Order the Ultimate You book here to receive exclusive bonus instantly: https://tci.rocks/order-ultimate-you KEY TOPICS AND TIME STAMPS: 0.22 Glam: One of the things that I love is a concept you share in your book about conscious living • There’s unconscious things, beliefs, the muck, in all of our lives that hold us back from moving forward • Sharon: The muck, I agree • I would say most of us have lived years automatically • Years getting up, getting ready the same way, going to work the same way, reacting the same way to people, getting defensive the same way, rejecting feedback the same way and then thinking life somehow is going to be different • We have to start questioning, how automatic am I being in this moment? How reactive am I being in this moment? How can I be more conscious in this moment? • Glam: And what I love about it, is it actually walks you the process of that • Sharon: Right, as I’ve said many times, being told the answer is within is super unhelpful if you look in and you just feel like crap • I wrote the book the way I wished I’d been taught at the beginning of the journey, that there are ways of looking within we can train our minds and our consciousness to start taking care of us 7.57 Sharon: Let’s challenge our beliefs • I used to hold dear the belief that I couldn’t trust people. That’s just turned 180 • I had to challenge that belief consciously for many years before I could arrive at a different place • There’s always a tension between rigidity and permeability • So rigidity would be exampled by my way is the right way • There's black and white thinking, there's absolutism • On the opposite extreme in the dichotomy is the permeability • Some people have been raised where anything goes where your right simply because you're so special because you're perfect in every single way • So one of those is our automatic default mode • If we want progress we have to have a go at doing something different, seeing things differently 15.58 Another balance is, do I belong, or do I differentiate? • And am I belonging for reasons that are for my own wellbeing, or because of pressure from the group? • How far can I differentiate before the tension gets to be too much? • We often mix up love and loyalty, we define love as not rocking the boat, existing within the rules of the group • We have to learn how we can belong as a differentiated self • That’s emotional maturity, when I can hold both in the one space • Where I can sit with my family, be myself even if it bothers someone, and still feel like I belong • And I will never know me unless I'm prepared to hold that space for me • And when you first do it, it’s not pretty • But once you do it, share it with somebody and say I had a go and it was messy • And that’s the first step OTHER RESOURCES: • Ultimate You Book - https://tci.rocks/order-ultimate-you • Ultimate You Quest Telecast - www.ultimateyouquest.com • Upcoming Events at The Coaching Institute - www.thecoachinginstitute.com.au/trainings • Sharon’s New Website - www.sharonpearson.com • Disruptive Leadership- https://www.disruptiveleading.com/ • Phone The Coaching Institute - 1800 094 927 • The Coaching Institute Fan Page – https://www.facebook.com/BecomeALifeCoach • Feedback/Reviews/Suggest a top to be discussed - [email protected] • Perspectives YouTube Channel – https://www.tci.rocks/youtube

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“What did the council decide on item 42?” — answered with the speaker and the moment.

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