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Chapter 1: What is the main topic discussed in this episode?
Conan O'Brien needs a fan. Want to talk to Conan? Visit teamcoco.com slash call Conan. Okay, let's get started.
Hey, Brooke. Welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Fan.
Hey, how's it going?
Hey, Brooke. How are you?
I'm great. How are you?
I'm doing all right. Where I don't see where you are in the world. Where are you?
I'm in New York, currently in Queens.
You're in Queens. Oh, terrific. And all I know about you, it says here, and this is fascinating to me, is that you are an intimacy coordinator. Is that correct?
Yeah, that's correct. It's the best job in the world.
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Chapter 2: What is an intimacy coordinator and why is it important?
If you think about, you know, back in the day, it was a... It was a kiss and then the camera would drift over to an open window and some billowing curtains and then pan back over and people were smoking cigarettes and the covers are pulled up to their chins. So obviously, as sex scenes become more graphic and realistic, you need people there to make sure that everything's copacetic.
Is that correct?
Yeah. Yeah, I think the position came out of the Me Too movement, where all of a sudden, the awareness of some of the abuses in Hollywood became very apparent. And as a result, producers started being willing to pay for someone to be there, both for guaranteeing that actors can consent to what's being asked of them, in a private setting with someone who's not in charge of hiring or firing them.
Oh, right, right.
And then also exactly what you're saying, the artistic side of it, which is the fun part, is making the scenes more believable, authentic, compelling, absurd, whatever the need of that project is.
Okay. I mean, I'm curious, first of all, how did you become, how does one become an intimacy coordinator?
Yeah, well, nowadays, there's schools you can go to. But I started back in 2016. I was an actor for a bunch of years, and I tended to get cast in roles that involved intimacy or trauma. And I realized that I'd taken years and years of study—I have my MFA in performance— And all of my teachers taught me how to get to the place of grief or fear or terror, but not how to get back from it.
And I had a summer that I was doing three shows in a row, three theater shows, where I cried for four months, basically, in every show. And I was like, I need a way to come back to who I am that's healthy. So I started creating a warm-down for actors, and theater started bringing me in to teach it. And then I'm queer. I came out late in life.
And when I came out, I realized right away I wanted to tell queer stories because I hadn't come out earlier because I hadn't seen representation of bisexuality.
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Chapter 3: How did Brooke become an intimacy coordinator?
Okay. Now, a couple of things here. First of all, that thing seems huge. What do you do with all the extra room? Is that for cash and credit cards too? No. Absolutely. Cell phone. I'm just looking at that thinking, thinking like there's a lot of extra room. You know, I don't know what kind of freaks you're working with, but I'm keeping a book in there. But Brooke. OK. Fluids.
We have to talk about this. Is this something, and I'm asking if you're listening right now and there are children in the car, you know, what are you doing? But do people get themselves in a state while they're acting where there could be various secretions?
Honestly, not very often, if at all. If someone were to get aroused, for example, there are lots of things you can do to let that go. Just think about baseball.
That's what I do. Just think about 1975 Red Sox and it all goes away. Oh, wait, no, it comes back with a vengeance.
I'll definitely give that advice.
Start thinking about Dwight Evans. That's a good looking man over there in right field. Anyway, so it doesn't happen that often. What is, oh my God, what is the thing that's depicted in most sex scenes that you see that's the most inaccurate? Do you know what I mean? Something where you're like, they always do this in scenes and it's not how it really works.
Well, two things, actually, I would say. One, a very fast orgasm, where it's like we started touching and now we're all orgasming together at the same time.
Yeah.
But the other, I would say, is we often don't see the moment of... where, you know, like all of a sudden they're just having sex. But in real life, it takes some effort for the penis to find a vagina, for example.
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Chapter 4: What challenges do intimacy coordinators face on set?
Yeah, probably not.
And what movie was that for? Is that Toy Story 5? What is that? You just got fired from it? You just got fired. They're now editing me out of Toy Story 5 as we speak. Don't worry, it's a $100 million fix at the last second. Pixar has the money. So you have those figurines ready to go. I mean, it's not like you have to improvise with a G.I. Joe and a Thor and an Iron Man, right?
No, I have a whole kit of stuff I bring to set.
I bet you do.
Whether it be the barriers you saw, these guys. I use this for a barrier sometimes.
What is that? That looks like a turkey.
This is just a Squishmallow. But sometimes if someone's having a rough day, it's a little bit hilarious if I just put this between the two people. Because you can't have a bad day when you've got a Squishmallow near you.
I think I'm aware that I'm not an actor every time, a true actor, every time I see a sex scene. And I think, I don't know how these people do this, you know, because there's 75 people around them. And I just can't imagine how they do it. Orgasming, you know, pretending to orgasm. It's just...
And, you know, and then there's a sound guy, you know, two inches away from you who just had a liverwurst sandwich. And you know what I mean? Yeah. Or a cha tobacco. And it's insane.
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