were the point. Try to sit with how strange that would feel to you. If you saw an entire town spontaneously sobbing in the street today, your first instinct would be to assume a tragedy. Pull out your phone and check the news. For them, this was a good day. A spiritually productive day. The tears were the proof that things were going well, that hearts were soft and open and turned in the right direction.
Jeremy Bamber 3:38
A procession where nobody cried would have been considered a bit of a flop, the medieval equivalent of throwing a party and having everybody stand around the edges of the room staring at their feet. The preachers understood this perfectly, and they leaned into it like professionals.

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