Menu
Sign In Search Podcasts Libraries Charts People & Topics Add Podcast API Blog Pricing
Podcast Image

Conan O’Brien Needs A Friend

Zach Galifianakis Returns

04 May 2026

Transcription

Transcript generated automatically by AI and may contain errors.

Chapter 1: What does Zach Galifianakis think about being Conan O'Brien's friend?

3.389 - 16.159 Zach Galifianakis

Hi, my name is Zach Galifianakis, and I feel Zach Galifianakis about being Conan O'Brien's friend. I have to say, I feel up, Zach Galifianakis.

0

16.179 - 44.823 Conan O'Brien

You don't seem up. Fall is here, hear the yell. Back to school, ring the bell. Brand new shoes, walking blues. Climb the fence, books and pens. I can tell that we are gonna be friends. Yes, I can tell that we are gonna be friends. Hey there, and welcome to Conan O'Brien Needs a Friend, joined by Sonam Obsession.

0

Chapter 2: What early job did Zach Galifianakis have before comedy?

45.464 - 45.744 Sona Ovsessian

Hi.

0

46.105 - 61.247 Conan O'Brien

And, wow, let's pump it up a little bit. Hi, hi. I wish you were a voice on Siri. Oh. And you're just like, hey. Hi. Yeah. There'd be no follow-ups for Siri. What else can I help you with?

0

Chapter 3: Why is it important for comedians to challenge the powerful?

61.307 - 69.359 Conan O'Brien

Forget it, Siri. And David Hopping, you're a cheery chap. Hello. Good to see you. You too. Sona, you asked me to do a lot of favors, and I want to talk about this.

0
0

70.501 - 73.364 Conan O'Brien

What? Yeah, you do. You ask me to do a lot of favors.

0

Chapter 4: What is the concept behind Zach's new show, This Is a Gardening Show?

73.764 - 92.941 Conan O'Brien

Can you do this for me? Can you do that for me? You know, it's Armenian this week and it's Armenian that week. Can you do a thing for me? And sometimes I want you to know that it's a little much. You take advantage. Can you do a blurb for my book? Can you also write an intro, then an outro? I mean, what's going on? Do you see me and just see a doormat? Is that what you see? Oh, my God.

0

93.181 - 99.527 Conan O'Brien

Hey, what if I get you a doormat and instead of saying welcome, it's just my face because you walk all over it all the time anyway?

0
0

100.741 - 106.805 Sona Ovsessian

Oh, that's so unfair. I'm so mad. I hate asking you for favors.

0

106.886 - 110.958 Conan O'Brien

I know. Well, you don't hate it that much. I'm sorry.

Chapter 5: How does Zach Galifianakis incorporate his gardening passion into his life?

110.998 - 113.782 Conan O'Brien

How could you hate it that much?

0

113.802 - 115.164 Sona Ovsessian

Why are you cackling so hard about it?

0

115.184 - 117.066 Conan O'Brien

You're like a bird saying, I hate building a nest.

0

117.086 - 120.451 Sona Ovsessian

How many times do I tell you Conan agreed to do something for me?

0

120.571 - 142.085 Conan O'Brien

Hey, guess what? I'm an owl saying, I hate hooting. Hoo, hoo. Hoo, hoo. Hoo, hoo. I sure hate it. Hoo, hoo. Hoo, hoo. 23 hours later, hoo, hoo. I sure hate it. Oh, that's my impression. If you were an owl and asking a favor was hooting, you'd be hooting a lot. Yeah.

142.145 - 147.155 Sona Ovsessian

No, it's good. It's good for you to explain it. I hate asking you for favors.

Chapter 6: What insights does Zach share about the impact of fame?

147.536 - 152.807 Sona Ovsessian

There's so many things people ask me to ask you that I specifically say you filter stuff out.

0

153.188 - 155.352 Conan O'Brien

Yeah. How could there be more?

0

155.332 - 179.23 Sona Ovsessian

what are you talking about do you know how much stuff first of all it's your fault because you made me you put me on this podcast people know who i am now i'm attached to you for the rest of your life until you die and so please that's not for months oh come on but it's it comes with i'm sorry you did it it's it's your it's you it's your fault your speech champion yeah

0

180.256 - 185.463 Conan O'Brien

Listen. Come on. Listen, I don't begrudge you anything.

0

185.884 - 187.145 Unknown

Yes, you do.

187.165 - 190.83 Conan O'Brien

I do. Of course I do. You're making fun of me right now. I just made it the whole front of the show.

191.411 - 197.279 Matt Gourley

Yes. It's a lot. And David, do I do a lot of favors for people? You do a lot of favors for everybody, not just Sona. Yeah.

197.299 - 198.621 Sona Ovsessian

What the fuck, David?

198.681 - 200.864 Matt Gourley

I'm just supporting. I don't ask for that many favors.

Chapter 7: How does Zach view the relationship between comedy and politics?

200.984 - 205.209 Matt Gourley

You do favors for everyone. You do favors. Raise your hand if Sona's ever done a favor for you.

0
0

205.822 - 208.685 Unknown

The only I actually never.

0

208.705 - 216.813 Conan O'Brien

When your Aquaman figurine got stolen from your apartment, you asked me to put up posters and I did. I never. And when your Iron Man got stolen, I put up posters for that.

0

216.874 - 217.274 Unknown

That's right.

217.594 - 223.921 Conan O'Brien

He offered. Then when you're several hundred of your other figurines were stolen, you asked me to call the police for you. And I did. That's right. It was very nice.

224.141 - 233.152 Unknown

I'll just say I never asked for favors, but I know that you would help me out. The only favor I've ever asked you for is when you were in my short film. And you did it, and it was great. Yeah, so don't say you never asked me for a favor.

233.332 - 236.017 Conan O'Brien

But in 25 years, I've asked you for one thing.

236.097 - 236.718 Unknown

Can I ask you a question?

Chapter 8: What humorous anecdotes does Zach share about his past experiences?

236.738 - 244.469 Conan O'Brien

Yeah, to be in a movie you made. That's a big favor. I'm just saying, you can't start by saying I never asked for favors, except for that one time when you did me a huge favor.

0

244.489 - 247.714 Unknown

I'm trying to help you in your argument with Sona. Why are you attacking me?

0

247.915 - 267.959 Conan O'Brien

Because when I see you, I just see red. You're like, I'm a bull, and you're a giant red blankie. That's flopping around in the wind. You do a lot of favors for everybody. And I don't know that you've ever asked any of us for a favor. You know, Baskin Robbins famously, I think, had 38 flavors. I think I do more than 38 favors a day.

0

267.999 - 273.365 Sona Ovsessian

That's our whole job. Our whole job was doing stuff for you. That's our whole job. You get paid for that. I know.

0

273.385 - 277.87 Matt Gourley

I got you your lunch today. I ordered you a leave. Can we talk about that?

277.89 - 278.53 Sona Ovsessian

Yeah.

278.55 - 286.08 Matt Gourley

Hey, if people know out there that I occasionally take a leave. I don't know what you like to keep secret. No, that's a secret.

286.12 - 298.917 Conan O'Brien

I think we've all... No one must know of my Aleve. You know, that's why I always, when I throw out my Aleve bottles, I always try to throw them out in someone else's trash can because no one can know that I occasionally have some muscle stiffness.

298.937 - 302.723 Sona Ovsessian

I don't have time for this bit. I'm angry right now. I'm so mad right now.

Comments

There are no comments yet.

Please log in to write the first comment.